Download Promising Young Composer Dies Bizarre Death

Promising Young
Composer Dies Bizarre
Death
by Peter Cherches
Promising Young Composer Dies Bizarre Death
PETALUMA, California, Apr. 14—The body of composer Andrew
McCall was found at his home in Petaluma, an apparent homicide,
Sonoma County police officials report.
Immediate cause of death has not yet been determined,
but according to coroner Vincent Skeleti, “This is the most bizarre
case I have come across in my twenty years of service. The flesh of
the deceased had been expertly carved away from the bone and then
replaced on the frame. The face of the deceased bore a pleased
expression.”
Judy knelt. She was not a religious woman. Robert would
enter from the rear. The doggy position. Not a particularly
respectable position for a woman in mourning.
McCall, a self-taught musician, had in recent months been
the object of much attention from the musical establishment. He was
the recipient of numerous awards, including the Southwest Critics'
Award for Promising Young Composer, and the Gualala Prize in 2012
for his composition “Fear and Loathing for Two Violins and
Marimba.”
McCall was 31 years old. He leaves a wife, Judy.
When Andrew married Judy he was studying to become a
podiatrist. Judy believed Andrew had a future in feet. Even Andrew
did not suspect a change in direction.
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Robert began to playfully nip at Judy's doggy-positioned
buttocks.
Judy was a nice Jewish girl from a nice Jewish family. Her
parents' indignation over the news that their daughter was marrying
a shagetz was mitigated by the fact that at least the shagetz was
going to be a doctor. So you can imagine their surprise and
disappointment when Andrew announced that he was abandoning
his podiatric ambitions in order to devote all his time to writing
music.
It had been a precipitous decision on Andrew's part. One
day he was playing his Hohner Blues Harp harmonica while listening
to a recording of Webern's “Six Bagatelles for String Quartet,” and
was overwhelmed by the freshness of what he heard. He
immediately set out to write a dialogue for harmonica and string
quartet, which he titled “Bows and Blues.” Having had no formal
training, Andrew's string writing was rather crude, but the piece
was nonetheless received as a work of great daring and imagination.
His first success.
Robert grasped Judy's breasts and thrust. The first
movement.
Andrew's next composition was “Fear and Loathing for
Two Violins and Marimba,” which earned him the coveted Gualala
Prize.
Soon after the Southwest Critics' Association named him
the year's most promising young composer. Andrew was gaining
recognition. Recognition, unfortunately, does not necessarily pay the
rent, so Judy took a job as a waitress at a local Steer and Beer
restaurant in order to pay the bills. It was about this time that
Andrew and Judy's marital problems began. With Judy working and
Andrew spending most of his time composing in solitude, they
hardly ever saw each other. In the ensuing months, Andrew and
Judy's sexual encounters became less and less frequent.
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Robert caressed expanses of Judy's flesh. Judy was
responsive but a bit distracted, this being but a week after Andrew's
death.
Andrew's Op. 3, “Eek, a Mouse!” was scored for soprano
voice and piano. Its premiere at San Francisco's Davies Hall was a
triumph. Critics compared the work (in spirit, if not in scope) to such
compositions as Prokofiev's “Peter and the Wolf” and Saint-Saëns'
“Carnival of Animals.”
Judy began to purr like a cat. Like a kitty-cat in the doggy
position.
Andrew's greatest success, the piece he will be most
remembered for, his Opus 4, was “Afternoon of an Electric
Toothbrush.” The title derives from the fact that the work was first
conceived when the composer was brushing his teeth with a Braun
Oral-B while listening to a scratchy old LP of Richard Strauss'
“Death and Transfiguration” at 2PM. The recording was released
about a week before Andrew's death.
This disc represents the first recording of McCall's most
romantic composition to date, “Afternoon of an Electric Toothbrush.”
McCall's mature use of controlled dynamics creates an atmosphere
of eroticism sorely missing from contemporary American
composition. There is something of a Wagnerian flavor to the piece,
and it has been called, by one astute critic, “a Liebstod for Madison
Avenue.”
The piece premiered at San Francisco's Symphony Hall,
and subsequently has been heard at major concert venues
throughout the world. The composition represents, to this listener's
ears, conciliation between technology and the libido. McCall's most
original vision, it is also his first piece to be scored for
unconventional instrumentation.
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Ernest Weinberg, who performs the work, is a graduate of
the Juilliard School and the NYU School of Dentistry.
Robert and Judy began to moan ecstatically, sounding like
a duet from Rossini.
Andrew and Judy's marital problems came to a head
during the composition of “Afternoon of an Electric Toothbrush.”
“Andrew,” Judy said, “you've changed. You don't even
touch me any more. You've become a stranger.”
“We must make sacrifices for our art.”
“Our art?”
It was the lack of sexual contact with her husband that
sent Judy into the arms of Robert. Robert (never Bob, Bobby, Rob or
Robbie) was a bartender at the restaurant where Judy worked.
Robert had been making advances for months, but Judy kept her
distance until her frustration finally got the best of her. Robert was
really sexy, and Judy had wondered from the outset what it might be
like to sleep with him.
The two lovers hit it off the first time together, and it
quickly evolved into a serious affair. Judy did have pangs of guilt at
first, but as Andrew became more and more involved in his work she
realized it was about time she started giving herself a fair shake.
And Andrew never suspected a thing. He was too preoccupied with
his newfound fame.
INTERNATIONAL ACCLAIM FOR ANDREW McCALL
“McCall is a promising young composer.” — New York Times
“McCall is a young composer with a promising future.” — San
Francisco Chronicle
“It has become quite evident that Andrew McCall is America's
most promising young composer.” — The Times of London
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“Jung! Vielversprechend!” — Der Spiegel
Judy was at the end of her rope. Andrew was spending
every waking moment on his music, making strange noises,
experimenting with all sorts of odd instruments. And when he wasn't
composing, he and Judy were arguing. Only when she was with
Robert was Judy able to relax.
At the time of his death, Andrew had begun work on his
Opus 5, “Fallen Arches,” a work for percussion ensemble. Andrew
was trying to get back to his roots. The piece was to be in three
movements, “Flatfoot (Adagio),” “Orthotics (Andante),” and
“Recovery (Allegro Molto Vivace).” But Andrew never got around to
“Recovery.” His death came before he had completed “Orthotics.”
Judy returned from food shopping one afternoon and
heard a startlingly loud noise. The shock caused her to drop her
bags, breaking bottles and eggs. She ran toward the bedroom,
where the noise was coming from. It was the recording of “Afternoon
of an Electric Toothbrush,” blasting through the speakers with the
18-inch woofers. Andrew was lying on the bed, completely nude,
holding the score to “Afternoon of an Electric Toothbrush” in his
right hand, masturbating with his left (he was a southpaw).
Crescendo.
Robert and Judy came in unison.
Judy acted impulsively. She ran into the kitchen and
grabbed the electric carving knife, Hamilton Beach. Andrew never
knew what hit him.
Afterwards, Judy lit a cigarette.
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