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COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 1. SEMANTICS Definition of words Choice of words COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 2. POOR CHOICE, USE OF CHANNELS When to use certain channel Oral alone: • Simple reprimand • Settle simple dispute Written alone: • Don’t need immediate feedback • Need record COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 2. USE OF CHANNELS Both channels: • Commendation • Serious reprimand • Important policy change Nonverbal • Be aware of it. COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 3. PHYSICAL DISTRACTIONS 4. NOISE, PHYSICAL, PSYCHOLOGICAL 5. STATUS DIFFERENCE 6. EFFECTS OF EMOTIONS COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 7. PERCEPTIONS Stereotypes Halo effects Selective perception • See and hear what we expect • Ignore if conflicts with “what we know.” Projection COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 8. FILTERING, SCREENING NEGATIVE INFORMTAION 9. EVALUATING THE SOURCE 10.ABSENCE OF FEEDBACK, POOR FEEDBACK COMMON BARRIERS TO COMMUNICATION 11. INFORMATION, DATA OVERLOAD 12. POOR LISTENING LISTEN TO RESPOND LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND TO OVERCOME BARRIERS: Learn to use feedback well. Be sensitive to receiver’s point of view. Listen to UNDERSTAND! Use direct, simple language, or at least use language appropriate to the receiver. Use proper channel(s). Learn to use channels well. Learn to use supportive communication, not defensive communication. LISTENING WITH... “EXPERIENCE” “WHAT WE KNOW” BIASES STEREOTYPES PERCEPTIONS EMOTIONS LISTENING LISTEN TO RESPOND LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND 1. RESTATE/REPEAT 2. PARAPHRASE 3. REFLECT FEELING 4. PARAPHRASE CONTENT AND REFLECT FEELING 5. SAY NOTHING LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND Before I can walk in another person’s shoes, I must remove my own. Unknown LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND ASSUMES WIN-WIN 1. ASK PERMISSION 2. ESTIMTE TIME LIMIT 3. STATE BOUNDARIES STATE WHAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE 4. USE RESPECT, GENTLENESS 5. USE COURAGE LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND ASSUMES WIN-WIN HIGH X RESPECT LOW LOW COURAGE HIGH LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND ASSUMES WIN-WIN BE DIRECT BE CLEAR BE SPECIFIC BE HONEST BE RESPECTFUL BE TACTFUL TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND WHEN YOU ………………….. (State observed action.) I FEEL ………………………… (State feeling.) BECAUSE I THINK ………….. (Thought that causes the feeling.) AND I WOULD LIKE ……….. (Request for positive action.) LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND When you meet me an hour after you said you would I feel angry and hurt Because I think you don’t care much about my job demands And I would like you to call when you are going to be late. LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND YOU’RE AN HOUR LATE! YOU MAKE ME ANGRY! YOU’RE ALWAYS LATE! YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT MY TIME/FEELINGS! YOU MAKE ME SICK! NOT LISTENING? AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL RESPONSES: PROBE GIVE ADVICE EVALUATE INTERPRET UNDERSTANDING? I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN KNOW WHAT I I MEAN? HEAR YOU I’VE BEEN THERE! YOU UNDERSTAND ME? YOU HEAR WHAT I SAID? YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO? I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT. “FIXING” = LISTENING? “DON’T FEEL BAD.” “DON’T CRY.” “DON’T BE UPSET.” “YOU SAY THAT BUT YOU ALWAYS DO WELL.” Ten Rules for Good Listening Rule Listening 1. Stop talking Reasoning Behind the Rule You cannot listen if you are talking. 2. Put the person at ease Help a person feel free to talk; create a permissive environment. 3. Show the person you want to listen Look and act interested; listen to understand, not to oppose. 4.Remove distractions Don’t doodle, tap, or shuffle papers; shut the door if necessary to achieve quiet. Ten Rules for Good Listening Rule Listening Reasoning Behind the Rule 5. Empathize Try to see the other person’s point of view. 6. Be patient Allow plenty of time; do not interrupt; don’t start for the door or walk away. 7. Hold your temper An angry person takes the wrong meaning from words. Ten Rules for Good Listening Rule Listening Reasoning Behind the Rule 8.Go easy on argument and criticism Don’t put people on the defensive and cause them to “clam up” or become angry; do not argueeven if you win, you lose. 9. Ask questions This encourages a person and shows that you are listening; it helps to develop points further. 10. Stop talking This is first and last, because all other guides depend on it; you cannot listen effectively while you are talking. Source: Adapted from Human Behavior at Work, Fifth Edition, by Keith Davis. 1977. KEY CHARACTERISTICS OF SUPPORTIVE COMMUNICATION 1.Channels Congruent. Verbal and non-verbal channels must agree. Incongruent. “Oh, do I seem upset? No, everything is fine” - while obviously upset. 2.Descriptive. “This is what happened and this is how I felt about it. I’d like to suggest an alternative that would be more acceptable. Evaluative. “You are wrong for doing what you did.” 3.Problem oriented. “How can we solve this problem?” Person oriented. “Why are you so slow?” KEY CHARACTERISTICS OF SUPPORTIVE COMMUNICATION 4.Specific. “I felt like I did not get equal time to cover my material in that presentation.” Global. “You are always seeking all the recognition for our work.” 5.Owned. “I have decided to turn down your request because…” Not owned. “You have a pretty good idea, but you know how it is in this organization -- everyone can’t get everything they want.” 6.Validating. “That is an interesting suggestion.” Not validating. “I can’t believe you could think such a thing.” KEY CHARACTERISTICS OF SUPPORTIVE COMMUNICATION 7.Equality oriented. “I have some ideas, but do you have any suggestions?” Superiority oriented. “Your suggestion is dumb. This is the way to handle this problem.” 8.Flexible. “I have some questions, but let’s explore it further.” Closed-minded. “Whatever made you think that would work?” 9.Appropriately intimate. “Since we have known each other a long time, I’d like to tell you how I feel about our relationship.” Overbearing or aloof. “I know we just met, but I really need to tell you something personal.” ORGANIZATIONAL COMMUNICATION STRUCTURE SHOULD FACILITATE, NOT HINDER MANAGE INFORMATION FLOW CLIMATE INFLUENCES INTERGROUP INTERACTIONS, BARRIERS? USE GRAPEVINE COMMUNICATION NETWORKS . . . . . Y . . . . WHEEL, STAR CENTRALIZED . COMMUNICATION NETWORKS . . . . . . CIRCLE . . . . ALL CHANNEL DECENTRALIZED COMMUNICATION NETWORKS SIMPLE TASKS COMPLEX TASKS CIRCLE ALL CHANNEL Y WHEEL STAR SLOW LESS ACCURATE Y WHEEL STAR CIRCLE ALL CHANNEL FASTER MORE ACCURATE