Download Chapter 10 - Fort Bend ISD

Chapter 10 – Lesson 1
FOUNDATIONS OF HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Relationships: a bond or connection you have with
other people.
We as human beings (social creatures) have a need to
belong and be loved, feel safe, secure, valued and
recognized. These needs are met when we form
healthy relationships.
All relationships can have positive and negative
effects on your physical, mental/emotional, and
social health. Based on shared values, interests and
mutual respect. We’re drawn to those that encourage
and support us. In healthy relationships both people
benefit and feel comfortable.
Family relationships – parents, grandparents, etc.,
and last your entire life. Enhance all sides of your
health triangle:
 Physical health - parents or guardians provide
you with food,
clothing, and shelter.
 Social health – teach you the values that will
guide you throughout your life.
 Mental/emotional health – love, care and
encouragement.
Friendship: a significant relationship between two
people that is based on caring, trust and
consideration. You might share confidences, hobbies
and other friends. A friendship can positively
influence your self-concept and behavior and help
you resist negative influences.
Citizenship: the way you conduct yourself as a
member of the community. Members work together
to promote the safety and well-being of the entire
community.
o Volunteer at a hospital or work to provide food,
clothing and
shelter to the homeless.
o Obey laws and rules.
o Be friendly and helpful to neighbors.
o Contribute to efforts to improve your school and
community.
Role: a part you play in a relationship (sister,
brother, boyfriend, girlfriend, member of a team).
Roles can be both obvious and unclear making it hard
to know how to act sometimes.
The Three C’s of Healthy Relationships
1. Communication: your ways of sending and
receiving messages. Can be exchanged in
words, gestures, facial expressions & behaviors.
2. Cooperation: working together for the good of
all. Builds strong relationships.
3. Compromise: a problem-solving method that
involves each participant’s giving up something
to reach a solution that satisfies everyone. “Give
and take” strengthens relationships. Shows the
other person that you are willing to give up
something to reach a solution because you value
the relationship. It should be acceptable to all
concerned. Do not go against your values or
beliefs, so use your refusal skills stand your
ground.
Characteristics of Healthy Relationships
 Mutual Respect and Consideration – even when
you disagree. Be thoughtful about the rights and
feelings of others.
 Honesty – have the confidence to be open and
honest about their actions, thoughts and feelings.
Dishonesty can seriously weaken or even
destroy a relationship.
 Dependability – be trustworthy and reliable. Be
there for the other when needed.
 Commitment – work together and make
sacrifices that benefit everyone involved. They
are loyal and committed to the relationship.
Character: the way you think, feel and act – has
the greatest influence on your relationship with
others.
Demonstrating Character in Relationships - Figure
10.1, page 252
-2Ch 10 Lesson 2
Communication Styles:
 Passive- inability to express thoughts and
feelings. Do not stand up for self or defend their
thoughts and beliefs.
 Aggressive- often get their way through bullying
and intimidation. Do not consider rights or
thoughts of others. In disagreement, they attack
other person and ignore problem.
 Assertive- expresses thoughts and feelings
clearly and directly without hurting others.
Defend attitudes and beliefs while respecting
others. In disagreements, they attack problem,
not person. Uses effective speaking and
listening skills as well as appropriate body
language.
Speaking skills- Good communication skills
 Do not assume others can read your mind. You
are responsible for making your thoughts and
feelings known.
 Clearly say what you mean.
 Tone, pitch, and loudness of voice can have
affects.
Ex: kind words in sarcastic tone, say no
softly, etc..
 “I” Messages- statement saying how you
feel. Can communicate your feelings
positively without blame that cause people
to go defensive.
Listening skills- equally as important as speaking.
 Active listening- paying close attention to
what someone is saying, giving full
attention, not interrupting or making
judgments.
 Reflective listening- summarize or
rephrase
 Clarifying- asking questions to make
sure you understand.
 Encouraging- show that you’re
interested and that you understand.
 Empathizing- imagine how they feel
and then feel for the person as you
listen.
Nonverbal communication
 Body language- nonverbal communication
through gestures, facial expressions,
behaviors, and posture.
Communication Barriers
 Identity- teen searching for self.
 Unrealistic expectations
 Lack of trust
 Prejudice
 Gender stereotyping
Constructive Feedback
 Constructive criticism- non hostile
comments that point out problems and
encourage improvement. Intended to bring
about positive changes.
Acknowledgments and Compliments
 Expressing and receiving respect,
admiration, and appreciation with grace and
sincerity can help build healthy
relationships.
 Can take on many forms. Ex: telling parent
that the meal was good, telling friend that
she is a good artist, or congratulating the
volleyball team on making playoffs.
Lesson 3- Conflict
Conflict-Disagreement, Struggle, or a Fight
Causes of Conflict
Responding to Conflict Two choices- face the conflict, or ignore it.
 Negotiation- use of communication and
compromise to settle a disagreement.
 Make sure issue is important.
 Check the facts.
 Goal is to find a solution.
 Figure out what you’re going to say.
Conflict Resolution- process of solving a
disagreement is a manner that satisfies all.
Strategies
1. Take time to calm down and think over the
situation
2. When discussing the conflict, take turns
explaining each person’s side of the conflict
without interruption. Use “I” messages.
3. Ask for clarifications so that each person
understands the other’s position.
4. Brainstorm solutions.
5. Agree on a solution that benefits both sides.
6. Follow up to see whether the correct solution
was chosen and whether that solution worked for
each person.
Steps to take when negotiating Select time and place that’s appropriate
 Work together toward the solution
 Keep an open mind
 Be flexible
 Take responsibility for your role
 Give the person an “out”
Mediation- process in helping others resolve conflicts
peacefully.
 Confidentiality- keep details secret
 Set ground rules that you explain to both
sides.
 Mediator starts by asking each person to
describe the disagreement. Then summarizes
each side and asking for clarification, then
an agreement is worked out and both parties
must agree.