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SLB-051 03/04/07 Thinking and Communicating “The Spiritual Life is Thinking!” (R.B. Thieme, Jr.) Think • 1 Cor 14:20 (2) Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature. SLB 2006 SLB-051 2 Think • Definition | Concise Oxford English Dictionary • think • v. (past and past part. thought) • 1 have a particular opinion, belief, or idea about someone or something. SLB 2006 SLB-051 3 Think • Definition | Concise Oxford English Dictionary • think • 2 use one’s mind actively to form connected ideas about someone or something. • † have a particular mental attitude. • † (think of/about) take into account or consideration. • † (think of/about) consider the possibility or advantages of. • † (think of) call to mind. • 3 (think of) have a specified opinion of. SLB 2006 SLB-051 4 Think • Rom 12:3 For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. SLB 2006 SLB-051 5 Think • Phil 3:15 Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. SLB 2006 SLB-051 6 Think • 27.4 εἰς ἐπίγνωσιν ἔρχομαιa: (an idiom, literally ‘to come into knowledge’) to acquire information about something, with emphasis upon the process involved—‘to learn about, to find out, to come to know.’ • ὃς πάντας ἀνθρώπους θέλει σωθῆναι καὶ εἰς ἐπίγνωσιν ἀληθείας ἐλθεῖν ‘who wants all people to be saved and to learn the truth’ 1 Tm 2.4. It is also possible to treat the phrase εἰς ἐπίγνωσιν ἔρχομαι as meaning ‘to come to know’ in the sense of ‘to come to understand’. SLB 2006 SLB-051 7 Think • 27.5 ὁράωf; συνοράωa: to acquire information, with focus upon the event of perception—‘to learn about, to find out about.’ • ὁράωf: ἐραύνησον καὶ ἴδε ὅτι ἐκ τῆς Γαλιλαίας προφήτης οὐκ ἐγείρεται ‘search and learn that from Galilee no prophet ever arises’ Jn 7.52. • συνοράωa : συνιδόντες κατέφυγον εἰς τὰς πόλεις τῆς Λυκαονίας ‘when they learned about it, they fled to cities in Lycaonia’ Ac 14.6. SLB 2006 SLB-051 8 Think • 27.6 ἀφοράωb: to acquire information, with focus presumably upon the source of such information—‘to learn about, to find out about.’ τοῦτον μὲν οὖν ἐλπίζω πέμψαι ὡς ἂν ἀφίδω τὰ περὶ ἐμὲ ἐξαυτῆς ‘I hope to send him (to you), then, as soon as I can learn how things are going to turn out for me’ Php 2.23. SLB 2006 SLB-051 9 Think • 27.7 καθοράω: to acquire definite information, and with focus upon the process of perception— ‘to learn about, to perceive clearly.’ • τὰ γὰρ ἀόρατα αὐτοῦ ἀπὸ κτίσεως κόσμου τοῖς ποιήμασιν νοούμενα καθορᾶται ‘for since the creation of the world, his invisible qualities have been clearly perceived, being understood from what has been made’ Ro 1.20.3 SLB 2006 SLB-051 10 Think • 27.8 ἐπιγινώσκωc: to acquire information, probably in a somewhat more exact or detailed form and perhaps with focus upon what is learned (compare 27.2)—‘to learn about, to find out about.’ ἐπιγνοῦσα ὅτι κατάκειται ἐν τῇ οἰκίᾳ τοῦ Φαρισαίου ‘she found out that he was eating in the Pharisee’s house’ Lk 7.37; ἐπέγνωμεν ὅτι Μελίτη ἡ νῆσος καλεῖται ‘then we learned that the island was called Malta’ Ac 28.1. SLB 2006 SLB-051 11 Think • ἐπιγινώσκωc also occurs in legal contexts referring to careful investigation and interrogation: εἴπας μάστιξιν ἀνετάζεσθαι αὐτὸν ἵνα ἐπιγνῷ δἰ ἣν αἰτίαν οὕτως ἐπεφώνουν αὐτῷ ‘he told them to whip him to ascertain why they (the Jews) were screaming like this against him’ • Ac 22.24; βουλόμενός τε ἐπιγνῶναι τὴν αἰτίαν δἰ ἣν ἐνεκάλουν αὐτῷ κατήγαγον εἰς τὸ συνέδριον αὐτῶν ‘I wanted to find out what they were accusing him of, so I took him down to their Council’ Ac 23.28.4 SLB 2006 SLB-051 12 Think • 27.9 ἀκριβόω: to acquire information in an exact and accurate manner or to acquire information which is exact and accurate—‘to learn exactly, to find out accurately, to ascertain.’ τότε Ηρῴδης λάθρᾳ καλέσας τοὺς μάγους ἠκρίβωσεν παῤ αὐτῶν τὸν χρόνον τοῦ φαινομένου ἀστέρος ‘so Herod called the visitors from the east to a secret meeting and from them found out exactly what time the star had appeared’ Mt 2.7 SLB 2006 SLB-051 13 Think • 31.1 φρονέωc; κρίνωd; λογίζομαιc; ἡγέομαιa; ἔχωc: to hold a view or have an opinion with regard to something—‘to hold a view, to have an opinion, to consider, to regard.’ • φρονέωc : ἐγὼ πέποιθα εἰς ὑμᾶς ἐν κυρίῳ ὅτι οὐδὲν ἄλλο φρονήσετε ‘our union in the Lord makes me confident that you will not take a different view’ Ga 5.10. SLB 2006 SLB-051 14 Think • 31.8 πλανάω; πλάνηa, ης f: (figurative extensions of meaning of πλανάω ‘to cause to wander off the path,’ not occurring in the NT) to cause someone to hold a wrong view and thus be mistaken—‘to mislead, to deceive, deception, to cause to be mistaken.’2 • πλανάω: βλέπετε μή τις ὑμᾶς πλανήσῃ ‘watch out, and do not let anyone deceive you’ Mt 24.4; πλανῶντες καὶ πλανώμενοι ‘deceiving others and being deceived themselves’ 2 Tm 3.13. SLB 2006 SLB-051 15 Think • πλάνηa : ἐκ τούτου γινώσκομεν τὸ πνεῦμα τῆς ἀληθείας καὶ τὸ πνεῦμα τῆς πλάνης ‘this is the way we know the difference between the Spirit which leads to truth and the spirit that misleads us’ or ‘ … causes us to hold a wrong view’ or ‘ … causes us to be mistaken’ 1 Jn 4.6. • To mislead people as to proper views which they should have may often be expressed idiomatically, for example, ‘to twist people’s thoughts,’ ‘to cause what is false to seem like what is true,’ ‘to make a lie appear true,’ ‘to dig away the truth,’ or ‘to cover the eyes with lies.’ SLB 2006 SLB-051 16 Think • 31.33 ἐκζήτησις, εως f: to form ideas which are unrelated to reality, normally with a negative connotation—‘speculation, worthless speculation, imaginings.’ • αἵτινες ἐκζητήσεις παρέχουσιν ‘these promote worthless speculations’ 1 Tm 1.4. It is also possible to understand ἐκζήτησις in 1 Tm 1.4 as meaning ‘controversies’ or ‘arguments’ (see 33.442). SLB 2006 SLB-051 17 Think • 30.17 ἀναβαίνω ἐπὶ καρδίαν: (an idiom, literally ‘to arise in the heart’) to begin to think about something—‘to begin to think, to think, to have a thought occur to someone.’ • ἐπὶ καρδίαν ἀνθρώπου οὐκ ἀνέβη ‘what no one ever thought could happen’ 1 Cor 2.9. SLB 2006 SLB-051 18 Know • 2 Pet 3:17 You therefore, beloved, knowing this beforehand, take care that you are not carried away with the error of lawless people and lose your own stability. SLB 2006 SLB-051 19 Understanding Effective Communication • “CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS: TOOLS FOR TALKING WHEN STAKES ARE HIGH is a book by four cofounders of a corporate consulting firm who present their formula for effective communication. • The book is based on the trial and error of years spent as corporate trainers made from observing literally thousands of people from all walks of life, as well as employees across major industries.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 20 Understanding Effective Communication • TOOLS FOR TALKING WHEN STAKES ARE HIGH • For Believers, the Stakes are Always High: • 1. My Witness to All • 2. My Ministry to the Few • 3. My Godliness to the One SLB 2006 SLB-051 21 Understanding Effective Communication • “What the authors found among certain people was a willingness to speak up when they objected, addressing issues head-on rather than giving the silent treatment, and diving into potentially risky discussions without fear.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 22 Understanding Effective Communication • “Underneath these topics run the same main point - think twice before speaking. • Care and thought are needed to make a crucial conversation work.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 23 Understanding Effective Communication • “‘Crucial’ conversations are interpersonal exchanges at work or at home, that we dread having but know we cannot avoid. How do you say what needs to be said while avoiding an argument? Day-to-day conversations and interactions affect your life. Crucial conversations can have a profound impact on your career, your happiness, and your future.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 24 Understanding Effective Communication • “When stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong, you have three choices: • Avoid a crucial conversation and suffer the consequences; • handle them poorly and suffer the consequences; or • handle them well … and discover how to communicate when it matters the most.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 25 Understanding Effective Communication • “If you normally handle tense situations by running the other way, screaming or slamming the door, this book will help you develop constructive habits that will leave you feeling better about yourself. With the skills, you learn in this book, you'll never have to agonize about the outcome of a crucial conversation again.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 26 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 1: Start with Heart • Stay focused on what you really want and maintain dialogue. • Learn what dialogue is and how to work on me first. • Understand how motives change when conversations turn crucial. SLB 2006 SLB-051 27 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 2: Learn to Look • Spot the warning signs that indicate safety is at risk. • Notice various forms of silence and violence. • Take steps to rebuild safety and return to dialogue. • Step out of a conversation and notice how to make it work. • Identify your own Style Under Stress™ and manage it. SLB 2006 SLB-051 28 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 3: Make It Safe • Talk about almost anything—without silence and violence. • Increase candor and decrease defensiveness • Use specific skills to keep everyone sharing information. • Establish and maintain mutual purpose and mutual respect. • Recognize when you are at cross-purposes. SLB 2006 SLB-051 29 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 4: Master My Stories • Stay in dialogue and learn how to master emotions that destroy dialogue when you are angry, scared, or hurt—“think” your way to the root cause of negative emotions. • Discover your stories—how do you justify your behavior? • Eliminate victim, villain, and helpless stories, and improve your results. SLB 2006 SLB-051 30 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 5: STATE My Path • Speak persuasively, not abrasively. • Get your meaning across even with potentially threatening messages. • Share strong opinions without shutting down contrary views. • State your mind while making it safe for others to do the same. SLB 2006 SLB-051 31 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 6: Explore Others’ Paths • Use exploring skills to make it safe for others to speak up. • Diffuse others’ violence and eliminate silence keep listening when others blow up or clam up. • Encourage others to share issues they fear bringing up. • Get safely to the meaning behind others’ emotions. SLB 2006 SLB-051 32 Understanding Effective Communication • Principle 7: Move to Action • Put Crucial Conversations principles and skills together. • Learn how to make decisions and improve accountability • Move from healthy dialogue to taking action and achieving results. SLB 2006 SLB-051 33 Understanding Effective Communication • This guidebook provides an approach to those conversations in life that are both difficult and necessary. • The authors give you the tools you need to step up to life's difficult and important conversations, say what's on your mind, and achieve positive outcomes. SLB 2006 SLB-051 34 Understanding Effective Communication • By outlining specific strategies that can create mutual respect and understanding, they seek to open channels of communication, which would otherwise remain barred SLB 2006 SLB-051 35 Understanding Effective Communication • “The techniques are geared toward getting people to lower their defenses, creating mutual respect and understanding, increasing emotional safety, and encouraging freedom of expression. • Among other things, readers also learn about the factors that characterize crucial conversations, and the technique that prepares them to work through any high impact situation with confidence.” SLB 2006 SLB-051 36 Understanding Effective Communication • Thinking - thinking refers to the process of creating a structured series of connective transactions between items of perceived information. SLB 2006 SLB-051 37 Understanding Effective Communication • Metacognition - metacognition refers to awareness and control of one's thinking, including commitment, attitudes and attention. • Metacognition: a dimension of thinking that involves knowledge and control of self and knowledge and control of process. SLB 2006 SLB-051 38