Download Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-021 07-22-07

Attitudes and the Spiritual Life-026
08-05-07
The Enneagram and The HAM’s:
Power HAM Strategies;
The 5, 6 and 7
The 5
• Healthy Fives on the other hand find a way to enter
life, to form relationships and to make meaningful
intellectual and personal contributions.
• They cease to fear being overwhelmed by the
world and are thus able to engage it more fully.
• They cease to fear being overwhelmed by the
strength of their own emotions and therefore
develop the capacity to give and receive love.
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The 5
• Fives with a Four wing tend to be somewhat
more emotionally centered than those with a
Six wing and also tend to be more drawn to
the arts and humanities.
• This is hardly a rigid rule however.
• Fives with a Four wing tend to be attuned to
meaning and metaphor as much as to fact
and function.
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The 5
• Fives with a Six wing are often systematic thinkers
who are drawn to more analytic disciplines than
those with a Four wing.
• And they generally have an extra layer of
detachment to their personality as compared to
those with a Four wing.
• They are also more likely to be able to work within
a system or to find a place for themselves in the
world of business, academia and law than are the
more impractical Four wingers.
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The 5
• Five's are generally willing to break with
established systems of thought if their own
investigations lead in that direction.
• Thus, their thought systems are sometimes
revolutionary.
• In this regard, consider Darwin, Freud and Marx.
• Scientific revolutions were likewise inaugurated by
the the theories of Newton and Einstein, both
Fives.
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The 5
• Fives and Ones are easy to mistype as both are
focused on competency and tend to detach from
emotions under stress.
• Ones, however, are much more focused on action
and are generally more comfortable taking on
leadership roles than are most Fives.
• Ones are also generally more judgmental of what
they perceive to be rule violations or moral lapses
than are Fives who tend to adopt more of a "live
and let live" attitude when it comes to the petty
vices.
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The 5
• Intellectual Threes can sometimes mistype
or be mistyped as Fives.
• In general, Threes are more self-confident,
optimistic, image conscious and socially
competent than are Fives.
• Fives tend to be more intellectually
innovative, personally idiosyncratic, reclusive
and emotionally sensitive than Threes.
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The 5
• Fives, especially with the Four wing, sometimes
mistype as Fours.
• Such Fives recognize that they have strong
emotions and don't identify with the often
extremely cerebral portrait of type Five.
• But, Fives, unlike Fours, always retain some
degree of discomfort when it comes to the
experience and expression of their emotional
states.
• Fives tend to fear emotional overwhelm; Fours to
welcome it.
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The 5
• As Sixes are often intellectual, they sometimes
mistype or are mistyped by others as Fives.
• This is especially likely to occur if the wing is
strong.
• Sixes tend to be more grounded than Fives
however and usually form bonds with their fellow
humans more readily than do Fives.
• In addition, Sixes have a much more immediate
relationship to their emotions than do Fives whose
primary defense is detachment.
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The 5
• Fives can be self-confident, especially in their
areas of expertise and Eights can be intellectual
and more self-restrained than type descriptions
would indicate, so a mistype is possible.
• Socrates, an Eight, for instance, is frequently
mistyped as a Five, and Nietzsche, a Five, has
been mistyped as an Eight.
• But Socrates impressed others as much by his
powerful presence as by his intellect, whereas the
very sensitive Nietzsche frequently had a hard
enough time getting out of bed.
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The 5
• The mistype between Fives and Nines is a
common mistype.
• Both Nines and Fives are withdrawn types and
many Nines are intellectual, so there are some real
commonalities.
• But Nines are generally attracted to thought which
offer some sense of comfort and harmony.
• Fives, on the other hand, are frequently attracted
to what disturbs them.
• More noticeably, Nines tend to relate to a wide
variety of people easily and comfortably; this is
hardly ever the case with Fives.
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The 5
• Unhealthy Fives become overly enamored of their
own systems of thought.
• They cut themselves off from the world and from
human involvement.
• They become increasingly alienated, and even
misanthropic.
• As they become more and more ungrounded, their
thought systems take on a darker and darker tinge.
(Timothy McVeigh, Ted Kaczynski and Vladimir
Lenin)
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The Enneagram - The 5
• Human contact is so overwhelming, and life
itself is so terrifying that they try to stay
removed.
• Fives can be stingy with sharing themselves,
their emotions, and their energy.
• This gives people the mistaken impression
that they are cold and unfeeling.
• This is far from the truth, they are actually
overly sensitive.
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The Five
• Striving to be Detached:
– The desire to be autonomous, independent, and able to
find serenity with your own thoughts.
• Appraisal Belief: The world demands too much
from me and gives me too little.
• “Ultimately, the only power to which man should
aspire is that which he exercises over himself.”
Elie Wiesel(1928 - )
• The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of
power is the love of ourselves.William Hazlitt(1778
- 1830)
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The Five
• Developing My Self Concept: I learned to protect
myself from intrusive demands and being drained
of my resources by becoming private and selfsufficient.
• I do this by limiting my desires and wants and by
accumulating a lot of knowledge.
• Most powerful is he who has himself in his own
power.Seneca (5 BC - 65 AD)
• Let not thy will roar, when thy power can but
whisper.Dr. Thomas Fuller(1654 - 1734),
Gnomologia, 1732
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The Five
• My Positive Self Concept: Scholarliness. Being
knowledgeable. Thoughtfulness. Calmness in
crisis. Being respectful. Keeping confidences.
Dependability. Appreciation of simplicity.
• Self Concept Warning: Strong feelings, especially
fear. Feeling that people or circumstances are
intrusive or demanding. Feelings of inadequacy
and emptiness.
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The Five
• Appraisal Attribution: I focus on the intellectual
domain. Facts. Analysis and compartmentalized
thinking. Intrusions or demands on me.
• Appraisal Attitudes: Observing from a detached
stance. Learning all there is to know about a
subject. Thinking and analyzing in advance.
Dampening and reducing feelings. Selfcontainment, withdrawing, conserving. Maintaining
sufficient privacy, boundaries, and limits.
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The Five
• Negative Self Concept Triggers (Stress):
Failing to maintain sufficient privacy,
boundaries, and limits. Becoming fatigued.
Having desires, needs, and wants that lead
to dependency. Trying to learn everything
there is to know before taking action.
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The Five
• Temptation to Emotional Revolt: Being considered
factually incorrect. Demands, intrusions. An
overload of emotional input. Not having the
opportunity for enough private time to restore my
energy.
• My Emotional Revolt: Self-containment and
withholding. Tension and disapproval. Short bursts
of temper.
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The Enneagram - The 5
• “I have a special relationship with my
mind”
• Fives you may know: Bill Gates, Scrooge,
Buddha, T. S. Eliot, John Paul Sartre, Rene
Descartes, Timothy McVeigh, Joe DiMaggio,
Albert Einstein, H. R. Haldeman, Ted
Kaczynski, Johnny Carson, billionaires
Howard Hughes, J. Paul Getty, Bill Gates;
Jacqueline Onassis and Vladimir Lenin.
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The 5
• As Fives get healthy, they share more and
more and they do especially well when they
can share information.
• Then they can give and still have what they
give away!
• So fives can contribute beautifully to the
common good through their wisdom and
information.
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The 5
• In Batman Returns, Bruce Wayne is a
reclusive Five, who helps the world by
playing an Eight hero, Batman.
• He uses all his wonderful technology to
save the day.
• Batman is an intellectual, he and the
fiendish ones are always engaged in a
battle of wits.
• Fives like that, they win at battles of wits.
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The 5
• What Bruce Wayne does, professors do
daily - they wage war on ignorance,
barbarism, bad taste etc. in their young
charges.
• (And they just HATE those days when
students can come barging into their offices
with all sorts of sticky problems and can
stay as long as they need to...)
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The 5
• Bruce Wayne would be a Five with a Six
wing (the love of science and technology
hints at that) and he is a self-preservation
five.
• Fives with Six wings are your classical
nerds.
• Bill Gates is a Five with a Six wing (and a
strong connection to eight - he's ruthless in
his drive to amass wealth and power).
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The 5
• The Self-Preservation subtype of the Five is
usually characterized as most like a hermit.
• They are intensely sensitive, so they build extra
strong boundaries and the Self-Preservation Five
builds their boundaries physically.
• One way other people drain a Self-Preservation
Five's energy is through their expectations.
• The acute sensitivity of the SP Five senses what
the other person wants and feels obliged to
respond to their wants and expectations.
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The 5
• All Fives love privacy and none more than the SP
Five.
• All fives tend to compartmentalize their life, having
friends who do not know each other, having a
strong relationship but not thinking about that
person for long periods of time because they're
thinking about something else.
• The Self-Preservation Five tends to physically act
this out a bit more, hiding in books and removing
themselves from social engagements for long
periods.
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The 5
• Even though Self-Preservation Fives are
usually quite introverted, they can often be
pulled into a social role if that is expected of
them.
• These are the fives who can live in their
rooms for long periods of time.
• A library can be heavenly.
• Lots of quiet (enforced, too!) and lots of
information around.
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The 5
• The SP Five will have to physically isolate
him or herself in order to let strong feelings
emerge into awareness.
• Only when they are alone can they trust
these feelings not to get them into trouble.
• They must protect themselves from
invasion in the emotional realm.
• Like all SP's they tend to worry more than
the other two subtypes.
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The 5
• The Social Five
• Social Five may seem like an oxymoron, a
contradiction in terms, but Fives have their social
subtype just like all the rest of the numbers.
• In any fixation that practices detachment, the
detachment is for the sake of superiority (Power).
• The reason people withdraw is to establish
themselves as independent, not needing others.
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The 5
• Anyone who can get along without other
people feels superior to them, and
"ordinary" folk tend to look up to people who
can "go it alone."
• We often attribute great wisdom to them.
• Literature is full of wise old men or women
who live alone in the woods.
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The 5
• They spend their time thinking, while we are
practicing commerce or one of the other
mundane activities of life.
• They are spiritually superior.
• When the hermit speaks, the seeker
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The 5
• The superiority might not be entirely
intellectual.
• A Social Five, like Johnny Carson, has an
unerring sense of what needs to be laughed
at.
• Humor is distancing.
• The person making the jokes is the person
on top, in control - the person with the
Power.
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The 5
• Now, the problem for the Social Five is to be
superior while still somehow in the group.
• A common way they do this is by joining a group
that is itself superior.
• Mensa (the elite group of high IQ people to whom
you can belong if you can prove you have a 140
IQ or better) was probably started by a 5.
• At any rate, IQ scores measure what Fives do
best.
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The 5
• They love to belong to a group that shares
superior information.
• The ideal job for a Social Five is editor of a
newsletter that only goes to 32 people, and
these 32 people are the only people in the
world in this field of high level arcane
research.
• And they never meet, they only
communicate through the newsletter.
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The 5
• The Social Five does not care what the
“everybody” thinks, but they are intensely
concerned about their position in the elite
group.
• The question is what do the people who
matter think?
• Social Fives are often a bit more
extroverted than the other two subtypes, but
the extroversion usually shows up when
they are dealing with information.
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The 5
• Social Fives can work within an
organization or community, but they require
a lot of autonomy.
• The faculty member who fusses and fumes
over all the paperwork and social
obligations of teaching, who resents faculty
meetings, but nevertheless wants to be
invited to a symposium on marine
microbiology as an expert could easily be a
Social Five.
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The 5
• The autonomy is also for the sake of selfsufficiency.
• When you combine self-sufficiency with
distance, you get hierarchy.
• Not necessarily a political hierarchy, but a
hierarchy of whose opinions are the most
valuable.
• In an organization, fives can work with
others, but a private office is pure gold.
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The 5
• Fives often flourish in academia where
intellectual prowess is valued, where
research is valued more highly than
teaching, where bureaucracies are kept at
arms length by tradition or policy and where
one's social needs can be met by
exchanging information.
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The 5
• This exchange can be in the form of
teaching, but it can also be sharing
research or publishing.
• The function of the group is not so to
provide support or pleasant companionship,
it serves rather to establish identity.
• The Social Five is concerned about where
he or she stands in the group.
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The 5
• Is their work, their intelligence, adequately
respected?
• Respect is more important than love; respect
means power, love only means appreciation.
• This can flip, however.
• If a Social Five cannot achieve independence,
they may become abjectly concerned about their
relationships, especially romantic and family
relationships.
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The 5
• Social Fives will probably be friendly.
• They feel distant, not hostile.
• So if you have something real to talk to
them about, they will be fine
conversationalists.
• But they don't like small talk and you can
see them fade from the conversation.
• Actually, what you feel is yourself fading
from their view.
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The 5
• They can be fierce snobs.
• Civilized, proper, but several steps above the
mundane and ordinary, especially in the quality of
their information and their judgments about
complex matters.
• Like all of us, Sexual Fives are polarized about a
central issue.
• The central issue for Five is boundaries.
• They are protective of their boundaries because
they are hypersensitive.
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The 5
• Sexual Fives tend to remember brief,
intimate, torrid love affairs forever.
• They are replayed in the mind and are
always a source of emotional charge.
• Rehearse and replay are general Five
characteristics.
• The Sexual subtype chooses intimacy as
the content of his rehearse and replay.
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The 5
• Sexual Fives can have deeply intimate
relationships without romance.
• One can be a behind-the-scenes advisor and
confidant.
• Fives would have no trouble advising the
president of the firm and having a profound love
affair with him and never letting those two worlds
meet.
• They can compartmentalize with great ease.
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The 5
• When an intimate Five has shared deeply, they
can go for long periods of time without
communication.
• They are like camels that drink deeply of intimacy
and then go for weeks without drinking again.
• Emotional experiences "keep" in the Five's
retentive mind, so they don't have to enter the
outside world for more experiences.
• What's wrong with the one I have in my mind?
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The 5
• Chernick notes that "The Five tendency to
keep emotionally-charged relationships
separated from each other lends itself to a
kind of lust for intense, brief, highly
meaningful encounters."
• Keep in mind how mental the Five is.
• Their way of making contact is through
information.
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The 5
• That's why we have so many professorial
Fives.
• They may be totally unknown to their
students, but the professor is sharing
themselves when they share their ideas.
• Now transfer this to an intimate setting.
• When a Five starts to share themselves,
they will lead with information.
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The 5
• Now the information is intimate.
• It won't be small talk, it will be thoughtful, detailed
and will be information that tells you about their
inner self.
• In sex, lies and video tape, James Spader gets
his friend's wife to talk about sex almost
immediately.
• No small talk, no information about extraneous
matters.
• He wants intimate information.
• And when he gets it, he is turned on.
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The Sexual Five
• James Spader plays a Sexual subtype Five.
• You can notice the pronounced polarity.
• On the one hand, he is close mouthed,
uncommunicative and seeking privacy, like any
Five.
• On the other hand, he is alone with his friend's
wife (Andi McDowell) for only minutes and he is
talking extremely intimately with her.
• They discuss sex clinically, like a good Five would
like, but it is also more than clinically.
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The Sexual Five
• This is the polarity in a Sexual Five.
• Tom Condon remarks they can "go from
enigmatic, deliberate distance to intense
unguarded openness.”
• This flip flop is an indication of the Five's
ambiguous feelings about boundaries.
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The Sexual Five
• It is precisely because they reveal themselves so
totally that they keep such high fences.
• In sex, lies and videotapes, the very Fivish
Spader gets women to reveal secrets.
• That's the currency of intimacy for the Sexual
subtype of Five.
• Intimate Fives don't share intimately with more
than one or two persons.
• Key disclosures are the centerpiece of the
relationship.
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The Sexual Five
• What Fives lack in breadth they make up in
depth and they share totally with one or at
the most two people.
• (Their sexual sharing is very complete and
can become a little kinky as they explore
how much can be shared).
• However, sexual sharing is usually
accompanied by sharing of inner feelings
and thoughts - especially thought.
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