Download Appositive

The Five Basic
Brush Strokes
.Absolute
.Appositive
.Participle
.Adjectives
Action Verb
Core sentence:
The car went into the parking lot.
Adding an Absolute Brush Stroke
Engine smoking, gears
grinding, the car went into
the parking lot.
An absolute consists of a noun and
an – ing word. You can add one or
two absolutes to the beginning or
end of the sentence.
• Engine smoking, gears grinding, the
car went into the parking lot.
• The car went into the parking lot,
wheels squeaking, bumper dragging.
• If you add three, or if you
drop these absolutes into the
middle of a sentence, they
lose some of their power to
be effective.
Absolutes from Jack
London
• Hair styling
mouth foaming
• Lips writhing and snarling
Ears
Jaws clipping together
laid
chest panting futilely
back
body flashing
forward
Muscles writhing and knotting like live
things under his silky fur
The mountain climber edged
along the cliff.
• Hands shaking, feet trembling, the
mountain climber edged along the
cliff.
• The mountain climber edged along
the cliff, hands shaking, feet
trembling.
• Now it is your turn. Take the following
sentences and add absolute phrases
either at the beginning or at the end of
the sentence.
• The mummy was moving.
• The diver peered once more at the
specimen.
• I glanced at the clock.
• The kitten yawned tiredly.
• The quarterback threw the pass.
• The cowboy spurred his horse.
Appositives
• Appositives are defined as a noun
that adds a second image to a
preceding noun.
• Like the absolute, the appositive
expands details in the reader’s
imagination.
Core Sentence
for Appositive Example
• The raccoon enjoys eating turtle
eggs.
Adding the Appositive
• Enhance the first image of the raccoon by
introducing a new perspective.
• Add a second image to the noun raccoon in
the sentence• The raccoon, a scavenger, enjoys eating
turtle eggs.
Appositive Construction
• Scavenger follows the noun raccoon
in the core sentence.
• The appositive is set off with
commas and enriches the image.
Appositive Phrases
• To add more vivid details, writers
often expand the appositive to
appositive phrases.
• The appositive phrases add more
details to enhance the visual image.
Appositive Phrases
• Core sentence - The raccoon enjoys
eating turtle eggs.
• Core sentence + appositive phrase:
The raccoon, a midnight scavenger
who roams lake shorelines in search
of food, enjoys eating turtle eggs.
Student Examples
• The volcano, a ravenous God of fire,
spewed forth lava and ash across the
mountain.
• The old Navajo woman, a weak and
withered lady, stared blankly.
• The fish, a slimy mass of flesh, felt the
alligator’s giant teeth sink into his scales
as he struggled to get away.
Participle
• A participle brush stroke is similar to
the absolute, but without the noun.
It can be defined as –ing word or
phrase tagged onto the beginning or
end of a sentence.
• Sliding on the loose gravel, the car
went into the parking lot.
The diamond-scaled snakes
attacked their prey.
• Hissing, slithering, and coiling, the
diamond-scaled snakes attacked their
prey.
• The participles evoke action. Now, we can
see the snakes coiling and slithering and
the hissing sound make us feel we are part
of the experience.
You can add participial phrases, a participle
along with any modifiers that complete the
image.
• Hissing their forked red tongues and
coiling their cold bodies, the
diamond-scaled snakes attacked
their prey.
Your Turn – Add participles or participial
phrases to the following sentences.
• The Olympic long jumper thrust the
weight of his whole body forward.
• Melody froze.
• The clown smiled and did his juggling
act.
• The rhino looked for freedom.
Jack London’s Participles
Shivering
Yelping
Snarling and growling
–
–
–
–
sinking his
Pulling
teeth into it
Till his surging and wrestling with it
Tendons
bristling
Cracked
snapping like a demon
Participles can end in –ed
as well
• Rugged and scarred, his hands were
franticly digging for the treasure.
• Hanging upside down above the
parking lot, suspended from a crane,
Gessi the Great twisted and twirled
in the wind.
The horse ran across the
field.
• Add more description:
• The large, white, muscular horse ran
across the field.
• Ok, what is the effect?
Let’s enhance the image
• The large horse, white and muscular,
ran across the field.
• This sentence spotlights two of the
adjectives giving them more power
and sophisticated feel.
This technique is called
adjectives out-of-order.
• Adjectives out of order amplify the
details of an image.
• Professional writers avoid a three in
a row string of adjectives by leaving
one adjective in its original place and
shifts the other two after the noun.
The large, red-eyed, angry bull moose
charged the intruder.
• The large bull moose, red-eyed and
angry, charged the intruder.
• The Pavilion was a simple city, long
and rectangular.
• I could smell Mama, crisp and
starched, plumping my pillow.
Jack London’s Adjectives
Out-of-Order
• Ruthless
swarthy
» Sour and introspective
» Mushy
» Limp and draggled
» Calm and impartial
bloody
parched and swollen
ragged and unkempt
Now it is your turn. Add adjectives outof-order to the following sentences.
• His soiled, wrinkled, calloused hands
portrayed a life of hard labor.
• The woman smiled upon her grandson with
pride.
• The boxer felt no compassion for his
contender.
• The cheetah stared at the gazelle, which
would soon become his dinner.
Action Verbs
• Writers can energize images with
action verbs.
• Verbs of passive voice communicate
no action.
The image is like a still photograph with
the subject of the action frozen with
the prepositions by or with.
• The runaway horse was ridden into
town by an old, white-whiskered
rancher.
• The grocery store was robbed by
two armed men.
Change the passive verb phrase with an
action verb.
• The old, white-whiskered rancher
rode the runaway horse into town.
• Two armed men robbed the grocery
store.
Being verbs slow the
action as well.
• Being verb: The gravel road was on
the left side of the barn.
• Action verb: The gravel road curled
around the left side of the barn.
Action verbs replace still photos with motion
pictures. Read the following two paragraphs.
• Rockwell was a beautiful lake. Canada
geese could be heard across the water
bugling like tuneless trumpets. Near the
shore, two children were hidden behind a
massive maple tree. Watching quietly, they
hoped to see the first gosling begin to
hatch. Tiny giggles escaped their whispers
of excitement.
Final Draft
• Rockwell Lake echoed with the sounds of
Canada geese. Their honking bugled across
the water like tuneless trumpets. Two
children hid behind a massive maple tree.
They silently watched, hoping to see the
first gosling hatch. Tiny giggles escaped
their whispers of excitement.
How important is the use
of action verbs?
• Jon Franklin, two-time Pulitzer Prize
winner, says:
• “Nothing is as critical as the use of
action verbs. This is absolutelyutterly, completely, with shrieking
boldface and CAPITAL LETTERScentral to good writing.”
Jack London’s Action
Verbs
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Sprang for his throat
sniffed
Wagged his tail
taunted him
Bristled his neck-hair and snarled
Whirled over
shrieked
Choked him
flung
throbbed
Crawled to his feet growled
Now it is your turn. Change the passive
verb or being verb to action.
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•
•
The meal was wonderful.
The little girl is sad.
The game was won by a long shot.
The new car was bought by my
father.
• The tree is tall.
The Five Basic Brush Strokes
Core Sentence: The car went into the parking
lot.
• 1. Absolute: Engine smoking, gears grinding, the
car went into the parking lot.
• 2. Appositive: The car, a 1936 Ford, went into the
parking lot.
• 3. Participle: Sliding on the loose gravel, the car
went into the parking lot.
• 4. Adjectives Out-of-order: The car, dented and
rusty, went into the parking lot.
• 5. Action verb: The car chugged into the parking
lot.
Brush strokes are colorcoded to match the palette.
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PARTICIPLE
ABSOLUTE
ACTION VERB
ADJECTIVES OUT-OF-ORDER
APPOSITIVE
Engine smoking, gears grinding, the car, a
1936 Ford, dented and rusty, chugged into
the parking lot sliding on the loose gravel.
Combining brushstrokes
• Then it crawled in. A spider, a repulsive,
hairy creature, no bigger than a tarantula,
crawled into the room. It crawled across
the floor up onto his nightstand and
stopped, as if it were staring at him. He
reached for a nearby copy of Sports
Illustrated, rolled it up, and swatted the
spider with all his might.
• He looked over only to see a hideous mass
of eyes and legs. He had killed it. Just
then, another one crawled in, following the
same path as the first. He killed that one
too. Then another one came, and another
and another. There were hundreds of
them! Hands trembling, sweat dripping
from his face, he flung the magazine left
and right, trying to kill the spiders, but
there were too many. He dropped the
magazine.
Helpless now, his eyes darted around
the room. He could no longer see the
individual spiders. He could just see a
thick, black blanket of movement. He
started squirming as he felt their
fang-like teeth sink into his pale
flesh like millions of tiny needles
piercing his body.
Now it is your turn! Write a paragraph using
the brushstrokes. Following are sample artist’s
image palette
• Movement: scudded frantically
Feet padding softly as a kitten
Fluttered up from her chair
Sitting like statues
Gushed from her eyes
Rhythmic and flowing as a dance
Character description
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Strong, gentle fingers
Glasses perched on his nose
Gleam of avid curiosity
Eyelids sagged
Hair stringing about her face
Nose a round soft bob
moods
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Prickles of apprehension
Flushed with rage
Sullen fury
Merry fire
Savagely
perturbed
Parts of speech
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Puny little brains
Delighted smile
Sweet autumnal smell
Tingling faintly
Jangling
grimly
• The teacher felt prickles of apprehension
as she awaited the start of another yearlong adventure. A heavy, sweet, autumnal
smell floated through the opened window
as on final survey of the room revealed a
state of readiness. The polished luster of
heavily waxed floor braced itself for the
onslaught of the stampeding throngs of
eager students. Reverberating through the
halls, the jangling bell jolted the teacher
from her moment of meditation.