Download Communication - UNC Charlotte ADVANCE

COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Think of a time when
somebody has
completely
misunderstood what
you were trying to
convey
WHAT WENT
WRONG?
The Goal of This Workshop
What is the Purpose of Communication?
 To get your message across to others clearly and
unambiguously
 It is only successful when both the sender and the
receiver understand the same information as a result of
the communication
THE COMMUNICATION PROCESS
Source
Message
Channel
Receiver
Feedback
Context
Context in Communication
 Context may include the surrounding environment or
broader culture -- power dynamics, departmental and
university culture, international cultures etc.
 It can also include your frame of mind at the time of the
interaction – are you stressed, happy etc.
 Effective communicators use the KISS ("Keep It Simple
and Straightforward") principle.
 They understand that less is often more, and that good
communication should be efficient as well as effective.
Someone Should Have Told Donald……
“There are known knowns.
These are things we know that
we know.
There are known unknowns.
That is to say, there are things
that we know we don't know.
But there are also unknown
unknowns. There are things we
don't know we don't know.”
Donald Rumsfeld, United States Secretary of
Defense, Department of Defense News Briefing, 2002
Effective Communication:
 Depends partly on your ability to convey information
clearly and simply, but also on your ability to anticipate
and eliminate sources of confusion
 Requires that you know your audience and are aware of
possible sources of miscommunication
The 7 C’s of Effective Communication
Communication should be:
 Clear
 Concise
 Concrete
 Correct
 Coherent
 Complete
 Courteous
WHY IS IT SOMETIMES SO
DIFFICULT TO GET YOUR
MESSAGE ACROSS???
Conversations Styles and Dynamics Can Differ
Dramatically, Leading to Miscommunication
One example: Direct vs Indirect Communication
Direct
Communicators
 Get to the “bottom line”
quickly.
 Don’t have much patience with
those who “beat around the
bush”
 Frequently perceived as being
“brutally honest”
 Will look you in the eye and if
you do not return the eye
contact, will assume that you
are hiding something or that
you are not to be “trusted”
Indirect
Communicators:
 All about respecting othersthey value courtesy highly
 Always seek out the polite
response.
 Hesitant to give bad news
 Find ways to avoid directly
answering a question
 Will change the subject
 To indicate disagreement, will
say “It will be difficult”
 Leave sentences unfinished
Direct Communicators have great
difficulty in comprehending Indirect
Communicators. Often, they miss the
messages entirely
To Communicate Effectively With Indirect Communicators,
Direct Communicators Need To:
• Slow down
• Learn how to be gentler when they communicate, and to discover
the power of story telling to convey meaning
• Send written documents covering issues in advance of face to face
encounters
• Carefully spell out goals and expectations in writing ahead of time
- avoid creating surprises
• Allow Indirect Communicators the necessary time to process and
craft their responses prior to face-to-face encounters
• When they are face to face, direct communicators need to learn
how to listen
Can you come up with some strategies that Indirect
Communicators could utilize when Communicating with
Direct Communicators?
Linear
Discussion is conducted in a
straight line, almost like an
outline, with the connections
among the points stated as you
move towards an end point,
which is stated explicitly
Circular
Discussion is conducted in a
circular manner, telling stories
and developing a context
around the main point, which is
often unstated because the
listener will get the point after I
give them all the information.
There is a high reliance on
context
Conversation Dynamics
 American conversation resembles a tennis or volleyball match.
You can either serve a new idea, or aim for the ball another player
just hit. You have to move quickly; someone else may get there
first.
 In contrast, Japanese conversation is like bowling. Everybody
watches respectfully and quietly and takes turns. You are not
expected to respond to the previous statement, but to aim at the
conversation goals.
The same words can mean
different things to different people,
even when they talk the "same"
language because their frames of
reference differ
People interpret everything around
them through the lens of their
personal experiences
It’s Even More Complicated When there are Language
Barriers
 A Scandinavian advertising campaign was developed
for the vacuum cleaner manufacturer, Electrolux.
 The same campaign was later used, without
modification, in the company’s American market
Cultural Differences Encompass More Than Just Language
Communication Across Cultures
 Cultures provide people with ways of thinking, seeing,
hearing, and interpreting the world
 Members of any culture often perceive their own
behavior as logical, since that behavior works for them
 People tend to accept the values of the culture around
them as absolute values
Each Culture Has Its Own Rules About Proper
Behavior
For example:
 Eye contact
 Shaking hands
 Personal Space
 Say what they mean overtly or talk around the issue
 Displays of emotion
Culture Encompasses More Than Just Race
 Age – Millennial vs Gen X
 Gender – Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars
 Power differentials – non-tenure track faculty/chair
 Dis/ability
 Sexual identity
 Socioeconomic circumstance
 Education level
 Religion and spiritual beliefs
 Personality
 Upbringing and life experiences
One Size Does NOT Fit All
 Be aware of how past experience (both yours and the
individual you are talking to) may color the
interpretation of the message you are trying to convey
 In other words – strive to be culturally competent in
your interactions with other
Learning Objectives of Cultural Competency
• Increase understanding of unconscious bias and cultural
programming.
• Examine how our cultural programming impacts how we
engage with others.
• Heighten awareness of one’s own attitudes, perceptions and
feelings regarding various aspects of diversity.
• Work on action steps toward enacting this learning in your
work environment.
@DrRNhapman
Understanding Bias
 Neuroscientists have shown
that the conscious mind
provides 5% or less of our
cognitive (conscious) activity
during the day – and 5% they
say is for the more aware
people,
 Many people operate at just
1% consciousness.
How Your Brain Processes Information
 The unconscious mind operates at 40 million bits of data per second,
whereas the conscious mind processes at only 40 bits per second
 The unconscious mind is MUCH more powerful than the conscious
mind, and it is the unconscious mind that shapes how we live our life
 Studies have shown that most of our decisions, actions, emotions and
behavior depend on the unconscious mind, which means that 95 –
99% of our life comes from the programming in our subconscious
mind
But……
The unconscious mind can process vastly more
information than our conscious mind because it
uses short cuts based on our background, cultural
environment and personal experiences to make
almost instantaneous decisions about everything
around us
 The unconscious mind is often wrong,
particularly on matters that require rational
thinking
 It uses instinct not analysis when making
decisions
How Bias Works
UNINTENDED
IMPACT
YOUR Controlled
INTENT Thinking
Filtering
Evaluation
and
Judgment
Your
Actions
INTENDED
IMPACT
YOUR
UNCONSCIOUS
BIASES
@DrRNhapman
Goal of Cultural Competency
 To move from automatic (unconscious) mode to
intentional (conscious) mode and begin to value
differences
 To do this we need to develop:
 Awareness
 Knowledge
 Skills
Awareness of your Own Biases
Project Implicit was developed as a tool to understand
attitudes, stereotypes and other hidden biases that
influence perception, judgment, and action around
numerous topics from political issues, ethnic groups and
sexual orientation to sports teams, entertainers and styles
of music
https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/education.html
Communication Across Cultures
Scenario: Expectations of Gender
Exercise
For private reflection:
 What kinds of people do you find it most difficult to
communicate with?
For group sharing:
 What do you suppose are the barriers to effective
communication with these people, on your part and on
theirs?
@DrRNhapman
Other Things to Consider When
Communicating
55% of what we communicate is based on non-verbal
behavior
38% is based on voice inflections
7% is based on vocabulary
Work on Your Body Language and Non Verbal Cues
How NOT to use nonverbal behaviors to get
your message across
The Power of Inflection
 I know the answer [no one else does]
 "I know the answer!” [all that studying paid off]
 "I know the answer?" [no, I don't]
 "I know the answer… [but what's the question?]"
These sentences have vastly different meanings, but the words
are the same – only your voice inflection has changed
Make sure you are willing to
LISTEN as much as you are
open to SPEAK
Listening
 Listening is one of the most important skills you
can acquire
 How well you listen has a major impact on your
job effectiveness, and on the quality of your
relationships with others
A Sobering Thought…….
 We forget 50% of what we hear immediately
 We forget 75% of what we hear within two months
 Of the 25% we do remember, only 60% is correct, plus
we add things that were never said in the first place
Active Listening
Hearing What People are Actually Saying
Active Listening Exercise
Instructions
Draw a triangle on top of a circle inside a rectangle. Below
and to the left of the circle draw a square and divide the
square into two parts. Draw a diamond above the
rectangle and divide it into four. Shade in two of the four
sections. To the right of the square draw two circles.
Becoming an Active Listener
 There are five key elements of active listening
 Incorporating these elements into your
communication tool kit will help to ensure that
you hear the other person, and that the other
person knows you are hearing what they say
Key Elements to Active Listening
• Pay Attention
• Show that you are Listening
• Provide Feedback
• Defer Judgment
• Respond Appropriately
1. Pay Attention
 Give the speaker your undivided attention, and acknowledge
the message
 Look at the speaker directly.
 Put aside distracting thoughts.
 Don't mentally prepare a rebuttal!
 Avoid being distracted by environmental factors e.g. side
conversations
 Recognize that non-verbal communication also "speaks"
loudly
 "Listen" to the speaker's body language
Selective Attention: Be Aware
The world deluges us with sensory information every
second. Our mind produces interpretations and models
and perceptions a mile a minute
To survive, we have to select what information we attend
to and what we remember
 Video
2. Show That You're Listening
 Use your own body language and gestures to convey
your attention.
 Nod occasionally.
 Smile and use other facial expressions.
 Note your posture and make sure it is open and
inviting.
 Encourage the speaker to continue with small verbal
comments like yes, and uh huh.
Be Cognizant of Non-Verbal Cues
 Be consistent with your verbal cues and your body
language. Do not say one thing and express something
else through your body language.
 If someone seems to be sending a double message by saying one thing and expressing something else in
their body language - ask for clarification.
3. Provide Feedback
 Our personal filters, assumptions, judgments, and beliefs
can distort what we hear. As a listener, your role is to
understand what is being said. This may require you to
reflect what is being said and ask questions
 Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing. "What I'm
hearing is," and "Sounds like you are saying”
 Ask questions to clarify certain points. "What do you mean
when you say." "Is this what you mean?”
 Summarize the speaker's comments periodically
4. Defer Judgment
•
Interrupting is a waste of time
•
It frustrates the speaker and
limits full understanding of the
message
•
Allow the speaker to finish each
point before asking questions.
•
Don't interrupt with counter
arguments.
5. Respond Appropriately
 Active listening is a model for respect and
understanding.
 You are gaining information and perspective.
 You add nothing by attacking the speaker or
otherwise putting him or her down.
 Be candid, open, and honest in your response.
 Assert your opinions respectfully.
 Treat the other person in a way that you think he or
she would want to be treated.
Repeat The Previous Exercise Using Active
Listening Skills
Remember:
 Ask questions
 Make no assumptions
This is What We Were Looking For….
Channels in Communication
Communication Channels can include:
• Verbal, including face-to-face meetings, telephone and
videoconferencing
• Written, including letters, emails, memos, and reports
• Different channels have different strengths and
weaknesses
• Choose your channel for communication wisely
Choose Your Channel Wisely!!!
Example:
How it can go south very, very quickly
Let’s Watch a Video……
The Power of Empathy In Mitigating Miscommunication
Put aside your viewpoint, and try to see things from the other person's point
of view
When you do this, you'll realize that other people most likely aren't being evil,
unkind, stubborn, or unreasonable – they're probably just reacting to the situation
with the knowledge they have.
Validate the other person's perspective
Once you "see" why others believe what they believe, acknowledge it.
Remember: acknowledgement does not always equal agreement. You can accept
that people have different opinions from your own, and that they may have good
reason to hold those opinions.
Examine your attitude
Are you more concerned with getting your way, winning, or being right? Or, is
your priority to find a solution, build relationships, and accept others? Without an
open mind and attitude, you probably won't have enough room for empathy.
Using Empathy Effectively
Listen
•
•
•
Listen with your ears – what is being said, and what tone is being used?
Listen with your eyes – what is the person doing with his or her body while
speaking?
Listen with your instincts – do you sense that the person is not
communicating something important? What do you think the other person
feels?
Ask what the other person would do
•When in doubt, ask the person to explain his or her position. This is probably the
simplest, and most direct, way to understand the other person. However, it's
probably the least used way to develop empathy.
•It's fine if you ask what the other person wants: you don't earn any "bonus points"
for figuring it out on your own.