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WRITING SKILLS
A CARP PIE in practice
Above, high in the sky, floated a hot air balloon. Fearfully, one of the occupants was
wondering what might happen if there were a storm. He searched for land. Waiting,
he listened to Eminem on his MP3. Bradley,, who was on his first flight, suddenly
needed the toilet. Desperate and anxious, he searched around for a hole in the bottom
of the basket.
In weaker writing, sentences mostly begin with a noun, or the definite article (The);
verbs are also often connected by and, then, or so. Use A CARP PIE to gain more
marks by making your sentences more interesting – either by varying the way you
begin the sentence, or by using punctuation or a relative pronoun to change the middle
of the sentence.
A is for adverbs
An adverb is a word which describes a verb (eg fast, slowly, well) It usually
describes how or when the verb is being done.
Teacher’s example: Greedily, Jake ate the jelly baby.
My example: to the toilet.
C is for connectives (conjunctions)
Use words/phrases such as While, As, During, Before, After, Although, As if, As long
as, As though, Because, If, In case, Once, Since, Though, Until, Unless, When,
Whenever, Where, Wherever, While to begin sentences.
Teacher’s example: Although Geoffrey jumped carefully, he failed to land on Mr
Curley’s car.
My example:
A is for adjectives
Pair two adjectives together at the start of a sentence, usually linked by ‘and’ or
‘but’.
Teacher’s example: Weary and anxious, Michael trudged off the pitch.
My example: ------------ but ----------- Jack finally stopped talking.
R is for relative pronouns
The main relative pronouns are who, which and that.
Who is used for people.
Which and that are used for animals and things.
Teacher’s example: Alistair, who was complaining bitterly, came last.
My example: Mrs Miles, who has an incredibly small brain, was trying to help
me with my English.
P is for prepositions
A preposition is a word or group of words linking a noun to the rest of the sentence,
often indicating place or position.
Teacher’s example: Behind the door lurked a large jelly baby.
My example:
P is for punctuation
An easy, simple and efficient way to gain extra marks - in SATs and GCSE - is to use
a range of punctuation:
Colon (:) means a list or an example is to follow.
Teacher’s example: Jane had a good time at the party. She ate: six doughnuts, 15 fairy
cakes, six sausages and nine jelly babies.
My example:
Semi colon (;) means hold in your mind what I have just said because here is some
more information which is linked, but which would be too much in one long sentence.
A semi-colon joins two verbs; it can often replace the word ‘and’.
Teacher’s example: Jordan entered the room with a smile; behind him staggered
Sophie carrying all his bags - and his lunchbox.
My example:
Dash (-) emphasises the words after the dash.
Teacher’s example: Tom often dozed off in English lessons - until his chair collapsed.
My example:
A pair of dashes (- -) emphasises the words between the dashes.
Teacher’s example: Hannah hunted hopelessly in her bag - bulging as usual with
make-up and fashion magazines - for her English homework.
My example:
Ellipsis (…) some words are missing.
Teacher’s example: Laura proudly entered the room, carrying… a jellyfish.
My example:
So I must use at least 5 different types of punctuation - including full stops and
commas - in writing tasks.
I is for –ing words
The –ing word must be a verb; it is called a present participle.
Teacher’s example: Uncaring, Greg started to lob jelly babies at the girl’s window.
Grabbing the… , Greg…. the room.
My example:
E is for –ed words.
Teacher’s example: Flabbergasted, Johnny watched helplessly as Steve ate a jelly
baby from the legs up.
My example:
Highlight in a piece of English writing every sentence you have started with a noun or The.
Using A CARP PIE, rewrite three of them, each with a different opening, or combining two previous sentences
(by using a relative pronoun or a semi-colon).
Now find two places where you can vary your punctuation, using a colon, dash, dashes, or ellipsis.
Taking a piece of writing from another subject, find a sentence beginning with a noun and change it using A
CARP PIE.
Remember: use A CARP PIE to improve your writing - whatever the subject!