Download L6 Non Verbal Communication Notes

L6 Non Verbal Communication
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What is Non Verbal communication?
The Importance of Non Verbal communication
The Components of Non Verbal communication
Evaluate your Non Verbal communication skills
Improve Non Verbal communication skills
INTRODUCTION:
This lecture covers the intriguing subject of body language. It explores what it means, how it
presents, how it is used both in a positive and negative sense, how to read it, perceive it, interpret it,
how to control your own and how to react to it. It also covers many other signals that we just take
for granted eg road signs, building signs, directory boards, exit signs and every other type of sign you
can think of.
1. What is Non Verbal Communication
It is expressing with modes of communication that are not verbal or written.
The modes could be in the form of gestures, body language, eye contact, voice tones, even signs eg
roadside.
WHAT’S BODY LANGUAGE?
Body Language is non-verbal communication. It is the subconscious way we move our bodies,
especially eyes, mouth and hands, when we are addressing and communicating with other people.
Body Language is therefore very relevant to management and leadership, and to all aspects of work
and business where communications can be seen and physically observed among people. [Of course
body language is also important in personal relationships as well!]
It is possible to learn as much from a person due to the way they position themselves, the gestures
they make, their facial expressions, the tone of their voice as you can from the words they speak.
However, this takes time and skill to learn and it is different in each culture. These actions don’t just
tell you about what the speaker is saying but also how that person is feeling. It is not unusual or
uncommon for kinemics (body language) [or kinesics (pronounced 'kineesicks') which is the study of
body language and communication] to contradict a person’s words. For example, someone who says
“I love your biscuits” while at the same time rolling their eyes and shaking their head in a negative
way is lying as the convergence does not relate. In other words the actions really mean the opposite
to what is being said.
Also body language works both ways:
Your own body language reveals your feelings and meanings to others.
Other people's body language reveals their feelings and meanings to you.
The sending and receiving of body language signals happens on conscious and unconscious levels
and plays a huge part in our overall understanding of what is being communicated in a face to face
encounter.
It is safe to say that today, body language represents a very significant proportion of the meaning
that is conveyed and interpreted between people. Many body language experts and sources seem to
agree that between 50-80% of all human communication is non-verbal. [This figure has been
extrapolated by Chele from a number of studies undertaken in the USA, some of which have been
disputed so I have adjusted it accordingly to give an indication only.] So while body language
statistics vary according to the situation, it is generally accepted that non-verbal communications are
very important in how we understand each other (or fail to), especially in face-to-face and one-toone communications, and most definitely when the communication involves an emotional or
attitudinal element.
We form our opinions of someone we meet for the first time in just a few seconds. This initial
instinctual assessment is based far more on what we see and feel about the other person than on
the words they speak. On many occasions we form a strong view about a new person before they
speak a single word. Consequently, body language is very influential in forming impressions on first
meetings.
The effect happens both ways - to and from:
When we meet someone for the first time, their body language, on conscious and unconscious
levels, largely determines our initial impression of them.
In turn, when someone meets us for the first time, they form their initial impression of us largely
from our body language and non-verbal signals.
And this two-way effect of body language continues throughout communications and relationships
between people every time we meet someone for the first time, throughout our lives. Body
language is constantly being exchanged and interpreted between people, even though much of the
time this is happening on an unconscious level. Remember - while you are interpreting (consciously
or unconsciously) the body language of other people, so other people are constantly interpreting
yours.
For example, our reactions to other people's eyes - movement, focus, expression, etc - and their
reactions to our eyes - contribute greatly to mutual assessment and understanding, consciously and
unconsciously.
With no words at all, massive feelings can be conveyed in a single glance. The metaphor which
describes the eyes of two lovers meeting across a crowded room is not only found in old romantic
movies. It's based on scientific fact regarding the strong powers of non-verbal communications and
people often relate to love at first glance!
These effects - and similar powerful examples - have existed in real human experience and
behaviour for thousands of years. The human body and our instinctive reactions have evolved to an
amazingly clever degree, which many of us are unaware of, ignore or take for granted. However, we
should all learn how to recognize these signs more clearly as it would certainly reduce the number of
misunderstandings and misguided decisions and actions that can, and often do occur.
The people with the most conscious awareness of, and capabilities to read, body language tend to
have an advantage over those whose appreciation is limited largely to the unconscious.
2. The Importance of Non Verbal communication
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What we say is as important as how we say it
Spoken Words are only 7% of our communication
First impressions through non verbal modes
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Globalisation highlights cultural diversity
Emotions are expressed best through non verbal modes
If used ineffectively or unknowingly, non verbal cues may lead to a disastrous:
 interview
 meeting
 conversation
 business deal
As a professional accountant you will be expected to perform in an appropriate manner.
Understanding Non Verbal communication will help you in your daily role as you interact
with colleagues and clients.
3. Components of Non Verbal Communication
Non-verbal communication includes:
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Pitch
Tone
Volume
Touch
Gestures
Facial expressions
Body posture
Proximity
Eye contact
Dress and appearance
Paralanguage
Haptics
Kinesics
Proxemics
Oculesics
3.1 Paralanguage
What does your voice say about you?
Pitch
High pitch voices are associated with anger, nervousness, and helplessness, while
lack of self confidence and depression is often expressed through a lower pitch.
Tone
When said in a strong tone of voice, words might be interpreted as enthusiastic /
over powering. The same words if said in a hesitant tone might suggest lack of
interest.
Volume
People who speak very loudly are often perceived by others as aggressive and
overbearing. Soft spoken people could be perceived as timid, polite or even
disinterested.
3.2 Haptics
Touch can be used to communicate affection, familiarity, sympathy and other
emotions. Examples:
Holding hands; Kissing; Hugging; Tickling and Shaking hands
3.3 Kinesics
is the study of “Body Language”
o Facial Expressions
Universally recognized emotions shown through facial expressions. Including:
ease, fear, anger, surprise, hate, contempt, disgust, happiness, and sadness
o Gestures
Gestures include movement of the hands, face, or other parts of the body.
o Posture
The common messages body posture conveys:
Crossed arms = defensive
Slumped posture = low spirits
Lean forward = open & interested
Lean away = defensive or disinterested
Uncrossed arms = willingness to listen
Erect posture = high spirits, energy and confidence
3.4 Proxemics
The concept goes something like this: The more comfortable we are with people
means that we are OK with them getting up close to us. The less comfortable
means we try to stay clear of them!
It is the study of how people use physical space in interpersonal interaction
3.5 Oculesics
It is the study of eye contact during any interaction
Tips for maintaining a good eye contact:
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Don’t just stare off into space
Your gaze at one individual [while conversing in a group] should not be more
than 5 seconds. Look at everyone.
Look at reactive listeners to assess their reaction
3.6 Appearance
It communicates how we feel and how we want to be perceived by others.
Initial Impression is based on appearance • Grooming and hygiene• Posture• Facial
expressions• Handshake• Verbal greetings• Personal adornments• Clothing
To present a professional appearance and inspire confidence: – Clothing should fit
properly – Be in good repair (free from tears, missing buttons, broken zippers,
uneven hemlines) – Shoes should be neat, clean, and comfortable.
4. Evaluating Your Non Verbal Communication Skills
4.1 Eye Contact
Is this source of connection missing, too intense, or just right in yourself or in the
person you are looking at?
4.2 Facial Expression
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What is your face showing?
Is it masklike and inexpressive, or emotionally present and filled with
interest?
What do you see as you look into the faces of others?
4.3 Tone of Voice
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Does your voice project warmth, confidence, and delight, or is it strained and
blocked?
What do you hear as you listen to other people?
4.4 Posture and Gesture
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Does your body look still and immobile, or relaxed?
Sensing the degree of tension in your shoulders and jaw answers this
question.
What do you observe about the degree of tension or relaxation in the
body of the person you are speaking to?
4.5 Touch
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Remember, what feels good is relative. How do you like to be touched?
Who do you like to have touching you?
Is the difference between what you like and what the other person likes
obvious to you?
5. How to improve Non verbal communication skills?
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Observe closely for tell tale signs
Speak at an appropriate pace – neither too fast nor too slow
Maintain the right kind of eye contact
Dress tidily – appearance matters!
Your body talks – watch it!
Watch out for negative signs / gestures like slouching, staring, etc.
Acknowledge what others are saying either by a nod or by small sounds
like umm, oh, etc.
Avoid excessive movement of hands during presentations / meetings.
It could create distraction.