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Co-Actualization: A New Construct in Understanding WellFunctioning Relationships Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) 374–398 © The Author(s) 2010 Reprints and permission: http://www. sagepub.com/journalsPermissions.nav DOI: 10.1177/0022167809348017 http://jhp.sagepub.com Renate Motschnig-Pitrik1 and Godfrey Barrett-Lennard2 Abstract The person-centered approach, positive psychology, and also neuroscience contribute evidence of a tendency toward actualization inherent in living organisms. In this article, the authors build on the observation that actualization in humans tends particularly to be promoted by being in wellfunctioning relationships with others. Each such fruitful relationship has a selfdeveloping quality as well as being enhancing to the relationship partners.The resulting process is referred to as co-actualization. The postulated tendency toward engagement in that process is called the co-actualizing tendency. The article characterizes co-actualization especially from a relationally oriented person-centered perspective on psychology, education, systems thinking, psychotherapy, conceptual modeling, and neuroscience.The authors cite evidence from various sources, identify questions for further research, include phenomenological considerations, and discuss potentials of the coactualizing process in close and larger scale relationships. Keywords actualizing tendency, formative tendency, co-actualization, interpersonal relationship, well-functioning relationships, person-centered approach, neuroscience, conceptual modeling 1 University of Vienna,Vienna, Austria Murdoch University, Perth, Western Australia, Australia 2 Corresponding Author: Renate Motschnig-Pitrik, University of Vienna, Rathausstrasse 19/9, 1010 V ienna, Austria Email: [email protected] Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 375 Introduction In developing the construct of co-actualization, we begin with prior paths of thought, particularly including concepts developed in the person-centered approach of Carl Rogers (1959, 1961) and more recently evolved with an equal focus on relationship (see Barrett-Lennard, 2005, 2007a, 2007b, 2009). Rogers (1959) discriminated an “inherent tendency of the organism to develop all its capacities in ways which serve to maintain or enhance the organism” (p. 196). This actualizing tendency was viewed as accounting for individual self-preservation and (especially) developmental growth. In his most relevant contribution, Maslow (1970) viewed self-actualization (he did not speak of a general actualizing tendency) as the pinnacle expression of growth motivation in humans. In the hierarchy of needs he posited, belongingness and love fall only in the midrange. When these and other maintenance needs are met, persons are “freed . . . for the fulfillment and actualization of their highest individual and species nature” (p. 198). For both Rogers (1959) and Maslow (1970) it was persons or organisms that could manifest an actualizing process; the same principle was not extended to relationships. We see that humans are inherently social beings who live in a world of connection and relationships and develop their distinctive identity mainly through experiences in relation. In this respect, Buber (1970) wrote in similar vein, arguing that relation precedes separation, as in the mother–infant relation, and that personhood develops from relation. More specifically, such relation entails confirmation of the other through a dialogical I–thou engagement process that brings forth the other’s present and becoming being (see also Friedman, 2002). Also in related thought, but writing from a contemporary analytic and attachment perspective, Mitchell (2000, p. xi) speaks of the “basic interpenetrability of minds that makes individual mindedness possible in the first place.” These and the more classical views by Bowlby (1980), Sullivan (1953), and others have broad resonance with our perspective, though we are more directly concerned (leading on to our main focus) with the basic nature of the phenomenon of human relationship itself. In a word, we see the forming of relationship as an emergent process in which a new entity is born, one that is distinct in kind from an individual personality and [that] also has life and influence. Its life is intricately intertwined with those of participant members but is of another order. (BarrettLennard, 2009, p. 82) But, how does this emergent process work? Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 376 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) A principal way that relationships begin is by two (or more) people coming into each other’s experienced presence. As and when this recurs the relationship develops. This can evolve with communication at a distance as well as face-to-face. Because mutual experience of the presence of the other is not all-or-nothing but occurs with varying degree or depth, the emergent relationships differ in strength and salience. Although most personal relationships have a developmental and/or self-generating potential, not all of them flower into a co-actualizing process. This is understandable in that relationship development—like actualization—tends not to be a smooth and linear process but one with peaks and valleys and sometimes plateaus of repetition or sameness. Not all relationships survive this evolutionary, selective process. The ingredient origins of those that do evolve include predominantly congruent, regardful, empathic attunement of participants to each other that “fertilize” and help to grow the relationship and are in turn supported by it. A co-actualizing process has a self-perpetuating quality that both draws from and fosters the actualizing processes in each person. It also tends to attract and provide resources that engage others. Among varied examples, consider a well-functioning relationship between parent-partners and its influence on their children or a set of constructive relationships among a group of colleagues or friends and the attraction of that ambience to others who may join them. A more prominent near example is the relationship between Carl Rogers and Rollo May, as revealed, for instance, in their authentic and yet highly regardful dialogical interactions (see Kirschenbaum & Henderson, 1989; Rogers, 1982). More formally, co-actualization develops from the interdependent actualization processes of the persons in relation and is reflected in the dynamic forming process of their relationship. A relationship has its own inner possibilities and order and a self-organizing quality (Kriz, 2006, 2007, 2008). All this leads us to further hypothesize a co-actualizing tendency as the relational counterpart to the actualizing tendency and the motivational source for co-actualizing processes. To explore co-actualization in several conceptual and process dimensions, we walk the path of person-relationship-centered thought that has led us to propose co-actualization as a useful construct. From there, we look for further evidence and backing in neuroscience, attending to the relational nature of consciousness and the mirror neuron mechanism that appears to support mutual understanding. Subsequently we use the visualization tools of conceptual modeling and associated structuring and explanatory resources, with a brief excursion into systems science. Then we turn to Rogers’s (1982) later thought and to a more detailed portrayal of our present understanding of Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 377 relationship and co-actualization—and to questions for further exploration. Finally, we will briefly address the impact that a searching understanding of relationship and co-actualization might have on personal mind-sets and relations within group cultures. However, before we proceed with this agenda, we want to acknowledge some of the personal experience (especially on Renate’s part) related to the phenomenon of co-actualization and the development of our ideas.1 We emphasize that the account that follows reflects a particular journey toward the thought we are unfolding here. Readers will have their distinctive personal-relational journeys that may nevertheless overlap sufficiently in underlying process for this brief story to be helpful in recognizing the conceptual destination we have come to. Experiential Background to the Idea of Co-Actualization Though the direction had been in Renate’s mind for some time, the “coactualization” sense started to become more distinctly conscious through her own firsthand experiences in relationships with, among others, her colleagues-friends at the Research Lab for Educational Technologies and special colleagues and friends from the person-centered community. In particular, mutual, empathically regardful listening evidently brought us (both the other person and myself) creative ideas and also could remove strain from navigating challenging situations. The honestly open, yet respectful, expression of feelings and meaning was experienced not only as personally freeing but as connecting us more meaningfully than before, such that we actively wanted to share meaning and insight. In other words, a shared bond having and generating strong and distinctly felt motivation had been created. However, the final crystallization and added clarity of the “co-actualization” idea and label happened for Renate through one relationship, different to the others in its subjectively perceived significance. To build this relationship— between the two authors—after meeting at a conference in 2003, we communicated in ways as diverse as mutually reading articles and books, e-mailing and, after 3 years, spending another conference period together sharing formal as well as personal concerns regarding experiences in relationship and our mutual interest in the person-centered approach. We later spent time, at the home base of one of us, in intensive and collaborative dialogue with each other and with Godfrey’s immediate colleagues and students. Godfrey’s—in Renate’s perception—rare quality of interpersonal presence and attentive, attuned listening, as well as his original idea of relationship as an emergent life entity with its own properties and influence (Barrett-Lennard, 2007a), helped Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 378 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) form the construct of co-actualization. Thus, this construct emerged from the direct experiencing of a fertile and energizing process that invited conceptual understanding. With our different experiences, styles, mother tongues, personal/family histories, and professional education and contexts, we did face some differences in the specific working out and expression of this conceptualization. From the whole sharing/interchange process and draftings we learned much and finally arrived at a version that we consider to be an advance on what either one of us alone could have contributed on our topic.2 Development of theory is a vital aim of this article. A good theory also has practical potentials, we believe in this case, of helping to focus possibilities and approaches to the enhancement of relationship life. The Person-Centered Approach and Neuroscience, With a Relationship Focus From the point of view of an individual organism, Rogers (1951) stated in Proposition IV of his originally formulated Theory of Personality and Behavior: “The organism has one basic tendency and striving—to actualize, maintain and expand the experiencing organism.” The actualizing tendency that he postulated was reflected in more specific attributes, including the following: • • • • • development towards the differentiation of organs and functions, expansion in terms of growth, expansion of effectiveness through the use of tools, expansion and enhancement through reproduction [and] development toward autonomy, and away from heteronomy, or control by external forces. (Rogers, 1959, p. 196) The last attribute does not accord with the viewpoint elaborated in this article and omits mention of any balancing developmental push toward belonging and combining with others—called homonomy (as distinct from autonomy) by Angyal (1941) and Tudor and Worrall (2006). Rogers’s (1959) view does imply that relationships can be of a kind that control or imprison the participants as opposed to relationships that allow participants to “be themselves” or actualize. Where the latter is true and the members do flower, it (in our terms) may lead into a co-actualizing process. In addition to the attributes distinguished above, we argue that the actualizing principle motivates exposure to and experience in relationship for the Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 379 self to form and develop. Hence, we propose to add a further attribute to Rogers’s list, namely, development toward forming constructive relationships. Rogers (1951) broadly acknowledges this direction in writing: “Finally, the self-actualization of the organism appears to be in the direction of socialization, broadly defined” (p. 488). From there it appears to be just a short step to the question: Is the growth of the relational self not naturally motivated by a tendency toward actualization in and of relationship or, in our terminology, a tendency toward co-actualization? For Rogers, the actualizing tendency focuses on the perspective of the organism itself. However, Proposition IX of his Theory of Personality and Behavior (1951) places the organism in his or her interaction with the environment and also implies a relational view of self-formation. Rogers (1951) writes the following: As a result of the interaction with the environment, and particularly as a result of evaluational interaction with others, the structure of self is formed—an organized, fluid, but consistent conceptual pattern of perceptions of characteristics and relationships of the “I” or the “me,” together with the values attached to these concepts. (p. 498) Given that the self is formed through interaction with the environment, in particular with others, we infer, with Schmid (2001) and others, that the self is relational in its formation and function. In other words, the self is symbolized through relationships that influence its forming configurations: relationships imbued with life and dynamically developing. For example, the close parent will have his or her “voice” in the self-structure of a child or the empathically understanding responses of a friend will gradually enable more self-empathy. Turning to a neuroscience perspective (see, e.g., Damasio, 2000; Motschnig-Pitrik & Lux, 2008; Motschnig-Pitrik & Nykl, 2003), the impact of our interaction with “objects”—subsuming any thinkable entity, but especially a person or a situation, external or internal in thought—can be appreciated from the very way consciousness flows and develops through interaction and engagement. Damasio (2000) is broadly concordant with propositions advanced here, by stating, The organism, as a unit, is mapped in the organism’s brain . . . [and an] object is also mapped within the brain, in the sensory and motor structures activated by the interaction of the organism with the object [. . .]. The sensorimotor maps pertaining to the object cause changes in the Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 380 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) maps pertaining to the organism. The changes [. . .] can be re-represented in yet other maps (second-order maps) which thus represent the relationship of object and organism. Because of the body-related nature of both organism maps and second order maps, the mental images that describe the relationship are feelings. (p. 169) In further broadly convergent thought, Damasio (2003) observes, in the context of biological life regulation, a natural life-supporting tendency in the sense of actualization: “[In biological terms] it is the aggregate of dispositions laid down in brain circuitry that, once engaged by internal or environmental conditions, seek both survival and well-being” (pp. 35-36). Later, Damasio acknowledges the social dimension. He writes, “It is reasonable to hypothesize that the tendency to seek social agreement has itself been incorporated in biological mandates, at least in part, due to the evolutionary success of populations whose brains expressed cooperative behaviours to a high degree” (p. 173). Further confirmation of our intrinsic need for relationship also can be found in Social Determination Theory. The authors of this theory (Deci & Ryan, 1991, 2000) propose (among other features) that one of the primary psychological needs essential for growth and well-being is relatedness, the urge to be in relationship with others, caring for others, and being cared for by others (cf. Tudor & Worrall, 2006). So far we have emphasized reciprocity and mutual influence in relationships. However, a relationship could still be considered as a bridge and passageway between separate individuals rather than as an emergent lifeimbued whole with its own dynamism and influence. Emphasizing the emergent whole perspective, one of the present authors wrote, Human selves are the founded echoes and consequences of relationship. It is not that the human organism is a passive receptacle but that it has active potential for self-formation that is nurtured and realized within and through relationship. Without relationship, an individual (if s/he were to survive) could scarcely know who they are as a person or learn how to know others. The becoming of persons, in this view, centres on inherent connective and relational processes in human living. Relationships have their own transpersonal properties as process entities imbued with life and influence. (Barrett-Lennard, 2007a, p. 190) Interestingly, mirror neurons, an anatomical mechanism found in the brains of higher creatures (Damasio, 2003), evidently support connective processes Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 381 between individuals (see also Iacoboni, 2008). The term mirror fits evidence that under certain conditions of immediate close contact the same neuronal activity pattern (Schulte-Rüther, Markowitsch, Fink, & Piefke, 2007) occurs in the same specific areas of a receiver’s brain as in the brain of a closely observed and felt other person whereas in other brain areas the activity patterns still differ. Mirror-like “mechanisms” in brain function can be conceived as helping to provide the conditions for co-actualization in so far as they allow one person to build aspects of the inner state of another person inside himself or herself, in a first person perspective. She or he is thus able to understand or know aspects of the other person’s inner world even prior to articulating these on an explicit level. Thus, mirror neurons can be viewed as physiologically supporting empathic understanding, that is, taking in and “knowing,” or resonating to vital features of the experience of the relationship partner. Moving now from this wider focus, we will briefly draw on a visual way of depicting constituent processes of co-actualization to provide a complementary way of throwing light on the structural features. A Graphical Conceptual Model of Key Features of Relationship and Co-actualization In conceptual modeling (Rumbaugh, Jacobson, & Booch, 1999), envisaging a simple connecting link between the entities is a potential starting point. However, to represent properties of relationships, we turn first to a more encompassing model that focuses on specific associative entities, such as “Partnership” in the example depicted in Figure 1. Looking at Figure 1, consider a partnership that exists between a Person A and a Person B modeled by an association entity, also referred to as a relator entity in the foundational ontology named UFO (Unified Foundational Ontology; Guizzardi, Wagner, Guarino, & van Sinderen, 2004). Some properties of the partnership entity are, for example, its duration or when it began, the quality of “we” perceived by the partners, their shared interest, the quality and style of their attachment, their investment in doing things together, the phenomenon and level of their mutual understanding, and the emergence and nature of their conflict and collaboration.3 The properties of each of the individual and partnership entities will be influenced by their larger context (not shown in Figure 1) and will also act in return to influence that context. Note that the model shown in Figure 1 is an abstract representation and there will be myriad properties that are not represented. Thus, it is necessarily incomplete and needs to be understood as a Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 382 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) influences start Partnership A~B shared interest in unfolding of ‘we’ quality Person A name interests significant events personality influences Person B is-partner-of name interests significant events personality Figure 1. Relationship modeled as an entity with emergent properties and with bidirectional relationships to the “person” entities coarse approximation designed to capture certain broad features of a subtle real-world phenomenon. To conceptualize aspects of co-actualization itself, Figure 2 shows an open system that encompasses three entities. Two of them denote the actualization processes in two persons who are reciprocally interconnected. “Forming Relationship” is an associative process entity denoting the unfolding relationship with its own emergent properties. This associative process, in turn, influences (and is influenced by) the participants’ actualization processes, as modeled by the “influences” links. The two block arrows on the top of Figure 2 informally denote the interaction of the open system (depicted as dashed rectangle) with its environment. A typical contextual process would be the dynamic social network surrounding the open, co-actualizing system. In terms of a systems perspective, actualization (e.g., Rogers’ concept) proceeds in dynamic relation to the process of co-actualization in a forming and ongoing relationship process. The construct of co-actualization is designed to make explicit: • The reciprocal influence between a forming relationship (A ~ B) and both (or all) actualizing relationship partners (A, B), that is, persons participating in the relationship. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 383 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard Environment co-actualization influences Actualization Person A Forming Relationship A~B reciprocates influences Actualization Person B Figure 2. Conceptual model of co-actualization as an open system including three bidirectionally linked processes: the actualization of each individual and of the forming relationship • The emergent relationship (A ~ B) itself in terms of its self-organizing, unfolding qualities. • The environment or surrounding system that (transitively) influences the open-relationship system and potentially is modulated by it. The dynamic, top-down, and bottom-up influence between the environment and the open-relationship system is depicted by the double-sided arrows in Figure 2. This double-sided flow is characteristic for open complex systems in general and social systems in particular. As already implied, the posited co-actualizing tendency is just that—a tendency, not an imperative. Co-actualization is a potential realized in some relationships4 and not in others. Thus, we view co-actualizing relationships as a particular (and vitally important) class. We also recognize that relationships do not flow evenly, so a co-actualizing quality might be reached but not evident all the time. When it is reached and evident then the partners value and feel enriched by their relationship. It is a live phenomenal reality in their minds and feeling, a “we” and “us” that they also experience as having strengths and resources that complement and extend their capacities one by one. Their relation enriches their sense of meaningful connection in Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 384 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) their world. If none of these characteristics apply then the relationship is not co-actualizing in our terms. Factors that work against this quality include conditions of worth in participants, social rivalry, competitive attitudes or need to dominate, devaluing in communication, external danger or deprivation, and, in general, a lack of time, trust, interest, engagement, congruence, unconditionality, regard, and empathic understanding. Further Steps in Anchoring and Refining Our Thought In his later writing, Rogers (1980) observed a tendency toward complexity and wholeness in the universe, a direction that complements the tendency toward deterioration reflected in the phenomenon of entropy. He stated, “There appears to be a formative tendency at work in the universe, which can be observed at any level” (p. 124). As examples of this formative tendency, consider the increasing complexity of organisms through evolution or the forming of order out of chaos, such as in the Bénard-instability where myriad molecules “cooperate” in forming a directional flow (Kriz, 1998). Expressed for our own species, in Rogers’s words (1980): It seems that the human organism has been moving toward the more complete development of awareness. It is at this level that new forms are invented, perhaps even new directions for the human species. It is here that the reciprocal relationship between cause and effect is most demonstrably evident. It is here that choices are made, spontaneous forms created. (p. 127) Given that new forms are invented as an effect of the motivational resources inherent in the formative tendency, this provides a further basis to focus on the ever present form of persons in relationship, such as partnerships, friendships, families, and communities. Based on the above, we see a tripartite system of actualizing directions in which the co-actualizing tendency is a crucial, yet interconnected, level between the actualizing tendency inherent in each organism and the formative tendency operational in the universe. Viewed in this perspective, the co-actualizing tendency represents the essential motivational and creatively forming aspect of human coexistence. The three tendencies can be characterized in comparative view by their level of expression and directions of focus. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 385 • Actualizing tendency (Rogers, 1951; 1959): level of expression: organism direction/focus: maintenance and enhancement of the person • Co-actualizing tendency level of expression: the relationship system itself (emergent from persons in relation) direction/focus: maintenance and enhancement of the relationship system as a continually unfolding process in interdependent relationship with its environment • Formative tendency (Cornelius-White, 2007b; Rogers, 1980): level of expression: the universe and interconnection of its components direction/focus: wholeness, greater complexity, greater interconnectedness Dynamic Systems We view human relationships as a distinctive expression of the more encompassing forming principle also observable in molecular movement, phylogenesis, evolution, and generally in dynamic systems (Kriz, 1998): They are distinctive in involving conscious formation. Our engagement with others is, to a significant degree, our mutual conscious choice. Typically, across cultures, we at least participate in the choice of our relationship partners and influence the quality and intensity of engagement in family, friendship and communal relationships (Barrett-Lennard, 2005). Also, relationship systems are already well represented in natural language, both by distinctive nouns (“family,” “team,” “group,” “community,” “state”) as well as verbal phrases such as “valuing” or “investing time in” the relationship. Interestingly, although the level of expression and the direction and focus of the three identified tendencies—actualizing, co-actualizing, and formative— differ, common characteristics exist at the more general system level (Kriz, 1998). Dynamic systems “actualize” inherent potentialities in a selforganized way. The respective processes also proceed in interaction or relationship with the environment of other people and circumstances. Actualization and the Person-Centered “Core Conditions” Research in the person-centered approach, lasting for more than half a century, has supported predictions that presume an inherent actualizing tendency, conceived as a generic source of motivation for change and of our inclination Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 386 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) toward making beneficial goal choices (Sheldon, Arndt, & Houser-Marji, 2003). The actualizing tendency can unfold itself best in a climate of congruence, positive and unconditional regard, and empathic understanding (Barrett-Lennard, 1998; Rogers, 1959, 1961). Where mutually supported, this climate is most conducive to fruition of personal and relationship being (Nykl, 2005). A climate of trust tends to pervade such relationships. The mutual enrichment produces still more motivation and flow-between in a warmth of engagement both at the individual level and in the relationship itself and is likely to be gainfully perceived by others. However, the resulting co-actualization, like actualization (Rogers, 1959), is not expected to be a smooth continuous process but, more typically, one with peaks of strong presence and valleys where it is not apparent. Thus, naturally, challenges need to be met regarding social environmental “nutrients” for the forming of such relationships (see Barrett-Lennard, 2005, e.g., chap. 5). Relationship Challenges Various kinds of challenge to relationships can flow in from the environment, such as family of origin pressures, stressful job conditions or loss of employment, loss of support systems through relocation, and social upheaval or natural disasters, to name a few. Resulting anxiety or other effects may work against the formation of co-actualizing relationships or, in some cases, undermine ones that exist. A human life entails a network of relationships, which effectively influence each other (Barrett-Lennard, 2005, 2007b). Confrontation and conflict occurring within a relationship is not always adverse in its effects and may even be developmental, depending on the broader bond and pattern of the relationship itself and/or the presence of other safe and facilitative relationships that work to support partners in turning a crisis into a growth opportunity. A co-actualizing relationship is a dynamic living open system that, by its nature, does not simply repeat itself on an even and steady course. It may on occasion be jolted aside from the pattern most familiar to participants but remains self-maintaining, vitally alive, and with a guidance system that both draws from the participants and has its own momentum. Supportive Human Capacities Given the great enrichment that can result from engaging in co-actualizing processes, what human capacities are supportive of such processes? We have mentioned our inference that the person-centered conditions are basic, especially in active mutual expression. Resourceful, open sharing and listening in Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 387 a truly complementary dialogue (Barrett-Lennard, 1998; Bohm, 2003; Ellinor & Gerard, 1998; Motschnig & Nykl, 2009) and keeping the relationship sufficiently open toward influences from the environment are supportive of the process and its continuation. In broader related thought, one of the authors has worked elsewhere to describe “well” relationships; ones that would (in our present terms) have a co-actualizing quality. These, he proposed, would be marked by a fluidity of communication, a freely varying intensity and vibrancy, energy in the engagement process, and a distinct sense of joint as well as individual identity reflected, for example, in an easy shifting of attention from self to other to We and also to Us engaged with others. In more conceptual terms, the relation is a living, open and adaptive system, “self-regulating and growthful in quality, aware of itself through the consciousness of participants, and in dynamic motion through its internal processes and external feedback” (Barrett-Lennard, 2007a, p. 192). A complementary characterization coming out of another context of research and thought can be found in Johnson and Johnson (1975/2006) regarding their social judgment theory: The process of acceptance is based on the individuals promoting mutual goal accomplishment as a result of their perceived positive interdependence. The promotive interaction tends to result in frequent, accurate, and open communication; accurate understanding of one another’s perspective; inducibility; differentiated, dynamic, and realistic views of one another; high self-esteem; success and productivity; and expectations for positive and productive future interaction. (p. 100) Such attitudes and capacities naturally can lead on to recognition of relationship as a core manifestation of human life, not merely an avenue through which to satisfy individual wants. The ability to experience relationship in this way is very much in keeping with placing high value on human association, as has been expressed, for example, by Hanley and Abell (2002) who move from Maslow’s more individualistic view to a truly interpersonal model of self-actualization. Still, further research is needed to provide encompassing responses to questions such as: What is the full range of circumstance for co-actualizing relationships to develop? How can they evolve or be facilitated in various Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 388 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) contexts and cultures? What tend to be obstacles and how they can be overcome? To throw more light on the nature and scope of such questions, the next subsection offers an intercultural view on the attachment aspect of relationship. It illustrates that the co-actualizing tendency needs to accommodate a dynamic variety of patterns of attachment. Co-Actualization, Attachment, and Culture Interestingly, although looking through the lens of one feature only, attachment theory (e.g., Bowlby, 1980) strongly supports the tendency toward forming relationships. Arguably, attachment bonds between humans are established in any known culture (Van Ijzendoorn & Sagi, 2002). In particular, in Western societies most infants are deemed securely attached (Van Ijzendoorn & Sagi, 2002), tending toward developing trusting, lasting relationships. However, this does not predict that any particular attachment pattern is universally normative. Evolution may not have equipped human beings with rigid behavioral strategies because these would have made it difficult for them to adapt to changing environments. In particular, if a cultural niche requires the suppression of negative emotions, arguably infants could develop an avoidant attachment pattern that is more adaptive in those circumstances but which may later adapt to changing circumstances. This implies that the manner and degree of unfolding of the co-actualizing tendency depends on the broader social environmental context. Even if the process we have described is at first inhibited by environmental influences, a relationship with co-actualizing features—one in which the reciprocal qualities described previously are experienced at least to some degree—might still develop. The journey by which this happened would of course be influenced by the culture. Research Evidence From Three Selected Fields In everyday life, several phenomena can be observed or (better) experienced that can host co-actualization processes. Among them consider, for example, close and confident friendships, well-functioning teams and partnerships, fruitful encounter and self-help groups, easy, trusting, and valued collegial relationships, learning and professional communities at their best, and, not least, well-functioning families and communities. Hence, the proposed construct can be viewed as a generic process concept that denotes a class of relationship systems distinguished by the co-actualizing quality. In the following we select three settings for which research evidence of broadly Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 389 relevant nature is both available and foreshadowed: client-centered therapy, the group process, and person-centered education. The extensive past research in client-centred therapy has been closely reviewed by one of the authors (Barrett-Lennard, 1998, Part 4) and includes features that helped to lay the foundation for the fresh ideas advanced in this article. Looking to new work with direct linkage, this author lately has observed that All such study would be informed by an understanding of the therapistclient relationship as something that goes beyond dialogue (of a special kind) to a process that has its own nature and individual dynamism emergent from the interplay of the participants. The resulting relationship depends utterly on both (or all) partners; at first, on how each plays on the other, the responses this brings forth and how these subtly interweave, unfold and flow in the becoming of their twosome, a twosome (in ‘individual’ therapy) distinctive in its directionality and potential. (Barrett-Lennard, 2009, p. 84) The dyad “needs in this view to be healthy and health-giving, and thus one that contributes to the quality of other relationships in the client’s life, both self-relations and outer relationships” (Barrett-Lennard, 2009, p. 84). The group process in well-functioning person-centered or similar encounter groups (Barrett-Lennard, 1975, 1998, 2003; Lago & McMillan, 1999; Natiello, 2001; Rogers, 1970) has a tendency to move through stages toward an atmosphere with increasing trust, constructive openness, mutual regard, and understanding. The majority of persons indicate that, as a result of their participation in groups, their interpersonal relationships with friends, colleagues, and family members tend to improve. As one particular example of a reaction from a participant in an international encounter group in Brno, Czech Republic (2007), we quote, Through your attentive listening to me and staying with me in my troubles I could clarify a lot in me. However, the most significant thing I take with me from this group—and something that will stay with me for a long, long time—is the way we listened to each other and behaved with respect to each other. This self-searching participant experienced relational qualities such as genuine interest in each other and mutually supportive interactions even more strongly than the aspect of individual gain. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 390 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) In the context of person-centered education, the personal relationship between the facilitator and the learner is viewed as the most pivotal factor in significant learning (Rogers, 1983). In fact, numerous studies provide evidence (Barrett-Lennard, 1998; Cornelius-White, 2007a; Cornelius-White, Hoey, Cornelius-White, Motschnig-Pitrik, & Figl, 2004; Motschnig-Pitrik, 2005; Motschnig-Pitrik & Mallich, 2004; Rogers, 1969) that a climate based on realness, respect, and deep understanding communicated by the facilitator and perceived by students allows for multilevel learning and development. For example, the majority of students who perceive this constructive climate in class report that it is easier for them to establish interpersonal relationships with other students (Motschnig-Pitrik & Figl, 2007), and they also tend to feel more respect, caring, trust, connectedness, and shared initiative and responsibility in the course-community. Interestingly, the majority of students also report improved interpersonal relationships outside the immediate context, such as in their family or the workplace (Motschnig-Pitrik, 2008). The changes are in the direction of establishing potential for the development of co-actualizing relationships. Having illustrated settings that invite or enhance potential for co-actualizing processes, we next consider some of the further implications of relationships that have this quality. On Further Characterizing Co-Actualization, Its Implications, and Adverse Conditions The Lifetime of Co-Actualizing Processes Emergent properties of a relationship result from the blend of qualities and patterns of interplay of the participants. The lifetime of a co-actualizing process may start as early as when a new relationship flows of its own momentum toward a mutual depth of sharing connection, and it may last through the overlapping lifetime of the participants or be cut off at an earlier stage. Generally, the life of a significant relationship tends to continue for longer than the period of active engagement—both within the consciousness of the original participants and as influences on other relationships (Barrett-Lennard, 2009). When a significant other lives on in a person’s inner life only, that relationship could not be co-actualizing, though a cherished memory of this quality may be present in the remaining person’s consciousness and be carried into other relationships. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 391 Alternatives in Approaching a Relationship In each new situation with another person or group there are implicit options as to the kind of relationship desired or possible. The participants might want to engage in a way that could, in effect, bring a co-actualizing quality about. As alternatives, they or one of them can “decide” between scarcely engaging at all or engaging in a direction that may preserve or enhance their own organism irrespective of the cost to a receptive other and thus also to the potential of their relationship. The latter direction is expected to occur with persons characterized by a dismissing attachment style who tend to derive their selfesteem from (among others) a sense of autonomy (Park, Crocker, & Mickelson, 2004). The “decision” on which level to actualize—organism or relationship system—we assume, will be best informed if based on a congruent, fluent inner state, aligning thought, feeling, and awareness of context in leading to action. We acknowledge that threats, competition leading to social rivalry (Schapiro, Schneider, Shore, Margison, & Udvari, 2009; Sullivan, 1953), feelings of helplessness or uselessness, and incongruence of any kind may interfere with a co-actualizing process and turn on defensive, hostile reactions. However, regardless of every person’s “capacity for evil behavior” (Rogers, 1982, in Kirschenbaum & Henderson, 1989, p. 254), an environment that includes distinctly co-actualizing relationships would, according to our construct and experience, strengthen or bring out a person’s—on some occasions concealed—tendency for co-actualizing associations. Extended Perspective At the outset, we need to acknowledge our inherent need to be in relationship as already implied by the actualizing tendency. As little as just being present for another person may be facilitative for his or her or our development. Perhaps the value of presence comes from its enabling function for any kind of contact, sharing, and consciousness-advance. Carried further, if we can form a relationship that is motivating for both or all of us, personal enhancement will happen naturally and is likely to spread as well as to “come back” through others. Thus, a co-actualization option may inspire a fresh, reciprocal, contextual, and, in any case, more encompassing view on the function of presence, genuineness, empathic understanding, openness to experience in relationship and organismic or holistic valuing. As a further implication, in a co-actualizing process there is always the possibility of attributing phenomena such as feelings, issues, and problems to the particular relationship or context rather than seeing them exclusively as a part or expression of one person-self. This may turn out to be both less Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 392 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) threatening and more free of distortion and actually provide more room for exploring and discovering the contribution of each person. Not to be misunderstood: We do not argue in favor of pushing away responsibility, we rather argue to keep feeling genuinely co-responsible within the frame of a relationship and its context. This is also expected to improve “team learning” and “systems thinking” as core disciplines of a “learning organization” (Senge, 2006) and as the basis of self-managed teams (Ryback, 1998). Conclusions and Questions for Further Research In this article, we have advanced consideration of co-actualization as an extension of the actualizing principle to the level of relationship systems, based on our person–relationship centered approach and continually evolving constellation of ideas. We see a natural tendency at work that is directed toward forming constructive relationships, given that the proper conditions exist or can be developed. Real-world phenomena such as personal friendships and well-functioning families, teams, or other close groups can be said in our terms to involve potentially co-actualizing relationships. This justifies the study of the properties of co-actualizing processes and their dynamics to find out under exactly what circumstances they come into being, maintain and enhance themselves, and what the reasons for disintegration are. Whereas in this article we have worked from a relationally oriented person-centered viewpoint, further work might well address the phenomenon from complementary orientations. The resulting knowledge could have far reaching interpersonal as well as political and strategic consequences. It might, for example, bring us closer to being able to influence relationship systems such as communities and organizations to move forward in terms of approaching psychologically “healthy” conditions for the accomplishment of common goals. It even has the potential to envision processes that can contribute to preventing wars on the one hand or enforced, dictated, and unsatisfactory integration policies on the other hand. In any case, when environmental forces are not overwhelming, we as humans appear to have alternatives: Our interactive behavior might be either reflective of the co-actualizing tendency or solely the expression of a tendency to maintain and enhance individual organisms. What can guide our choice between these paths? As beings equipped with consciousness we seem to face a decision. We propose that the answer lies in congruence and regardful, empathic attunement to the whole situation. It encompasses the active inclusion of the other(s) and the environment, expressed through interest in and sharing with them. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 Motschnig-Pitrik and Barrett-Lennard 393 Co-actualizing processes will also act back to influence self-being toward increased congruence between feeling, awareness, and expression and enhance recognition of its differentiated, flexibly organized relational subconfigurations or subselves. In such a fluent configuration, a relationship may extend to influence the whole self. One may perceive oneself as more and more connected to another and freely align some of one’s directions and meanings with the other as a joined “gestalt”. Yet, co-actualization applies to a relationship as a “forming species”, which develops its own life and influence whether or not this is fully in the consciousness of the participants. A strongly co-actualizing process may let each of us feel more capacity, perhaps even more responsibility. We may each feel more whole, energized, and alive, with a sense of diminished boundary between self and other. In contrast to a simple crossing of separate journeys, we would be aware that a larger confluent flow is involved. Summarizing, this article has offered perspectives on the tendency toward forming constructive relationships, particularly from a neo-person-centered standpoint considering fields such as psychology, education, systems thinking, psychotherapy, conceptual modeling, and neuroscience. This conceptual understanding could be a step toward further sensitizing ourselves to the huge impact relationships have at various levels, starting from intimate relationships with close partners and stretching to large-scale political and intercultural affairs. Rather than closing up the construct of co-actualization, this article aims to inspire research from a range of perspectives and encourage further thought and experience along the lines opened up by our initial forming of the new construct. Acknowledgements We thank the editor and the reviewer for their comments, both confirming and critical, on earlier versions of this article. Declaration of Conflicting Interests The authors declared no potential conflicts of interests with respect to the authorship and/or publication of this article. Funding The authors received no financial support for the research and/or authorship of this article. Notes 1. We are encouraged by Rogers’s (1961, p. 217) view that “the initial phase of science, probably its most important phase, [. . .] has been minimized and ignored.” As Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 394 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) he also put it, “Science exists only in people. Each scientific project has its creative inception, its process, its tentative conclusion in a person or persons” (p. 216). 2. As one example of our thought connection, the quotations from Godfrey’s writing were all initiated by Renate. As an impression on the amount of communication between us, let us share that there were 6 full rounds of manuscript exchanges before initial submission and 4 rounds before the submission of the revised version, with about 40 e-mails sent and the same number received. This may reflect that each of us really cared to express one’s thought and equally was eager to understand and construct meaning from what the other thought, in a reciprocal process. 3. Note that in conceptual models, traditionally, each property of an entity, such as a person’s name, is assigned one or more values (Rumbaugh et al., 1999). Typically, these values are assigned from an external frame of reference. In our application (psychosocial phenomena), however, it equally makes sense to assign values from an internal frame of reference, such as my current perception of the quality of our partnership. 4. More precisely, co-actualization has been specified for relationship systems. However, for brevity, we often use the imprecise term relationship. References Angyal, A. (1941). Foundations for a science of personality. New York: Commonwealth Fund. Barrett-Lennard, G. T. (1975). Process, effects and structure in intensive groups: A theoretical-descriptive analysis. In C. L. 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Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016 398 Journal of Humanistic Psychology 50(3) Bios Renate Motschnig is head of the Research Lab for Educational Technologies at the University of Vienna, Austria and held positions at the University of Technology, Vienna, the RWTH Aachen in Germany, the University of Toronto, Canada, and the Masaryk University in Brno, Czech Republic. Since her studies of computer science in the 80’s she participated in encounter groups and several events based on the Person-Centered Approach. She is deeply interested in the multiple ways in which understanding and whole-person learning happen and is determined to foster a style in higher education that is based on person-centered attitudes, our co-actualizing potential, and thoughtful support by web-based technology. She appreciates synergies between presence and distance, cognition and feeling/meaning, and a multitude of (scientific) disciplines and cultures. In “retirement’ Godfrey (Goff) Barrett-Lennard is Honorary Fellow in Psychology at Murdoch University in Western Australia, is actively connected with colleagues internationally and absorbed in further writing and research. At Murdoch he is informal mentor to the Godfrey Barrett-Lennard Counsellor Training Centre, and is honorary Doctor of the University. He studied with Carl Rogers, pioneered research on the therapist-client relationship with his Relationship Inventory, and graduated (PhD, 1959) from the University of Chicago. He is a Fellow of APA and its Australian counterpart. He taught in Eastern Australia and North America before finally settling again in Perth. His publication topics include self-process and psychotherapy, empathy and listening, group, family and community processes, and broader inquiry into human relations systems. Author of Carl Rogers’ Helping System: Journey and Substance (Sage, 1998), his later writing includes the works mentioned in this article. He sees his own growth as coming mainly through relationships. Downloaded from jhp.sagepub.com at PENNSYLVANIA STATE UNIV on March 6, 2016