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Verbal and Non-verbal Communication Patterns
DECEMBER 6, 2012
According to Martin and Nakayama, (2010), non-verbal communication is the act of communicating
using forms of communication beyond speech. These include facial expression, personal space, gestures,
eye contact, paralanguage, use of time, and conversational silence. Comparitively, the New Oxford
Dictionary, (2005), defines verbal communication as communication relating to or in the form of words.
This includes spoken or oral rather than written communication. Both forms of expression can be used
to effectively communicate with one another. People all over the World also express themselves through
verbal or non-verbal behaviors. These behaviors can be influenced by multiple factors. Some of these
include culture, ethnicity and gender. Understanding the factors that effect communication, whether
verbal or non-verbal, can help us a society to be more open minded towards others who may not express
themselves in the same manor as we do.
Non-verbal communication can be vastly different from one culture to the next. This is seen in forms of
greeting or parting. The message the action relays can be very different depending on the person and
location and it’s meaning crucial. According to Raymond Firth, (1972), a greeting or parting sign is often
represented as conveying information and/or expressing emotion. He continues to say, as with all social
relationships, reciprocity is important; an expectation in greeting is that it will elicit social recognition in
return. Lastly he adds that there is a great variety of custom in greeting and parting behavior across the
world. Limited as the components for expressing that greeting or parting are, their expressive power is
considerable and their social implications of great sensitivity. This is why it is so important to recognize
the differences in non-verbal communication between cultures. We as Americans might shake hands to
greet someone, whereas the Explore China Tours website, (n.p.), details that the Chinese people use a
brief handshake and lower their eyes slightly to convey the same greeting. It is important to understand
that different cultures express the same messages in different ways so as to not offend or misunderstand
a non-verbal greeting.
Chinese verbal greetings are also different from the American formal greetings in that a Chinese verbal
greeting includes speaking an individual’s surname, followed by their title, so as to show recognition of
that individual’s social class and rank. Americans are not as formal in their greetings. Although we have
titles for people of power or great position, such as the President of the United States, using Mr. or Mrs.
as an official title will typically suffice for others in reference to a greeting.
Another non-verbal way of communicating in relation to our specific cultures is through cultural spaces,
such as our homes. Martin and Nakayama, (2010), tell us that the kind of furniture within a home, to the
way the television is situated, are signs of social class. We often model our homes after that of our
childhood. It can be assumed that we also model our patterns of verbal and non-verbal communication
after our childhood experiences.
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Not only do cultures effect an individuals form of communication, but ethnicity can also lead to trends
or patterns in non-verbal or verbal behaviors. An ethnic, non-verbal form of communication may
include the style of dress. Martin and Nakayama, (2010), state that one of the problems with identifying
cultural variations in nonverbal codes is that it is tempting to overgeneralize these variations and
stereotype people. For example, the stereotyping of individuals who are non-verbally expressing their
beliefs through clothing items such as turbins or hijabs has led to hate crimes and other acts of violence.
In an anonymous article, (2011), it is stated that after the tragic events of 9/11, hate crimes towards
Muslims skyrocketed in the United States. Recently, Sikhs have been targeted because their non-verbal
expression of their religion including their dress and hairstyles are similar to those of the Muslim
religion. The most recent attack was the shooting at a Sikh temple in Wisconsin. According to the
Washington Post, (2012), Wade Michael Page, a 40-year-old Army veteran, walked into the Sikh temple
in Oak Creek, WI shortly before Sunday services were set to begin and opened fire. He killed six people
and wounded three. He also wounded the first police officer to respond to the scene. Perhaps this hate
crime could have been prevented if he and we better understood the non-verbal expressions of ethnic
groups other than our own.
Ethnicity also plays a role in verbal communication and the stereotypes that arise there. In a journal
excerpt by Epstein, Jeffrey N.; Willoughby, Michael; Valencia, Elvia Y.; Tonev, Simon T.; Abikoff, Howard
B.; Arnold, L. Eugene; Hinshaw, Stephen P., (2005), a study was conducted to review the relationship
between a teacher’s ratings of children with learning and behavior disorders in relation to the child’s
ethnicity. It was undetermined if the ratings were subject to the teacher’s bias or actual circumstances,
but the ethnicity of the children were supposed to be directly related to the exhibited behaviors.
According to the journal, those with African American ethnic backgrounds were more commonly rated
as if there was a learning disability present. Therefore, ethnicity can play a part in an individual’s verbal
communication patterns and we need to be aware of the tendency to stereotype a person, based on their
ethnic background.
Non-verbal and verbal communication can be very different when it comes to the male and female
genders. Perhaps the most differences are documented in relationships between the two sexes. In an
excerpt from Gary Chapman, (1992), he states: “If we are to communicate effectively across cultural
lines, we must learn the language of those with whom we wish to communicate. In the area of love, it is
similar. Your emotional love language and the language of your spouse may be as different as Chinese
from English. No matter how hard you try to express love in English, if your spouse understands only
Chinese, you will never understand how to love each other.” Chapman goes on to say: “Seldom do a
husband and wife have the same primary emotional love language. We tend to speak our primary love
language, and we become confused when our spouse does not understand what we are communicating.
We are expressing our love, but the message does not come through because we are speaking what, to
them, is a foreign language. Therein lies the fundamental problem.”
Chapman speaks of five languages men and women use to communicate their feelings towards one
another. Theses languages are both verbal and non-verbal. The non-verbal languages include: ‘quality
time,’ ‘receiving gifts,’ ‘acts of service’ and ‘physical touch.’ The only verbal language he describes is:
‘words of affirmation.’ Although a person’s way of receiving and showing their feelings can differ, the
majority of how people express themselves in intimate relationships is through non-verbal
communication. This is why it is so important to learn about the different ways men and women
communicate, whether verbally or non-verbally, so as to better understand one another and create better
relationships.
There are also non-verbal and verbal forms of communication between individuals of different genders
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in a professional setting. An experiment was conducted including a multichannel investigation of how
gender-based familiarity moderates verbal and nonverbal behaviors between men and women.
According to Dovidio, John F.; Brown, Clifford E.; Heltman, Karen; Ellyson, Steve L.; Keating, Caroline
F., (1988), the verbal behaviors examined were speech initiations and total amount of speech; the
nonverbal behaviors studied were visual behavior (while speaking and while listening), gesturing, chin
thrusts, and smiling. Across all conditions, women smiled more often than did men, and men had a
higher frequency of chin thrusts than did women. It was concluded that these verbal and non-verbal
behaviors were directly related to social power. Verbal and non-verbal communication differences can
also be seen in same gender relationships.
In conclusion, because people all over the world communicate with one another via verbal and nonverbal communication, it is important to understand the differences and implications from one culture
to another. It is also important to understand how ethnicity may impact a person’s verbal or non-verbal
communication skills. It is easy to stereotype others if we do not understand their backgrounds or
reasons for why they communicate the way that they do.
Lastly, verbal and non-verbal communication play a big part in how people of the same or opposite
genders interact with one another. These interactions can include a vast array of relationships, including
husband and wife relationships, female to female relationships, and others. Gender communication
differences also exist in a more professional setting, such as an office. Good communication requires and
understanding of each other and the differences in verbal and non-verbal tendencies another person
may possess.
Understanding the factors that effect communication, whether verbal or non-verbal, can help us a
society to be more open minded towards others who may not express themselves in the same manor as
we do.
References
1) Chapman, Gary. (1992). The 5 Love Languages. Chicago, IL: Northfield Publishing.
2) Chinese Etiquette and Courtesies (n.p.) In Explore China Tours. Retrieved December 3, 2012 from
http://www.explorechinatours.com/chinatravel_infor/greeting_etiquette.html.
3) Dovidio, John F.; Brown, Clifford E.; Heltman, Karen; Ellyson, Steve L.; Keating, Caroline F., (1988).
Power displays between women and men in discussions of gender-linked tasks: A multichannel study.
Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 55(4), 580-587. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.55.4.580
4) Epstein, Jeffrey N.; Willoughby, Michael; Valencia, Elvia Y.; Tonev, Simon T.; Abikoff, Howard B.;
Arnold, L. Eugene; Hinshaw, Stephen P. (2005). The Role of Children’s Ethnicity in the Relationship
Between Teacher Ratings of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder and Observed Classroom
Behavior. Journal of Consulting and Climical Psychology, 73 (3), 424-434. doi: 10.1037/0022-006X.73.3.424
5) Firth, Raymond. (1972). The Interpretation of Ritual (pp. 1-2). London, UK: Routledge Library Editions.
6) Martin, Judith N., & Nakayama, Thomas K. (2010) Intercultural Communication in Contexts (pp. 267,
281, 288). New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.
7) New Oxford American Dictionary. (Version 2.1.3, 80.4). (2005). Apple, Inc.
8) Richmond, Todd. (2012, November 20). FBI Concludes Sikh Temple Shooter Acted Alone. The
10/21/21, 3:35 PM
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Washington Post.
9) Southern Poverty Law Center. (2011). 9/11 Anniversary Sparks Hate Crimes Against Muslims.
Retrieved December 3, 2012, <http://www.splcenter.org>.