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Battling Depression
in
High Achievers/Perfectionists
Candice Conner, PsyD
Perfectionism:
Multidimensional personality trait characterized by …
*Striving for flawlessness
*Setting excessively high performance standards
*Having overly critical self-evaluations
*Worrying about others’ evaluations
Positive and negative aspects; however, research indicates that
constant striving for perfection can reduce (not increase) productivity
and achievement. (Flatt, G. York University) It can also lead to anxiety,
depression, eating disorders, and self-injury.
Perfectionism vs. High Achievers
• High achievers are satisfied with doing well even if they do not meet
their very high goals.
• Perfectionists accept nothing less than perfection. Almost perfect is
seen as failure. May become hysterical over one missed question.
• Perfectionists are more critical of self and others.
• High achievers are more easy going and happier.
• Perfectionists set goals that are out of reach, become anxious about
dreaded failure, are not able to enjoy the process.
• High achievers set goals that are obtainable, enjoy the process as well
as the outcome.
Unhealthy Habits of Perfectionism
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Procrastination – Become paralyzed with fear of not achieving perfection
Defensiveness – See all comments about performance as failure
Low self-esteem – Unrealistic view of self, unhappy
Loss of sleep – Leads to memory and retention problems
Social isolation – Due to feeling overwhelmed by expectations (self and
others)
• Presenting a perfect facade – Refuse to seek help when needed
• Obsessive compulsive behavior – Irrational behaviors can develop around
quest for perfection (i.e. inability to stop checking work for mistakes)
Unhealthy Habits of Perfectionism… (continued)
• Performance drugs – Adderall and other medications prescribed for
the treatment of ADHD may be used illegally to increase focus.
According to an FDA study (2015), prescriptions for these meds increased by 46% in
past decade.
Abuse of prescription stimulants can lead to depression and mood swings (from sleep deprivation),
heart irregularities, and acute exhaustion or psychosis during withdrawal. Little is known about the
long-term effects of abuse of stimulants among teens.
• Excessive use of coffee/caffeine drinks – Increase alertness for a short
period, but may cause nervousness, insomnia, irritability, anxiety .
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that adolescents should not consume more than
100 mg of caffeine a day.
A Grande coffee from Starbucks has approximately 330 mg of caffeine, a 5-Hour Energy has 208 mg,
and a soft drink has 50 mg.
Your Perfectionistic Teen
• Worry/anxiety
• Lack of enjoyment in working towards goals
• Loss of sleep
• Low self-esteem
• Overly critical of self
• Social Isolation
• Fear of seeking help
• Obsessive compulsive behaviors
• Lack of coping skills
Depression:
Symptoms In Adolescents May Include…
Depressed mood/Sadness
Irritability/anger
Feeling worthless/negativity/hopeless
Inability to focus
Change in school attendance/performance
Substance use
Change in appetite/sleep patterns
Loss of interest in normal activities
Avoidance of social interaction
Suicidal Ideation/Attempt(s)
Gifted and Talented Students
Gifted and talented students report problems
such as:
+ Competiveness
+ Unrealistic appraisal of their gifts
+ Confusion due to mixed messages about their talents
+ Parental and social pressures to achieve
+ Often feel they are expected to do more and be more than their
abilities allow
Suicide in The United States
• Suicide is the third leading cause of death of young people between the
ages of 15 and 24.
• 5,000 young people complete suicide in the U.S. each year.
• Each day, there are approximately 12 youth suicides.
• In the past 60 years, the suicide rate has quadrupled for males 15 to 24
years old, and has doubled for females of the same age.
• For every completed suicide by youth, it is estimated that 100 to 200
attempts are made.
Suicide and Crisis Center of North Texas (2016)
Depression and Suicide
20% of the adolescent population experiences symptoms of depression
at some point, according to the American Psychological Association.
Of this 20%, only 30% get professional treatment for depression,
leaving many teens struggling to cope without help.
Adolescent males are four times more likely to commit suicide than
adolescent females; however, adolescent females attempt suicide twice
as often as male teens.
In a given year approximately 1 out of every ten high school students
report having attempted suicide (Youth Suicide Prevention Program,
2011).
Suicide Risk and Substance Use
•19.6 percent of young people who reported using alcohol were found to be
at risk of suicide. Only 8.6 percent of young people who did not report using
alcohol were at risk.
•25.4 percent of young people who reported using illicit drugs were found to
be at risk of suicide. Only 9.2 percent of young people who did not report
using drugs were at risk.
(SAMHSA, 2002)
Common Characteristics of Suicide
• The common stimulus for suicide is unbearable psychological pain.
Conflict between survival and agonizing stress. Reduce the
suffering.
• The common stressor in suicide is unfulfilled psychological needs.
Suicides derive from unmet needs. Address these need(s).
• The common purpose of suicide is to seek a solution.
Suicide is not a random act. It is a way out of a problem,
dilemma, or crisis. Find answers, resolve the issue, to solve
the problem.
• The common emotions in suicide are hopelessness and helplessness.
The common fear is that the suffering is endless. Coping skills.
Common Characteristics of Suicide (cont.)
• The common internal attitude toward suicide is ambivalence.
A classic suicidal state is one in which the person feels that he/she
has to do it, yet hopes and plans for rescue and intervention.
• The common cognitive state in suicide is tunnel vision.
Suicide cannot be understood as a psychosis, a neurosis, or a character
disorder. It is the loss of range of options = either/or thinking.
The common interpersonal act in suicide is communication of intention.
It can be a cry, shout, murmur, or the nonverbal communication of
something unspoken. The communication is not always for help.
However, in most suicides there is some interpersonal
communication related to that intended final act.
Adapted from Definition of Suicide by Edwin Schneidman
What Can Parents Do?
Praise teen’s internal character and not external measures of character.
Allow your teen to make errors and experience negative consequences.
Evaluate the messages that you are giving him/her. (i.e. All A’s are bust)
Focus on the importance of learning new material or a new skill, rather than on scores
and/or being the best.
Address irrational thinking in your teen (i.e. “I’m an awful person because I made a
68”; “I won’t get into a good college, because I’m making a C”).
What Can Parents Do? (continued)
Do not brush off symptoms of anxiety/depression. Seek professional help immediately.
Help teen(s) engage in activities that do not involve scoring or competition.
Talk to your teen about errors you (their parents) have made, so they realize that not even
you are perfect.
Help them understand that social media does not show all of the hardships/errors
others experience.
Allow them to only compare their efforts to their efforts – not to others, and you do
the same. Focus on their areas of competence.
Show unconditional love and acceptance.
What Can Parents Do? (continued)
Promote spiritual faith and/or regular church attendance
Promote cultural, family values, and/or religious beliefs that affirm life
and discourage suicide
Teach resilience: ongoing or continuing sense of hope in the face of
adversity
Teach and role model frustration tolerance and emotional regulation
Encourage healthy body image, care, and protection.
No fat or thin talk.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.”
Theodore Roosevelt