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Social Psychology Week 6 SOCIAL INTERACTION AND ATTRACTION Is Social Media Destroying Your Self-Esteem? Considered in light of Newsweek’s recent feature on the mounting evidence that intense internet usage contributes to increased anxiety and depression and even psychosis, it’s a fair and timely question to ask. Social Needs • Around the world and across age-groups, most people spend about 3/4th of their time with other people. • People do not merely want the presence of others, but close ties to people who care about them. Benefits of Social Relations • • • • Attachment (comfort & security) Social integration (shared interests & attitudes) Reassurance of Worth Sense of Reliable Alliance (help in times of need) • Guidance • Opportunity for Nurturance Watch video • Watch video – “Gender Differences in Sexual Assertiveness” • Watch video on “Rules of Attraction” • Do activity Loneliness The subjective discomfort we feel when our social relations lack some important feature Loneliness • This is different from aloneness, or the objective state of being apart from others • People are somewhat more likely to feel lonely when they are alone – Especially if social norms dictate that one “should” be with others (e.g., Saturday night) Loneliness • About 1 in 4 Americans reports feeling very lonely in the past 2 weeks • Situational loneliness occurs due to life changes • Chronic loneliness occurs for about 10% of Americans regardless of the situation • Possible biological basis • Associated with depression, substance abuse, and illness Loneliness • No segment of society is immune • Those who are more at risk include: – children of divorced parents – shy people – people with lower self-esteem – poor people – single people Loneliness • Contrary to stereotype, teenagers and young adults are more at risk than the elderly • It is not clear if this is a “generation gap” in willingness to report feelings, a function of greater life transitions among the young, or greater social skills and more realistic expectations among the elderly • What factors go into attraction – What encourages you to go into a social/personal relationship? • Watch “Love – you’re doing it wrong” • Why has the Internet become such a popular and accepted form of relating? • What are the positive and negative aspects of interacting online? • Are there new skills that may be relevant to being successful in the online dating world Basic principles of attraction In general… • We like people who like us • We like people who satisfy our needs • We like people when the rewards they provide outweigh the costs (Social Exchange Theory) The Equity Theory • Relationships are most satisfying when the ratio between benefits and contributions is similar for both partners. • There might be individual differences in importance of equity. Basic principles of attraction Specific Determinants of Liking… • Proximity • Familiarity • Similarity • Personal Qualities of the Other • Let’s take a closer look… Proximity • The best single predictor of whether two people will be friends is how far apart they live • Watch “Inside the Female Brain” Proximity • Why does proximity have an effect? – Ease of availability – Lower cost in terms of time, money, forethought – Cognitive dissonance pressures to like those with whom we must associate – The mere anticipation of interaction increases liking Familiarity • The mere exposure effect : simply being exposed to a person (or other stimulus) tends to increase liking for it Familiarity • Why does familiarity promote liking? Possibilities include: – Evolutionarily adaptive • Unfamiliar objects & people may be dangerous – Improves recognizing, which is a 1st step to liking – Familiar is more predictable – Familiar is assumed to be more similar to oneself Similarity • We like others who are similar to us in attitudes, interests, values, background & personality Similarity • In romantic relationships, the tendency to choose similar others is called the matching principle. • People tend to match their partners on a wide variety of attributes • age, intelligence, education, religion, attractiveness, height • But friendship and love can transcend differences in background Similarity • Why do people prefer similar others? – Similar others are more rewarding – Interacting with similar others minimizes the possibility of cognitive dissonance – We expect to be more successful with similar others Similarity • What mechanisms foster similarity in close relationships? – Selective attraction – only considering those who are similar on certain dimensions (e.g. religion) – Social influence – the people are initially less similar (when they start the relationship), but influence each other through interactions (becoming more similar) – Shared environmental factors – similar experiences may lead people to have similar attitudes, etc. • As people interact with similar others, they tend to become even more similar Similarity • Limits to Similarity include: – Differences can also be rewarding • Differences allow people to pool-shared knowledge and skills to mutual benefit – Similarity can be threatening when someone similar to us experiences an unfortunate fate Physical Attractiveness • One reason we like more attractive people is that they are believed to possess other good qualities (stereotype) – In fact, according to on study (Feingold, 1992), more attractive people may be more socially skilled – They are also believed to be more intelligent, dominant, & mentally healthy Physical Attractiveness • In a classic study on the importance of physical attractiveness, college students were randomly assigned to each other as dates for an evening. People who were more attractive were better liked by their date (Walster et al., 1966). Physical Attractiveness • Other Effects of Attractiveness – Physically attractive people are more likely to receive help, job recommendations, and more lenient punishments – People who are disabled may have to overcome stereotypes that portray them as unattractive & lonely Physical Attractiveness • Who is Attractive? – Culture plays a large role in standards of attractiveness – However, people do tend to agree on some features that are seen as more attractive: • Statistically “average” faces • Symmetrical or balanced faces Physical Attractiveness • Why does attractiveness matter? – People believe attractiveness is correlated with other positive characteristics – Being associated with an attractive other leads a person to be seen as more attractive him or herself – According to evolutionary theory, attractiveness may provide a clue to health and reproductive fitness Personal Relationships • There are three basic characteristics of personal relationships: – Frequent interaction over a long period of time – Many different kinds of activities – Strong mutual influence Interdependence Theory • Analyzes the exchange and coordination of outcomes between interdependent partners Interdependence Theory • A reward is anything a person gains from an interaction – It can be particular or general, symbolic or concrete – Basic types of rewards: Love Money Status Information Goods Services Interdependence Theory • A cost is any negative consequence that occurs in an interaction or relationship – Time – Energy – Conflict – Others’ Disapproval – Opportunity Cost Self-Disclosure • Self-disclosure is a special type of conversation in which we share intimate information and feelings with another person. Self-Disclosure • Reasons we disclose – Social Approval – Relationship Development – Self-Expression – Self-Clarification – Social Control Self-Disclosure • Liking • Self-Disclosure • In general, we most like people whose selfdisclosure is reciprocal and gradual. • The impact of self-disclosure on liking depends on the nature of the relationship. – E.g., an intimate self-disclosure by one’s roommate may be received very differently than an intimate self-disclosure by a random stranger in a lecture hall. Self-Disclosure • Self-disclosure also entails risks: – Indifference – Rejection – Loss of Control – Betrayal • Because of the risks of self-disclosure, we sometimes conceal our deepest feelings and keep secrets What would you do? HOMEWORK assignment: Watch an episode of “What would you do?” on Hulu.com and then write a paper…see handout for further instructions. Final Paper • Unit 4 Graded PROJECT Part 2: Literature Review (Due WEEK 8 – NEXT WEEK) • Unit 10 Graded PROJECT Part 4: FINAL White Paper (Due WEEK 10) • Unit 11 Graded PROJECT Part 5: Student project presentation (Due WEEK 10) 40