Download JEWISH MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE

JEWISH MARRIAGE
Kiddushin
• Is the Hebrew word for marriage
• It means sanctification/holiness
• Marriage is a sacred relationship, a
setting apart.
Purpose of Marriage
• Companionship
• Propagation
• Establishing the family as the basic social unit
“When a husband unites with his wife in
holiness, the divine presence abides with
them.” (Talmud Bavli Sotah 17a).
• According to the Talmud (Yevamot 62B) ‘a
man without a wife is incomplete, and cannot
experience true goodness’.
• Sex is permissible only within the context of
a marriage.
In Judaism,
• sex is not merely a way of experiencing
physical pleasure.
• It is an act of immense significance, which
requires commitment and responsibility.
• The requirement of marriage
before sex ensures that sense
commitment and responsibility.
Jewish law also forbids
• sexual contact short of
intercourse outside of
the context of marriage,
• recognizing that such
contact will inevitably
lead to intercourse.
Jewish law says
• that a man commits himself to three major
obligations in marriage: He owes his wife
• food,
• clothing, and
• sex.
Indeed in Judaism, the ideal time for
sexual relations is on
The Shabbat
• Thus emphasising the holiness of the sexual act
when performed with the proper attitude and
intent.
Since marital relations are a mitzvah,
• Jewish law also details the
frequency of sex in the
marriage, based on the
man’s profession!
Talmud prescribed minimum schedule
for sexual relations based on a man’s
profession.
• For men of independent means,
every day.
• Donkey drivers, once a week.
• Camel drivers, once every thirty days.
• For sailors, once every six months.
The legal code also states
If someone originally worked in a
trade near his home, which put him in
a category of those expected to have
greater frequency of sexual relations,
and he wanted to change to a trade
where he would have to travel far from
home,
his wife could have legally
prevented him from changing jobs!
The primary purpose of sex
• is to reinforce the loving marital bond
between husband and wife.
• The first and foremost purpose of marriage
is companionship,
• and sexual relations play an important role.
Procreation is also a reason for sex
• but it is not the only reason.
• Sex between husband and wife is permitted
(even recommended) at times when
conception is impossible,
• such as when the woman is pregnant,
• after menopause,
• or when the woman is using a permissible
form of contraception.
Those who are
• Sterile
• beyond childbearing
age, or
• pregnant
• are all still obligated by
Jewish law to engage in
sexual relations.
In the Torah,
• the word used for sex between husband and
wife comes from the root word meaning "to
know,"
• which vividly illustrates that proper Jewish
sexuality involves both the heart and mind,
not merely the body.
Nevertheless,
• Judaism does not ignore the physical
component of sexuality.
• The need for physical compatibility
between husband and wife is recognized in
Jewish law.
A Jewish couple
• must meet at least once before the marriage,
• and if either prospective spouse finds the
other physically repulsive,
• the marriage is forbidden.
Sex should only be experienced
• Sex should only be experienced in a time of
joy.
• Sex for selfish personal satisfaction, without
regard for the partner's pleasure, is wrong
and evil.
• A man may never force
his wife to have sex.
A couple may not
• have sexual relations while drunk or quarreling.
• Sex may never be used as a weapon against a
spouse, either by depriving the spouse of sex or
by compelling it.
• It is a serious offense to use sex (or lack thereof)
to punish or manipulate a spouse.
Judaism believes that marriage
• is an honoured, essential part of Jewish life.
• At the same time, it recognizes that some
marriages break down irreparably and it
accepts divorce.
A document of divorce
• known as a ‘get’ and the method of issuing
this bill of divorce is described in
Deuteronomy 24:1.
• Orthodox Jews may still seek a get from a
rabbinical court (Beit Din) where as
progressive Jews usually rely on a civil
court.