Download Lesson 2 – Studying Marriages and Families

Lesson 12 Communication
Robert Wonser
Effective Communication
The process of exchanging information
using verbal and non-verbal messages in a
way so that the intended message is
received
Productive communication enhances the
emotional closeness and strengthens the
relationship
Non-productive communication increases
the emotional distance
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Content and Process of
Communication
The content of the communication is what
the message is.
Expectations
Needs
Wants
The process is how it is conveyed
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Process
 Verbal
 words
 Nonverbal
 the way in which people communicate, intentionally or
unintentionally, without words
 facial expressions
 tone of voice
 non-verbal vocalizations
 gestures
 body position and movement
 touch
 gaze and eye contact
 personal space
 Actions
 Positive
 Negative
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Charles Darwin
Universal Emotions
Anger
Happiness
Surprise
Fear
Disgust
Sadness
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Encode
express or emit nonverbal behavior
Decode
interpret the meaning of the nonverbal
behavior of others
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Barriers to Communication
Physical and environmental
Situational
Cultural
Gender
Psychological
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To Improve Communication
Motivation and concern
Self-disclosure
Clarity
Listen/ask for and provide feedback
Avoid distractions
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BED
REST
AWAKE
TIRED
DREAM
AWAKE
NIGHT
EAT
COMFORT
SOUND
SLUMBER
SNORE
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Write down all the words you can
remember
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What does power mean to you?
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Power
ability to meet one’s needs
ability to influence a partner to get
what one wants
power differentials in intimate
relationships=problems
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Power
Everything, including relationships and
communication can be boiled down to
power.
principle of least interest simply states that
the partner who is least interested has the
most power.
Why might this be so?
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Who typically has the power?
those who have the least interest in the
relationship
those who gain the least from the
relationship
those who have invested the least
those who have the most resources
women with more education
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What theory could we use for studying the
distribution of power in a family?
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Arguments
 non-directional arguments,
because the underlying
issue is not being dealt
with in the argument itself
 Directional arguments have
a goal or a purpose and
usually approach the issue
that led to the argument in
the first place.
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Getting to the Core of the
Problem: The Roots
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How to Have a Healthy Argument:
The Win-Win Model
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Marital Entropy
Marital Entropy is the principle that if a
marriage does not receive preventive
maintenance and upgrades it will move
towards decay and break down.
What then can be done to prevent it?
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Inhibitions to Open
Communication and Trust
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Non-Verbal Communication
What role does non-verbal communication
Non-verbal communication includes touch,
gestures, facial expression, eye contact,
distance, and overall body positioning
What does out non-verbal communication
say about us?
Gender and communication?
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Types of Nonverbal
Communication
Paralanguage
All the vocal aspects of speech other than
words.
Body language
The silent movement of body parts.
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Types of Nonverbal
Communication
Interpersonal spacing cues
Positioning ourselves at varying distances
and angles from others.
Personal effects
What a person wears that communicates
information about that person.
In addition to the approximate 250,000
different facial expressions that humans
can make, nonverbal communication uses
many other bodily and gestural cues.
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President Bush’s 2005
Inauguration
 President Bush did not
know that:
 In Mediterranean
cultures, this gesture
implies that a man has
an unfaithful wife.
 In parts of Africa it is
used to impose a curse
on another person.
 Can you think of a time
when you
unintentionally
communicated
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Are Men from Mars and Women
from Venus?
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