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END VIOLENCE TOGETHER FOR THE DIGNITY OF EVERY WOMAN Insert your agency/program name Presentation Overview Insert Length of Time • • • • • What Is Violence Against Women? How Much Does It Happen? Why Focus on Violence Against Women? What Is The Impact? What Can We Do To End Violence Together? Violence Against Women is a CRIME and includes: • Sexual Assault (Acquaintance Rape, Date Rape) • Violence In Relationships (Dating Violence, Domestic Violence, Family Violence, Battering, Spousal abuse, Intimate Partner Violence) • Criminal Harassment (Stalking) How Much Does It Happen? “Estimating the prevalence of violence against women—the number of women in the population who are affected by violence—is challenging due to the very private nature of these experiences.” • • Measuring Violence Against Women: Statistical Trends 2006 Statistics Canada In Other Words… People might not talk about abuse because of: • Not recognizing the abuse as abuse • Embarrassment • Shame • Denial • Fear of not being believed • Fear of rejection by partner or peers • Fear of retaliation or abandonment • Belief that the abuse is trivial and not worth reporting • Belief that the abuse is their fault. Dating Violence: A Fact Sheet from the Department of Justice Canada How Much Does It Happen? • Almost 40% of women in Canada have been sexually assaulted since age 16. • Approximately 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 6 boys will experience some form of unwanted sexual contact before they reach 16. Dangerous Domains: Violence Against Women in Canada Johnson, H., 1996 How Much Does It Happen? • 31% of sexual assaults happen in dating or acquaintance relationships • 9 to 17 year old girls have the highest rate of sexual assault and physical assaults by friends or acquaintances How Much Does It Happen? • 6% of sexual assaults are reported to the police in Canada (E Division, RCMP, 2005) • In the year 2000, 24,000 sexual assaults were reported to police in Canada. (Statistics Canada) • In the year 2000, 3,700 sexual assaults were reported to police in BC. (Statistics Canada) How Much Does It Happen? • This means that in the year 2000 over 400,000 women in Canada and over 61,000 women in BC were sexually assaulted! • 61% of sexual offences reported to police in 2003 involved victims under 18 years old. About 80% of those victims were girls. How Much Does It Happen? • In some First Nations communities in BC, over 90% of the women have experienced sexual violence. • 53% of women who live with disabilities from birth have been raped, abused or assaulted. • As with all forms of violence against women, immigrant women, refugee women, poor women and transgendered people are more vulnerable to sexual violence. How Much Does It Happen? • 10,273 incidents of violence in relationships were reported to BC police in 2005: – – – – 9% increase since 2004 74% involved a male offender 16% involved a female offender represents 26% of all assaults in BC How Much Does It Happen? Number of spousal homicide victims in Canada 1975- 2004 Newfoundland and Labrador Prince Edward Island Nova Scotia New Brunswick Quebec Ontario Manitoba Saskatchewan Alberta British Columbia Yukon Northwest Territories Nunavut Female 15 6 62 52 497 753 123 98 244 293 9 22 4 Male 7 1 24 7 87 186 48 59 97 104 5 11 2 Canada 2,178 638 How Much Does It Happen? • In 2004: – 75% of criminal harassment (“stalking”) incidents reported to the police were directed at women – 50% of the women were stalked by a person with whom they had an intimate relationship – Stalking is the number one risk factor for actual and attempted murders of women (McFarlane et. Al, 2002) – 90% of people reported for stalking are men Measuring Violence Against Women: Statistical Trends, Statistics Canada, 2006) – Two thirds (66%) of all criminal harassment incidents occurred at the victim’s home. Types of Violence Experienced by Women in Canada, 2004 Beaten, choked, used a gun/knife, sexually assaulted (99,060) 39% Threatened, threw something (27,900) 11% Pushed, shoved, slapped (101,600) 40% Kicked, bit, hit, hit with something (25,400) 10% Rate of Criminal Harassment Against Women, By Age In Canada, 2004 45 years and over 14% under 25 years 41% 34 to 44 year olds 18% 25 to 34 year olds 27% Why Focus on Women? • International Agencies such as the United Nations, the World Health Organization, and Amnesty International have identified violence against women as a global human rights issue. Why Focus on Women? • Women are more likely than men to be the victims of the most severe forms of spousal assault, as well as spousal homicide, sexual assault and stalking. Measuring Violence Against Women: Statistical Trends 2006 Statistics Canada Why Focus on Women? Women are: – 6 times more likely than men to report being sexually assaulted – 5 times more likely to require medical attention as a result of assault – 3 times more likely to be physically injured – Almost twice as likely to report being threatened with or having a gun or knife used against them – Much more likely to fear for their lives or the lives of their children Spousal Abuse: A Fact Sheet From the Department of Justice Canada What is Violence Against Women? Sexual Assault • Any form of sexual contact without a person’s consent, including the threat of sexual contact without consent • Can range from unwanted sexual touching to forced sexual intercourse What is Violence Against Women? Sexual Assault • Level 1: Sexual Assault [s.271] • Level 2: Sexual Assault with a Weapon, Threats to a Third Party, or Causing Bodily Harm [s.272] • Level 3: Aggravated Sexual Assault [s.273] What is Violence Against Women? Sexual Assault 151 152 153 155 163.1 Sexual interference with a person under age 14 Invitation to sexual touching with a person under age 14 Sexual exploitation of a person aged 14 and under 18 Incest Covers child pornography What is the Impact? Sexual Assault • Psychological/emotional: –Fear of physical injury, mutilation and/or death –Anger –Humiliation –Shame –Guilt –Shock –Sleep disturbances What is the Impact? Sexual Assault • • • • • Serious physical injuries Unwanted pregnancies & miscarriages STDs including HIV/AIDS Headaches & fatigue Loss of appetite/nausea What is the Impact? Sexual Assault •Self Blame •Loss of hope •Minimization/Denial •Loss of a Sense of Esteem •Loss of a Sense of Power •Shattering of World View •Loss of a Sense of Safety & Trust What is the Impact? Sexual Assault • • • • • • • Addictions Self-esteem Self-injury Suicidal ideation Fears/anxiety Physical symptoms Dissociation experiences • Sexual difficulties • Eating disorders • Emotional difficulties • Sleep disturbances • Relationship issues • Parenting issues What is the Impact? Sexual Assault Family members may experience: • Anger • Helplessness • Shock • Disbelief • Guilt • Fear These may be directed at the survivor What is Violence Against Women? Violence In Relationships Violence in Relationships • Physical assault: hitting, punching, choking, slapping, pulling hair • Sexual assault: any form of forced sexual activity • Threats and Intimidation • Emotional abuse: insults, intimidation, control, isolation, mind games, put downs • Financial abuse: controlling, stealing and withholding money • Spiritual/cultural abuse: restricting spiritual or cultural practices or beliefs • Murder Violence In Relationships – The Law • The Canadian Criminal Code has no specific offence called “violence against women” or “spousal assault”. • Criminal Code provisions that most commonly apply include the offences of assault, sexual assault, criminal harassment, threats of violence, forcible confinement and homicide. Violence In Relationships - Pregnancy In Canada, 1 In Every 5 Women Assaulted By A Partner Is Assaulted During Pregnancy Statistics Canada, Family Violence in Canada, 1999 Canadian Women’s Foundation’s Violence Against Women Fact Sheet Violence In Relationships - Children • Death & Injury In Quatsino, Jay Handel killed his six children. • Witnessing Almost 40% of women assaulted by spouses said their children witnessed the violence against them (either directly or indirectly) and in many cases the violence was severe. In half of the cases of spousal violence against women that were witnessed by children, the woman feared for her life. What is the Impact? Violence In Relationships Children who are exposed to violence in the home suffer from emotional trauma, have poor educational outcomes, and are at increased risk of using violence to solve problems. Berman, H., J. Hardesty and J. Humphreys. 2004. Children of abused women. What is Dating Violence? It is one form of violence in relationships; in a dating relationship one person uses abuse to gain power and keep control over their partner. This abuse can be physical, emotional, or sexual. What is the Impact? Dating Violence • • • • • • A person who is being abused may have: Low self-esteem Withdrawal Depression Nervousness Unexplained cuts, bruises, scrapes, burns or bite marks. What is the Impact? Dating Violence • • • • • • • • A person who is being abused may: Stop participating in things they enjoy Have little or no interest in family activities Have difficulty sleeping Not be able to concentrate Experience memory problems Start missing school more, or Experience a drop in their grades. What is Violence Against Women? Criminal Harassment On August 1, 1993, the Criminal Code was amended to create the new offence of criminal harassment. It was introduced as a specific response to violence against women, particularly to domestic violence against women. However, the offence is not restricted to domestic violence and applies equally to all victims of criminal harassment. Criminal Harassment: A Handbook For Police And Crown Prosecutors. Department of Justice Canada What is Violence Against Women? Criminal Harassment Examples of Criminal Harassment: •calling you over and over again, and perhaps hanging up whenever you answer the phone •contacting you on the Internet or through constant e-mail messages What is Violence Against Women? Criminal Harassment • following you, your family or friends • leaving threatening voice messages • sending you gifts you do not want • watching you or tracking where you go • threatening you, your children, family, pets or friends Criminal Harassment: A Handbook For Police And Crown Prosecutors. Department of Justice Canada What is Violence Against Women? Criminal Harassment While many crimes are defined by conduct that results in a very clear outcome (for example, murder), criminal harassment generally consists of: • repeated conduct that is carried out over a period of time and that causes victims to reasonably fear for their safety but does not necessarily result in physical injury. Criminal Harassment: A Handbook For Police And Crown Prosecutors. Department of Justice Canada What is the Impact? Criminal Harassment Some common responses by victims to the trauma of being stalked include the following: •self-reproach; •a tendency to downplay the impact of the stalking; •interpretation of the stalking as a “private matter”; •a sense of betrayal and stigma; •anxiety and fear, due to the unpredictability of the stalker’s conduct; •feelings of being helpless and unable to control their lives; •lack of confidence in police, resulting in a failure to report; •inaction, due to a lack of awareness that the conduct is criminal; and •denial or embarrassment. Criminal Harassment: A Handbook For Police And Crown Prosecutors. Department of Justice Canada Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour Using violence and intimidation to get your own way in relationships often works in the short run, but it will cost you in the long run -- you will lose self-respect and the respect and affection of others. Stopping violence in relationships means doing a lot of work on yourself. Here are some tools that others have found useful in doing this work. If you use them every day it will get easier, but it takes time, so don't give up on yourself!! Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour NO EXCUSES The first thing you have to do to stop violence and other abuse in a relationship is to stop making excuses and blaming the other person. Make a promise to yourself and to your partner that you will not be violent - no matter what happens. Remember, there is no justification for abuse. If you are abusive, it's YOUR problem. Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour TIME-OUT The most important tool to learn is simply to take "timeout" when you feel yourself getting angry. Leaving a situation temporarily before you lose it always works. It's simple, but it's not always easy to walk away from conflict or argument when you're getting angry, when you want to win, when you know you're right, when abuse has worked in the past. Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour TALK YOURSELF DOWN You may not realize it, but you make YOURSELF angry. Most anger is caused by what we say to ourselves about the situation, not what happens or what other people do. Just listen to what you say to yourself when you are upset blaming, calling people names and threatening. Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour TALK YOURSELF DOWN • You can make yourself so angry that it seems natural to be violent or abusive. Instead, try "talking yourself down" when you get upset. Say things to yourself like, "Why am I so mad?" "Is this worth it?" "I can handle this better if I calm down." When you take time- out, you need to talk yourself down. Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour STAY STRAIGHT Many people who have a problem with violence and abuse also have a problem with alcohol or other drugs. Both problems need work. People with both problems have to stay clean before they can stop violence and other abuse. After they are straight, they may still be abusive, but at least they have a chance to work on the problem. STAY STRAIGHT • If you try to stop being abusive while you are still getting loaded, it will never work. Ending Violence Together Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour TALK WITH SOMEONE ELSE If you are often violent or abusive, you probably don't talk to others about your feelings. This means that the pressure rises. If you don't have close partners outside your main relationship, you end up depending too much on your partner. It's a setup for anger and abuse if something goes wrong. Adapted From: Tools for Ending Abusive Behaviour Duluth Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, Family Violence Project 1993 Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend •Let your friend know that you believe what they have told you -- chances are the situation is worse than what they tell you. •Encourage but do not pressure your friend to talk about the abuse. Allow them to say as much or as little as they want in their own words. Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend • Reassure your friend that they are not causing the abuse. The abusive person learned to use abuse as a way of controlling their partner long before they met. • Let your friend know that abusive relationships always get worse without outside help. Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend • Tell your friend that they are not alone in their situation. Abuse in relationships happens to many people, especially girls and women. People of all races, sexual orientations, ages and social classes are victims of abusive partners. • Your roles as a friend is to support, not rescue. Point out different options available to your friend and help them evaluate each one. Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend • No matter how tempting it is to bad-mouth the abusive partner, stop yourself. Most people who are in abusive relationships want the abuse to stop but want the relationship to continue. Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend • Help your friend with self-esteem. Tell them what you admire about them; why you value them as a friend; what their strengths and special qualities are. • Support your friend’s emotions: fear, anger, embarrassment, hope, and grief over the loss of the relationship, etc.. Adapted From: How to Help a Friend. Battered Women’s Support Services Ending Violence Together How to Help A Friend • Take care of yourself! Helping a friend who is in an abusive relationship is very difficult. You need to look after your own well being too. Talk with other friends or family about your feelings without giving away your friend’s name or betraying them. Ending Violence Together Support Services o VictimLINK (1-800-563-0808) o Over 400 service programs to assist in violence against women and children including: o Community-Based Victim Assistance Programs o Stopping The Violence Counselling o Outreach Programs o Transition Houses o Safe Homes o Second Stage Housing o Children Who Witness Violence o Helpline for Children (310-1234) Insert Agency or Program Name • Insert any info you think might be helpful about your services your contact info and how to get to you What would you do? Case Study Lucy’s Story • Last night I went out to a party with my friends and ran into my ex, John. We broke up because he was like Jekyll and Hyde – sweet one minute, mean the next minute. He was out with his friends and he seemed like he was pretty wrecked – probably drunk or high or both. He was yelling at me from across the kitchen, calling me and my friends names. I went to the dining room but as soon as I sat at the table John walked past me and pushed me. I fell on the ground and he stood over me laughing, calling me a loser and a drunk. I was so embarrassed I just got up and left. Lucy’s Story • John called this morning and said he is really sorry and he is going to go see a counsellor. He really wants to get back together but I just don’t know… I think I love him but he kind of scares me! Case Study 1. Is Lucy in danger? 2. How could you help Lucy? 3. How could you help John? 4. How would you plan for your own safety? QUESTIONS DISCUSSION END VIOLENCE TOGETHER FOR THE DIGNITY OF EVERY WOMAN Funding for the production of this presentation was provided by the BC Ministry of Community Services and created by the BC Association of Specialized Victim Assistance and Counselling Programs