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Interpersonal Communication… Why All the Fuss? Presented by… Chance McDavid, Vice President Greater Starkville Development Partnership August 25, 2007 Why Do We Communicate? Activity…How Are Your Communication Skills? We are bombarded by thousands of messages every day. What makes this message easy to communicate? Why do we pay attention to it? Speaking of Stop Signs… Say What??? Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." -Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest Communication Defined • n. The exchange of thoughts, messages, or information, as by speech, signals, or writing. The American Heritage Dictionary 2nd. Ed . Communication Is How We Let Others Know… • What we are thinking. • How we are feeling. • “Who says what to whom in what channel with what effect.” Communication Process (Message) Sender Channel NOISE Feedback Loop Receiver “Communication is not intent, it is perception!” 3 Parts of Oral Communication: Words Tone Body Language How we say something is as important as what we say! What Causes Perceptions? Beliefs Attitudes What’s Important Communication Skills ? Past Events Self Esteem How Can I Limit Perceptions? • Be open-minded. • Respect yourself and others. • Be open and honest. • Actively listen. What Communicates Verbal Vocal Visual Total 7% _____ 38 % _____ 55 % _____ Words Tone Body Language* 100 % “You are the only book some people will ever read.” Mehrabian, Albert. Silent Messages, 1971. It’s Not What You Say… It’s How You Say It! It Does Make A Difference… I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. I never said I saw him take the money. Or Even How You Write It… The Problem… • I speak at 125 wpm • I hear at 400 wpm • I think at 4000 wpm “Speaking is a lousy input for communication.” Communicating Without Words • • • • • • S mile O pen Posture F orward Lean T erritory E ye Contact N od 55% Visual Ingredients of Interpersonal Communication • Vocal Delivery • Visual Elements • Personality • Likeability • Openness Specific Behavioral Characteristics • Eye Communication • Posture/Movement • Gestures/Facial Expression • Dress/Appearance • Voice/Vocal Variety • • • • Language/Non Words Listener Involvement Humor The Natural Self – “An Attitude” Activity…How Do Your Behavioral Characteristics Stack Up? • You cannot (not) communicate. • “Once a word goes out of your mouth, you can never swallow it again.” -Russian Proverb • No form of communication is simple. • Communication doesn’t occur in a vacuum. And Finally… • You can compare the communication process to Murphy’s Law: – If communication can fail, it will. – If a message can be understood in different ways, it will be understood in just that way which does the most harm. – There is always somebody who knows better than you what you meant by your message. – The more communication there is, the more difficult it is for communication to succeed. – Osmo Wiio Chance L. McDavid, Vice President Membership & Community Development Greater Starkville Development Partnership [email protected] (662) 323-3322 200 East Main Street Starkville, MS 39759 Visit us at www.starkville.org