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Graduate Diploma
Reading & Writing
Spring Term Session 10
Data Commentary Feedback
Reporting Verbs & Patterns Review
Finding Suitable Sources
Combining Sources
A WORD ABOUT MY
FEEDBACK STYLE
Your commentary has a good opening, although I think the word “total” is missing
from before “weight” and “we can informed ourselves” is both grammatically
incorrect and unnecessary. Be careful when you use comparative and superlative
forms. It is not possible to mix the two. For example, it is fine to say “Japan has
the most ships” but you cannot continue this sentence with “than”. It is also a
mistake to use “most” with superlative forms like “biggest” or “heaviest”. The –est
suffix in these words means “most”.
You do a good job of incorporating the data within your own sentence structures,
but you should be aware that you cannot use “that” and “how” together in the
same sentence. Just choose one of these. Likewise “under” and “from” should
not appear next to each other in English. Overall, though, a good attempt at a
data commentary. Have a look at the Economist’s version and see what
differences you find:
SOME USEFUL VERBS AND
VERB PATTERNS
(WHICH YOU SHOULD
ALREADY KNOW)
Verbs followed by a noun
Verbs followed by that
phrase
e.g. Table 5 shows the most
e.g. Table 5 shows that e-mail
common sources of infection.
attachments are the most
common source of infection.
Verbs followed by a noun phrase
Verbs followed by that
e.g. Table 5 shows the most
e.g. Table 5 shows that e-mail
common sources of infection.
attachments are the most common
source of infection.
show
show
provide
illustrate
give
reveal
present
demonstrate
summarize
indicate
illustrate
suggest
reveal
display
demonstrate
indicate
EVALUATING SOURCES
When you find an article to read, how can you tell if
it is useful to you? What questions can you ask
about the text?
•who wrote it?
•when was it written?
•where and when was it published?
•is any data referred to or is it just opinion?
•what is the source of the data provided?
•does the writer or publisher have a vested interest in the
subject?
•is it written in English?
http://www.economist.com/displaystory.cfm?story_id=14843667
http://www.economist.com/world/middleeastafrica/displaystory.cfm?story_id=E1_TNGSVTPR&source=login_payBarrier
http://www.economist.com/world/international/displaystory.cfm?story_id=E1_TT
QVVDDG&source=login_payBarrier
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ethics/capitalpunishment/intro.shtml
http://www.amnesty.org/en/death-penalty/numbers
http://www.deathpenaltyinfo.org/
http://news.bbc.co.uk/today/hi/today/newsid_7649000/7649965.stm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corporal_punishment
http://www.corpun.com/
www.essex.ac.uk
BEFORE THE END OF THE
WEEK, YOU NEED TO SHOW
ME 3 OR 4 ARTICLES THAT
YOU INTEND TO USE AS
YOUR SOURCES
COMBINING SOURCES
Marriage
1. "A man is only as faithful as his opportunity." (Chris Rock)
2. "Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into
it, deserves all the consequences." (Isadora Duncan)
3. "Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." (Oscar
Wilde)
4. "I don't think it's the nature of any man to be monogamous. Men are
propelled by genetically ordained impulses over which they have no control
to distribute their seed." (Marlon Brando)
5. "It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy
marriages." (Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche)
6. "The easiest kind of relationship is with ten thousand people; the hardest is
with one." (Joan Baez)
7. "When a girl marries, she exchanges the attentions of all the other men of
her acquaintance for the inattention of just one." (Helen Rowland)