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STATE STANDARDS
2.1 Explain the communication process.
2.2 Demonstrate appropriate uses of verbal and
nonverbal communication.
2.3 Explain the levels of communication.
2.4 Demonstrate communication skills that
contribute to positive relationships in the family,
workplace and community.
DEVELOPING EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION
SKILLS
JOURNAL
List if the following places use formal or informal
communication:
 Church
 Home
 School
 Gym
 Court

ACTIVITY

Get into 4 groups and play a short game of
Charades.
THE COMMUNICATION PROCESS
Communication is an exchange of information
between two or more people.
 Need at least 2 people

A) sender-transmits or sends the message
 B) receiver-hears and interprets the message

*Sender needs skills in sending clear and accurate
messages.
*Receiver needs skills in listening to the message and
interpreting it correctly.
-should have a shared meaning about the message-
THE COMMUNICATION PROCESS
Message
Sender
Interpretation
Feedback
Receiver
TYPES OF COMMUNICATION
Nonverbal communication is a way of sending
and receiving messages without using words.
(body movements, such as facial expressions, eye
contact, and gestures)
 Verbal communication is the use of words to send
and receive messages. (speaking and writing)


What are some examples of nonverbal
communication?
NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Nonverbal communication helps you understand
other’s emotions. Ex. Frown, or Smile (sadhappy)
 Body language involves sending messages
through body movements.
 It can communicate different messages to people
of different cultures or backgrounds. -May be
viewed as positive by some people and negative
by others.
 Nonverbal messages can reinforce or contradict
what you say. Ex. Warm hug can reinforce the
message “I love you.” Crossing your arms and
turning away can contradict the same message.

CON’T
Facial Expressions can communicate a wide
range of emotions to others.
 Raised eyebrows can lead to think that you are
questioning the message.
 A dull, bored expression tells others you are not
interested.
 Looking directly at someone with a pleasant
expression shows your interest in
communicating.
 Direct eye contact helps convey a message that
you can and are interested in what a person has
to say.

CON’T
Gestures help communicate their message more
clearly.
 Ex. Waving arms and shaking fist while talking.

Body motions are the way you sit, stand, or walk
while communicating that sends messages to
others.
 Sitting forward in a chair shows that you are
alert and listening; slouching back shows
disinterest.
 Crossing your legs conveys a relaxed feeling.

NONVERBAL GESTURES
Gestures:
Tap fingers
 Lifted eyebrow
 Rub nose or pull on ear
 Sweating palms, white knuckles
 Folded arms
 Swinging or crossing legs
 Wringing hands, kicking ground
 Steeple hands
 Feet on desk

VERBAL COMMUNICATION SKILLS
The words you use and the way you use them to
express yourself are influenced by your
environment. -informal or formal
 Listening to others adds to your vocabulary.
 Regions where you live influence the way you
speak. (southern talk)
 The way you say things, can have certain
meaning.
 Ex. Tone (demonstration)

DEVELOPING EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION
SKILLS

Activity A/Chapter 5-page 39
JOURNAL WRAP-UP

When are appropriate settings to use verbal and
non-verbal communication? In your own words,
what is verbal and non-verbal communication?
EXPRESSING YOURSELF
Using I-statements to express your thoughts,
feelings, and ideas can help you speak for
yourself-from your point of view.
 I-statements help you through difficult
situations.






Descriptive-”I See”
Thought-”I Think”
Feeling-”I Feel”
Intention-”I Want”
Action-”I Will Do”
I-MESSAGES
“I” messages.
 Focus on behaviors rather than the person.
 Focus on facts, not judgments (“You don’t really
care how I feel about the dishes” or “What kind of
person would leave dirty dishes all over”).
 Don’t exaggerate. “I always pick up after you”.
 Don’t tell what to do, simply offer alternative.
Nobody likes to be told what to do.
 Respond the best way for you partner. Anger
may shut them down.
 Don’t overload.
 Appropriate time and place.

EXPRESSING YOURSELF
Avoid You-Statements.
 “You are so dumb!” “You should apologize to me.”
“You should really tell her how YOU feel.”
 You-Statements attack the person, not the
problem.
 YOU MESSAGES are totally ineffective because
they contain language that sounds abrasive,
judgmental, condescending, or injurious to the
self-esteem of the person confronted.

YOU MESSAGES ARE NEVER WELL
RECEIVED FOR SEVERAL REASONS:
They make people feel guilty
 They can be interpreted as blame, put downs,
criticism and rejections.
 They communicate a lack of respect for others.
 They often cause reactive or retaliatory behavior.
 They damage the recipients self-esteem.
 They cause resistance rather the openness to
change.
 They can make a person fell hurt, the resentful.
 They are often perceived as punitive.

PASSIVE LISTENING
When people just take in messages, they are
using passive listening.
 Just hearing words without always listening for
meanings.
 No response
 The person doesn’t smile, nod, or comment.

ACTIVE LISTENING
You can be more certain that you are interpreting
a message clearly when you use active listening.
 Feedback is important. It shows that you are
being an active listener and shows that you care
about communication skills.
 Checking out means using questions to clarify a
message.
 “Did you say that his car wrecked?” “Where did
you say this happened?”
 Reflecting is repeating the message in your own
words to ensure the sender that you understand
the message.

FIRST STEP TO GOOD LISTENING
IS TO “SHUT UP”

Take 5 minutes to read the poem entitled
“Listen.”
LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION
ACTIVITY

Play a game of taboo to demonstrate the different
types of communication, verbal, non-verbal, imessages, etc.
MISPERCEPTION
ROADBLOCKS &
MISCOMMUNICATION
Placates: Agreeable, appeases others, a pleaser.
 Blamers: Superior. Doesn’t listen and tries to
escape responsibilities.
 Distracters: Frenetic and seldom says anything
relevant, changes the subject.

ROADBLOCKS & MISCOMMUNICATION
Interrupting – breaking into the conversation,
not giving the other a chance to finish.
 Endless fighting – bring up things from the
past & never resolving things.
 Character assassination – name calling,
belittling, insulting remarks.
 Calling in reinforcements – involve outsiders
to support you.
 Withdrawal – leave, indifference, silent
treatment.
 Need to be right – refusal to admit their part in
the problem.

WHY PEOPLE DON’T
COMMUNICATE
Ashamed or guilty of feelings
 Fearful feelings will create conflict
 Suppress unacceptable feelings
 Deny our feelings to self


All of these problems can contribute to
negative relationships in the family,
workplace and community.
ATTITUDE CHANGES ESSENTIAL
FOR ACTIVE LISTENING
You must want to hear what the other person has
to say.
 You must genuinely be able to accept the other
person’s feelings, no matter how different they
are from your own.
 You must view people separate from yourself,
with alternative ways of perceiving the world.
 You must trust the other person’s capacity to
handle and find solutions to his/her own
problems.

EVALUATION OF THE LISTENER
Eye to eye contact & looks interested
 Passive encouraging statements
 Clarifies for understanding
 Relevant questions
 Reflects back what they said
 No interruptions
 Validates – never discredits their feelings
 Appropriate feedback
 Problem solving if necessary (only if asked for)

ACTIVITY: DRAWING BUGS
I am going to describe a drawing I have made of a
bug. Without seeing the drawing, you are to
draw the bug that I describe. You may not ask
questions or talk to each other.
 Get out a sheet of paper.

CONFLICT
Conflict occurs when any two people disagree on
some issue.
 Conflict resolution is one skill that can help you
resolve conflicts in a positive way.

IDENTIFY THE PROBLEM

Steps in resolving a conflict.
1st step: resolving a conflict is to identify the real
issue. What is causing the conflict? -Use istatements and active listening to help identify the
problem.
 2nd step: Identify Who Owns the Problem: Problem
Ownership, whom does the problem affect?
 3rd step: Accept Ownership of the Problem:
accepting ownership of the problem is the next step
in resolving the situation.
 4th step: Solve the problem, and once you take
ownership of a specific problem, you can take steps to
solve the problem. Decision-making process can be
applied to solve the problem.

SOLVING THE PROBLEM
1.) Identify the problem.
 2.) Identify the alternative solutions.
 3.) Evaluate the alternatives.
 4.) Choose the best solution.
 5.) Implement the solution.
 6.) Evaluate the solution. Was it effective in
solving the problem?

NEGOTIATION
Negotiation is a communication process in which
people alternate between sending and receiving
messages.
 When both people own the problem, they may
need to negotiate in each stage of the problemsolving process.
 Reaching an agreeable solution is not always
easy. One-sided thinking can hinder negotiation.
 Good listening skills are needed when
negotiating a solution.

COMPROMISE
Compromise is a give-and-take method that
allows both people to express themselves.
 No one person wins or loses.
 Compromise protects and helps maintain each
person’s self-esteem.
 Each person recognizes the worth of the other’s
opinions, feelings, and desires.
 People who feel accepted and more likely to work
toward an agreeable solution.
