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Communicating with Others Chapter 10 Communication – any means by which you share a message with another person • Words, gestures, a combination of the two may be used. You may choose to write your message. • We are a part of the “communications generation.” New technology is changing our means of communicating everyday. • Even with all the technology available, we still must be able to communicate in a clear concise manner that is easily understood. Poor communication accounts for many misunderstandings among friends, family members, and even among nations. Communication involves a sender and a receiver. Sender – transmits the message in a variety of ways. Receiver – hears and interprets the message. A message may be hard to understand if the sender does not send clear accurate and complete messages. The receiver needs skills in listening and interpreting the message. Forms of Communication • Verbal Communication – uses words (writing, emailing, texting, speaking) • Nonverbal Communication – uses factors other than words (gestures, facial expressions, eye contact, and body movements) Word of Caution! • You may not always be aware of the nonverbal messages you are sending, but those around you may still receive nonverbal messages from you. Listening • Listening skills are just as important as skills in sending messages. • The way in which a person listens affects the quality of conversation. • Good listeners can lead others into deeper conversation. • Active Listening – nod, smile, eye contact or any other indication that a message has been received. • Active listening encourages further communication. • Feedback – communicating to the other person how you feel about what was said Passive listening – taking in words and offering no sign of hearing or understanding of the message being sent. • The sender gets the message that it isn’t worth trying to continue the conversation. • Further communication is likely to be cut off. Other types of negative communication/listening • Careless listeners – pick out bits and pieces of conversation and don’t listen to the rest. This selective listening often causes people to take words out of context. • Narrow listeners – hear only what they want to hear. • Defensive listeners – read hostile meanings into what is being said. They have negative feelings because they think they’re being attacked. Listening cont’d. • Listening is a skill that can be developed. • If there seems to be a misunderstanding, it is helpful to repeat what you’ve heard. This allows the sender to clarify the message. • It is important to listen to the entire message. Empathy v. Sympathy (Em – in) (Sym – with) (pathos – feeling) • Empathy – the process of seeing things from another person’s point of view. • You understand how that person feels and why, without necessarily sharing those feelings at the same time. • Sympathy – I feel as you do. • Sympathy is sometimes resented. • Empathy is more likely to be appreciated and helpful. Nonverbal Communication – Body Language • Drumming Fingers and swinging legs = tension • Smiling and nodding = enthusiasm • Steepling fingers = authority and control • Face to face contact = desire to communicate • Folded arms, movement away from and turning away = barriers to communication Body Language cont’d. • In peak communication, eye contact is maintained continually Cultural Influences on Communication • People from various cultures have characteristic patterns of nonverbal communication. • Some stand closer to each other, some use their hands more often, demonstrations of affection are different, and some cultures are more reserved. Your Appearance • People form first impressions and lasting images of you according to the way you look. • If you want to create a good impression, you should project a positive image. • Not everyone is beautiful or handsome, but everyone can be well-groomed. • Good grooming habits show you care about yourself and other people’s opinions of you. • Even good quality clothing can create a poor impression if it is soiled or wrinkled Your Appearance cont’d. • Your posture is a clue to your personality. • Slumped shoulders, bowed head, eyes on floor = wants to go unnoticed • Lifted chin, squared shoulders = confidence • Employers have the right to demand certain standards of grooming as they evaluate job applicants.