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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Chapter Six
The Importance and Skill of Listening
Chapter Overview
Listening to others and understanding the meaning behind nonverbal messages is an important
skill for managers today. In this chapter we discuss listening: what it is, why it’s important,
and the barriers to effective listening. We discuss the characteristics of active listening and
strategies for listening actively. We also discuss what is involved in nonverbal communication
and how to improve one’s communication skills by being attuned to a person’s non-verbal
messages.
Learning Objectives
After reading this chapter, the student/reader will be able to:
 Ask a friend to be a good listener or sounding board (rather than a problem solver)
when discussing something important.
 Use behaviors that demonstrate willingness to be a good listener or sounding board.
 Differentiate between positive and negative listening behaviors.
 Accurately send nonverbal signals.
 Accurately interpret others' nonverbal signals.
Chapter Outline
Communication is the act of exchanging thoughts, messages, or information. This exchange
can happen through any number of channels. There are rich channels of communication, such
as face-to-face or telephone conversations, that are best used for messages with potentially
unclear meanings or with emotional content. There are also lean channels, such as e-mails or
memos, which are appropriate for routine messages. Communication is a two-way street. This
chapter reviews the basic concepts of effective listening and the importance of nonverbal
signals.
What is Listening?
 Listening goes beyond merely hearing what another person is saying to constructing
meaning from all the verbal and nonverbal signals the speaker is sending. Words often
comprise only a small part of a message being sent. To obtain the complete message you
must listen with your ears, eyes, and heart.

Effective listening has three dimensions:
1. Sensing involves hearing the words and receiving the nonverbal signals such as body
language and facial expressions.
2. Processing/evaluating involves understanding the meaning, interpreting the
implications, evaluating the nonverbal cues, and remembering the message.
3. Responding involves the listener sending the speaker verbal or nonverbal signals that
they are being heard.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening

There are several different types of listening:
1. Passive listening occurs when one is trying to absorb as much of the information
presented as possible.
2. Attentive listening occurs when one is genuinely interested in the speaker’s point of
view.
3. Active or empathetic listening is the most powerful level of listening; involves high
levels of attentiveness, clarification and processing of messages. True active listeners
spend almost 70 percent of their time listening and less than 30 percent of their time
talking (the “70/30” principle).
The Importance of Active Listening
Active listening:
 Shows the listener that you are concerned.
 Leads to getting better information.
 Encourages further communication.
 Has the potential to enhance relationships, involves offering mutual support and
developing common understanding.
 Strengthens trust and enhances interactions.
 Invites others to listen to you.
Barriers to Effective Listening
Many factors contribute to difficulties in listening:
 Physiological limitations.
 Inadequate background information.
 Selective perception.
 Selective memory.
 Selective expectation.
 Fear of being influenced or persuaded.
 Bias and being judgmental.
 Boredom.
 Partial listening and distractions.
 Rehearsing.
 Interference from emotions.
Characteristics of Active Listening
Several strategies to become an active listener:
 Show interest and be sincere in listening.
 Ask questions if you don't understand completely.
 Avoid distractions.
 Use direct eye contact.
 Do not interrupt.
 Read both the verbal and nonverbal messages.
 Be empathetic.
 Paraphrase to correct misinterpretations.
 Evaluate the message after hearing all the facts.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening




Concentrate on the message, not the messenger.
Give feedback to check accuracy, express your perspective and broaden the
interaction.
Listen with your entire body.
Don't talk so much yourself.
Active Listening and Organizations
 Leads to higher levels of employee responsiveness.
 Provides clearer understanding of organizational issues.
 Increases employee commitment to quality.
 Improves intra-organizational communication.
Nonverbal Communication




Nonverbal communication is conveying meaning or expressing feelings consciously or
subconsciously through means other than words. Research indicates that over 55 percent
of interpersonal communication is conveyed nonverbally.
Most of us trust nonverbal cues far more than we trust another’s words. When asked
which part of a message they relied on to detect the speaker’s true feelings, people relied
on the spoken word only 7 percent; on tone of voice and pace of speech, 38 percent; and
on facial expression and other body language, 55 percent. People will almost always
disbelieve the spoken word if an opposite message is being delivered with tone of voice,
posture, and facial expression.
Nonverbal communication cues fall into two broad classes.
1. Nonverbal visual cues include facial expressions, eye blinks, eye contact, gaze
aversion, nodding, smiles, postural shifts, physical positioning, and other bodily
behaviors.
2. Paraverbal communication cues include aspects related to speech, such as pitch,
pauses, tone of voice, inflection, and voice volume.
We communicate nonverbally in several ways:
1. Kinesics involves body movement, gestures and posture.
2. Para-language refers to the tone of voice, volume, pitch or speech rate.
3. Environment refers to the signals sent by the layout of the space or room, lighting,
color scheme, noise, decorations, etc.
4. Chronemics is the study of how human beings use and structure time.
5. Proxemics is the study of what you communicate by the way you use interpersonal
space.
6. Haptics (tactile communication) refers to the use of touch.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Teaching Notes
Motivating the discussion
 Imagine you were traveling to a business meeting. You (or your secretary) made
reservations several weeks earlier, yet when you arrive, there's only one room
available and it's not non-smoking as you requested. You're upset. It's 2am, you're
tired and you want the room you reserved. The desk clerk says there's nothing she can
do; she'll call the manager. How are you feeling at this point? (Angry, frustrated that
you have to wait to talk with the manager—without any guarantee that s/he will fix the
problem). Now, what if the desk clerk said, "I'm truly sorry. I know how frustrated
you must feel; I would if this happened to me. Let me get the manager; it's possible we
can work something out that's acceptable to you." In this scenario, the desk clerk is
still unable to offer immediate assistance, however, when she empathizes with you,
you are more likely to calm down and become a little less upset than when no such
empathy is offered. Discuss why this is so.
 Ask participants if they ever completed a task or assignment incorrectly because they
misunderstood the directions given. How could the situation have been prevented?
What responsibility do the student/teacher, employee/boss and/or child/parent have in
the creation and resolution of this misunderstanding?
 Other questions that can be asked to motivate the discussion are:
o Think about a recent time when you had a personal problem and shared
your concern with a good friend. Was your friend a good listener? What
listening behaviors did he or she exhibit that made you feel you were being
heard/understood?
o Can you identify someone in your workplace or class who is "good" at
listening? What characteristics does this person exhibit? What behaviors
do they use that exemplify effective listening?
o Think about your most recent manager: your boss, summer employer, club
officer, teacher or parent. Would you describe this person as a good
listener? Why or why not?
Ideas for presenting material
 One way to begin is with an activity like “Listening Via the Rumor Mill” (Exercise
6A). The difficulties in communication— especially listening—are likely to be
illustrated clearly. You could then ask students to brainstorm the reasons why the
beginning story became so modified in the end. Throughout the lecture, discussion,
and activities, refer back to this brainstormed list, e.g., "by doing this, this particular
problem should decrease." (Interesting data point: studies show that the grapevine is
not only an important source of information, but it is also about 75% accurate.1)
Another option is to videotape a talk show or debate (e.g., political). Show several
minutes and ask students to identify characteristics of effective and ineffective
listening skills. Ask students what impact one's listening skills have on "likeability,"
professionalism, etc. How do listening skills in a talk show or debate differ from those
in a one-on-one conversation?
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening


A dynamic way to begin the class is to have the participants engage in an activity
designed to help them experience the frustration that non-listening can cause. Arrange
the group into pairs and have one try to talk for a few minutes while the other actively
engages in non-verbal and verbal ineffective listening behaviors. Anything short of
hitting someone is permissible! The inattentive listener can avoid eye contact, take
notes while "listening," talk about something else, say they're listening while looking
around the room, pretend to watch TV or play a video game while "listening," overtalk, etc. Afterwards you can facilitate a discussion about (and scribe on the board)
the non-verbal and verbal examples of non-effective listening that were the most
frustrating for those who were trying to speak. This is a good lead-in to a discussion
about what strategies do work when trying to listen effectively.
Non-Verbal Messages and Organizations – Have students create a list of non-verbal
signals organizations send to stakeholders. Using the non-verbal categories listed in
the chapter, challenge groups to find examples for each category. Discuss how these
messages can impact business. Discuss how organizations can use non-verbals to
improve relationships with stakeholders
Discussion Questions
Why is active or empathic listening so hard to do?
 Selective perception, bias
 Physical and physiological barriers or limitations
 Selective memory
 Selective expectation or belief you know what the speaker is trying to say before s/he
completes (related to this is the self fulfilling prophecy)
 Boredom or disinterest
 Preoccupied coming up with our rebuttals to the speaker's arguments
 Use of jargon or language specific to a group, organization, etc.—not mentioned in the
book
Few would argue the importance of active or empathic listening. However, there may be
times when you aren't in the mood. Should a friend or loved one catch us at this time
and begin sharing a problem with you, what would you do?
 One option is to pretend to listen. Nod and say "uh huh" now and again.
 Another is to gently stop your friend and say, "I really want to hear what you have to
say, but I'm really preoccupied at the moment. Can we talk after lunch?
 Another option is to muster up the energy to get in the mood and be there for your
friend. You'd want the same from him/her.
 Discuss these options. While there's no right answer, the first option is not
recommended. Ask students why this is so.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
One element of active listening is maintaining eye contact with the speaker. For various
reasons, some people don't or can't do this. Why is this so and what impact might this
have on communication?
 Why? Self-esteem issues, fear of appearing confrontational, cultural differences (in
some cultures, direct eye contact is a sign of disrespect or challenge), habits.
 Based on our interpretation of eye contact, we could judge a speaker who makes little
or no eye contact as untrustworthy, sneaky, trying to hide something, inattentive,
uncaring. However, these interpretations may not hold in all cultures.
The text discusses proxemics or the way in which we use space in communicating and
how one's "safe zone" may be larger or smaller depending on the context (business or
personal) and the culture. If someone were too close, how would you respond?
 One option is to back away. The closer they come, the more you move away.
 Another option is to give nonverbal indications that the distance between you is too
small.
 Another option is to politely express your feelings about personal space in an "I"
message. "I feel uncomfortable when you stand so close to me. I don't want to offend
you, however, I need more space."
 Offer your conversation partner a seat across a table from you. Even if there's no
table, some feel more comfortable when seated closely than when standing closely.
 Discuss the pros and cons of the options.
Notes on Selected Exercises
Exercise 6–A
LISTENING VIA THE RUMOR MILL
Purpose: To illustrate effective listening techniques
Time: 20 min.
Resources/Set-up: Need five volunteers, copies of the rumor or story (see below) and a
chalkboard
Activity Instructions:
1. Five volunteers will be listeners. Have four of the volunteers leave the room.
2. Instruct all others in the room to serve as observers, taking note of effective or
ineffective listener behaviors (i.e., paraphrasing, eye contact, interrupting the speaker).
3. Tell the first listener (A) a brief story or read a short passage. Another volunteer (B)
returns to the room. The first volunteer (A) relates the story to (B). They then have a
conversation. Another volunteer (C) returns, and (B) relates the story to (C). This
process continues through five volunteers. The final listening volunteer (E) writes on
the board what (E) recalls of the story.
4. The volunteers are allowed to compare notes—and laugh at the distortions between
the first version of the story and the last!
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Possible story:
Bonnie Simpson, an honors senior, is running for Student Government President against Bob
Harper, a junior from Pittsburgh. My friend Mike Baker saw Bonnie at a Beta Sigma party
last Friday, and she was drunk and obnoxious. Another friend Pam told me she saw Bonnie
later that night cutting Bob apart and telling him how she was going to make a fool out of him
in the election. Dr. Cook is looking into charges filed by Bob and may force Bonnie to leave
the race. If so, I heard that Karen Piper, a senior basketball player, wants to run in her place.
(or make up your own)
Discussion/Debrief: See questions in text. This exercise could lead to a discussion on
identifying effective techniques for improving listening skills as well as a discussion on the
barriers to and importance of listening. Discuss what you can do as a listener and as a sender
to ensure the message is sent and received correctly.
You can also use this exercise to discuss the informal aspects (or grapevine) within an
organization.
Variations: This could be done with a shorter story, and/or with the entire class. Develop a
scenario based around your organization or industry.
Exercise 6–B
ACTIVE LISTENING
Purpose: To practice techniques for effective listening
Time: 30-50 min.
Resources/Set-up: Need groups of three, copy of the observation rating form (in chapter), list
of potential topics to be used (see chapter)
Activity Instructions: See chapter
Discussion/Debrief: See questions in the text. Some points worth emphasizing relative to
these questions include:
1. Behaviors that lead to effective communication and problem resolution.
2. The list of hindering factors should reinforce barriers to effective listening.
3. If the assigned position was opposite the student's actual position, some might note the
difficulty of being persuasive. Others might note how taking the opposite position
enabled them to put themselves in the other's shoes more easily—a kind of forced
empathy.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
4. It's also possible that if the topic was uninteresting or didn't resonate for the student/s,
there may have been no discernible difference on which position was taken.
5. This question can be discussed in small groups or as a large class discussion.
Exercise 6–C
TOOLS OF ACTIVE LISTENING
Purpose: To practice developing appropriate responses and use of several active listening
tools
Time: 20-30 min.
Resources/Set-up: Copy of Tools for Active Listening worksheet (in chapter)
Activity Instructions: After providing information or a lecture on active listening, this
exercise can be assigned as a homework/assessment worksheet and used to lead a discussion
of active listening tools.
Discussion/Debrief: A few areas worth clarification include:
 The first tool, empathetic response, seems simple, yet many students go too far in their
listener response. Many will respond with statements like, "you should talk to your
boss about this" or "this happened to me, too, and here's how I fixed it." Neither of
these demonstrates empathetic listening; rather they represent problem solving.
Instead, an appropriate empathetic response would be "I sense that you're upset about
being told one thing and being treated differently. That must be frustrating."
 The difference between restatement and paraphrasing. Restatement uses the speaker's
words to demonstrate you've heard what s/he has said. Paraphrasing involves your
interpretation—in your own words—of what the speaker has said. It demonstrates
you've heard and understood the speaker.
 Summative statements can be very helpful in negotiations, team meetings and
conversations in which one or more speakers have agreed to do or decide on
something. They can focus, reinforce key points, and bring closure to a discussion.
 The answers to the matching section are: 1-b, 2-f, 3-a, 4-e, 5-d, 6-c
Exercise 6–D
IMPROVING NONVERBAL OBSERVATION SKILLS
Purpose: To observe and evaluate nonverbal gestures and communication.
Time: Varies
Resources/Set-up: TV, TV/VCR if in class/group setting; large room with significant open
space
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Activity Instructions:
1. Have participants observe on TV or in everyday life how people use body movements
to convey meaning. Have them make note of:
 Facial gestures  look at eyes and eyebrows, mouths, etc.
 Arm and hand gestures
 Feet, balance and posture
 Breathing
What patterns do they pick up? Are there clusters of body movements, i.e.,
simultaneous hand, face and posture changes?
 If clusters are observed, are the components of the clusters congruent with one
another? Have them specify these behaviors. If congruence is lacking, have
them explain why this is the case and what impact this might have in
communication.
 Are the nonverbal clusters congruent with the speaker's verbal message?
Explain.
2. Have participants form dyads and have one participant stand in the middle of a room
or empty space and have the other partner walk slowly toward them. The first partner
should ask the other person to stop walking as soon as they begin to feel
uncomfortable. They should then instruct their partner to move closer or further away
until they are at a comfortable distance. This is your personal buffer zone.
 Does this zone change when different people walk toward you? Explain.
 Have them compare their notes with one or two others that have done this
exercise. Were there differences? To what can they attribute these
differences?
 Experiment with others' buffer zones. For example, stand "too close" while
waiting in line, on an elevator or in a bus. Observe that person's response to
you. (Proceed carefully…possibly with members of your own gender).
Discussion/Debrief:
 See questions in text.
 Ask participants what they learned about themselves through this exercise.
 Ask participants to discuss in small groups how their behavior and reactions in this
exercise are similar to/different from their behavior and reactions in past situations.
What role does context (e.g., work, social, public setting) play?
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Exercise 6–E
NONVERBAL ROLE PLAY
Purpose: To practice using and reading non-verbal gestures and messages
Time: Depends on the number of scenes role-played; approx. 15 mins. per scene
Resources/Set-up: Small groups of 3-5
Activity Instructions:
1. In small groups, have participants create a role-play involving only body language
with no talking. They are to pick a scene and characters and let the rest be improvised
by the members.
2. They are not to overplay the scene but rather allow the audience to guess and make
assumptions based on use of everyday nonverbal cues.
3. Have the groups present their role-play in front of the class. They may or may not set
up the scene for the audience. Allow them to play out the scene for a few minutes.
Discussion/Debrief:
 Some possible scenes (if participants can't decide) include: getting a raise, being
dumped by a boy/girlfriend, waiting for an important phone call, buying a car,
disciplining a child, bartering for goods or services, preparing an elaborate meal,
playing a game of basketball/baseball/volleyball, asking a professor for a higher grade.
More elaborate scenes may require some initial set-up discussion.
 See questions in text for the basis of discussion and debrief.
Exercise 6–F
REFLECTION/ACTION PLAN
This can be done by the participants as an assignment or they can discuss in pairs or a class
discussion can be facilitated by the Instructor.
Additional Exercises
INTERPRETING BODY LANGUAGE
Purpose: To discuss the meaning of non-verbal gestures
Time: 20-30 minutes for each
Resources/Set-up: None required
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Activity Instructions: Divide group into small groups and have them discuss the two topics
in the chapter.
Hand Gestures
Some gestures include: handshake, peace sign, hello (wave), the OK (North
American) sign, scolding with index finger, high five, stop (fingers outstretched, arm
extended, palm facing away), fist pounding on table, wringing of hands, pointing to
nose
Facial Emotions
Some feelings or messages include: fear, sadness, anger, happiness, surprise, boredom,
reassurance, "I disagree," "I don't care," "I don't like you"
Discussion/Debrief:
 How clearly interpreted were the signals? To what do you attribute this?
 How does culture influence the interpretation of hand and facial gestures?
 How much of this is unconscious to the "speaker"? To the listener?
 How can you check whether your gestures are interpreted as intended?
ELEVATING AWARNESS OF THE IMPORTANCE OF ATTENTIVE LISTENING,
see “Sharing the importance of attentive listening skills,” Thomas Clark, Journal of
Management Education, April 1999, Vol. 23, Iss.2, p216.
Additional Resources
Brooks B Kenny and Jill C Rasmussen, “Best Practices in Communications: Ten Tips for
Improving Communications and Setting the Stage for Your Success,” Public Manager 34, no.
1 (Spring 2005), pp. 19–21.
Claus Jacobs and David Coghlan, “Sound from Silence: On Listening In Organizational
Learning,” Human Relations 58, no. 1 (Jan 2005), pp. 115–138.
Max Messmer, “Communicating Effectively with Employees,” Strategic Finance 86, no. 8
(Feb 2005), pp. 15–16.
Scott Nadler and Roy L. Simerly, “The Effect of Listening on the Formation of Students Trust
and Commitment in Academic Advising: A Study at a United States University,”
International Journal of Management 23, no. 2 (June 2006), pp. 215–221.
James S. O'Rourke and Sandra D. Collins, Listening and Responding (Mason, OH: Thomson
South-Western, 2005).
J. William Pfeiffer, "Not Listening: A Dyadic Role Play," Structured Experiences Kit, locator
# C-L-2, University Associates, San Diego, CA, International Authors B.V. 1980.
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Chapter 06 - The Importance and Skill of Listening
Pfeiffer, "Listening Triads: Building Communication Skills," locator # C-L-1.
Rosemary P Ramsey and Ravipreet S Sohi, “Listening To Your Customers: The Impact of
Perceived Salesperson Listening Behavior on Relationship Outcomes,” Academy of
Marketing Science 25, no. 2 (Spring 1997) pp. 127–137.
Carl R. Rogers, On Becoming A Person, Boston, MA: Houghton Mifflin, 1961.
Robert Walsh, “Brain-friendly communication,” Training & Development, Feb 2000 v54 i2
p17.
Endnotes
R. Rowan, “Where Did That Rumor Come from?” Fortune, August 1979, p. 134, citing K. Davis,
“Management Communication and the Grapevine,” Harvard Business review, Sept-Oct 1953, p. 43.
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