Download Roots and Wings

ROOTS AND WINGS
FOURTH GRADE
LESSON THREE
Rev 7-04
I.
Review
A. Ask students to take out their R&W folders and put on their nametags.
B. Remind students that last time you were together, they:
 Reviewed the 3 types of communicators.
 Defined assertiveness and talked about Martin Luther King Jr. as
a person who was assertive.
II.
Overview
A. Tell students that today’s lesson will be focused on learning various ways
in which we communicate and practicing a useful tool for communication.
B. Tell students that by the end of the lesson, you plan for everyone to know
the ways in which we communicate and how to make an “I” statement.
III.
Program
A. Hand out verbal/non-verbal communication sheet and discuss.
B. Hand out verbal and non-verbal cue cards. Make sure the student
understands what they are to do.
 Have the student read the card using the body language
description on the card.
 Have the class give their impressions of what the person might
mean.
 Explain that ultimately, you need to be sure you understand what
someone wants and that if the verbal and non-verbal cues are not
compatible, that it is usually best to go with what the person is
saying verbally.
 Some people are not good at expressing emotions that fit what
they are saying. Always clarify with the person.
Examples from cards:
Angie says, “I love your new dress, Tina!”
While she says this, she has an expression of disgust on her face.
Joe says, “Shut up!!” He smiles and gently nudges the person.
What does he mean?
You might say, “I’m not afraid of horses” while you back away from one that is near you.
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What are some other ways that we communicate using our
bodies? Have kids give their ideas. (Facial expressions,
hand gestures, moving closer or further away, tilting the
head, eye contact…)
Sarcasm is often saying one thing and meaning the exact
opposite. What are some examples of sarcasm that you can
think of? Have kids who raise their hands come up to the
front and show examples. Remind them to use both words
and body language.
C. Tell students that assertive communicators use “I” statements to tell how
they feel and what they want. Hand out “I” Statements worksheet and go
over (students should be familiar with “I” statements from 3rd grade
R&Ws).
D. Give the students example situations and ask them to use an “I” statement
to express their feelings. Remind them that even though they may feel
angry, that anger is a secondary emotion (they learned this in third grade
R&W). Discuss the feelings that usually arise before the anger (on the
worksheet). Have students add any additional feelings that they may come
up with.
Examples:
 Your brother trips you after you accidentally trip over his foot.
 Your best friend tells someone a secret that you asked him or her
not to share.
 A classmate begs you to give him the answers to a homework
assignment that he did not finish.
 A classmate loudly points out that your pants are not zipped
while standing in line.
IV.
Evaluation
A. Ask students what the two ways we communicate are. (Verbal & nonverbal).
B. Ask students what tool does an assertive communicator use to say what
they feel and what they want. (“I” statements).
C. Ask for an example of an “I” statement.
V.
Summary
Thank the students for listening and participating.
Lesson Purpose
To learn various ways in which we communicate and to practice “I”
statements to assertively communicate what you feel and what you want.
Objectives:
1. The students will be able to describe verbal and non-verbal
communication.
2. The students will be able to use an “I” statement to express their feelings
in an assertive way.
PF Lesson Prep
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Make copies of the Verbal/Non-verbal communication handout.
Make copies of the “I” statement form.
Lesson Material Required
1. Verbal and non-verbal cards and handout.
2. “I” statement form
Assertive Communication
“I” Statements
“I feel_____________when you__________________________________
(Feeling word)
(Behavior that preceded your feeling)
and I would like it if you would__________________________________.”
(How you would like the person to treat you)
List of feeling words*:
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Sad
Embarrassed
Hurt
Confused
Unhappy
Disrespected
Upset
___________
___________
___________
*Remember, anger is a secondary emotion. We usually feel some other feeling first that
triggers the anger.
Instructions: Cut each of these situations and paste onto an index card.
You are Angie:
Angie says, “I love your new dress, Tina!”
While Angie says this, she has an
expression of disgust on her face.
.
You are Joe:
Joe says, “Shut up!!” He smiles and
gently shoves the person.
What does he mean?
You say:
“I’m not afraid of horses!” while
you back away from one that is nearby.
(Pretend)
Verbal and Non-verbal
Communication
Verbal communication means the things that we say.
Verbal communication may not even be words, but sounds
(a scream, chuckle, click of the tongue, etc.).
Non-verbal communication means the things that we do
not say with our mouths, but that we communicate with our
bodies.
 It is important to look at what people are saying and how
they are saying it.
 When you are communicating, it is important to send a clear
message with both your words and your body language.
 Assertive communication means stating your feelings and
backing it up with your non-verbal communication as well.
For example, if you do not want to do something dangerous
and you say, “No, I don’t want to do that,” but you smile
shyly while you say this, you are sending a mixed message
and you may not be taken seriously. The person listening to
you might think that you are saying no, but that you really
want them to talk you into it. To avoid further persuading on
their part, you need to send the message that you mean “no.”