Download The SOS approach to Recovery from Food Addiction

The S.O.S. approach to
Recovery from Food Addiction
Contributed by an anonymous S.O.S. member
“Most people think of SOS as a secular organization for alcoholics. I am
a compulsive overeater and have struggled with a severe weight
problem most of my adult life. Yet I have used SOS principles and gone
from 196 to 110 pounds in 18 months. Even more importantly, I've
maintained my current weight for a year.
My problems with food started early. For as long as I can remember, it
has been a magical source of comfort and enjoyment for me. As a child,
I eagerly anticipated meats with my favorite dishes, and while eating,
felt transported into a private, wondrous realm. Food gave me a high,
and I turned to it in response to nearly every strong emotion. I ate to
relieve tension, anger, and depression, as well as to celebrate and even
just to break the boredom. Though I overate as a child, I did not
develop a weight problem until adolescence, when I gained many
pounds in a few years.
In college, I went on serious eating binges where I quickly stuffed
myself with junk food. I swung between binge periods and months of
strict dieting, entering the classic weight-loss yo-yo. I would lose some
weight, then put it all back on and gain even more, then shed further
pounds, then regain them. In the five years before joining SOS, I had
yo-yoed up to almost 200 pounds-quite obese for a 5'2" woman.
I felt horribly disgusted with myself for being so fat, but I was even more
frightened by feeling that I was completely out of control. I felt I could
not stop. eating until I was totally stuffed. I often could not fall asleep
unless I had binged before going to bed and was nearly sick to my
stomach.! was going to great lengths to hide my binges from my family
and friends. I often bought bags full of drive-in fast foods and binged on
them in the car. I then threw away the wrappers and frantically tried to
air out the car so my husband wouldn't discover what I'd done.
Before SOS, I had achieved my most sustained weight loss in a 12-step
program for overeaters. The program exhilarated me at first. I loved the
group support. For the first time in my life, I was talking with people
who had done the same crazy things with food that I had. It helped
relieve the shame and isolation. I also found that calling group members
when things got bad was very helpful.
However, because I never believed in a higher power who could take
responsibility for my recovery, I grew more and more disenchanted with
the 12-step approach. Yet I was always too frightened to voice my true
feelings, especially when members told me that doubting the higher
power showed vanity, ego, and denial of my problem. I often heard that
it wasn't enough to eat sensibly, lose weight, and rely on group
support. If I didn't somehow complete this mysterious journey through
the 12 steps, I would return to overeating. Because I was both
frightened and grateful1 I tried to play along, but after a while, I began
to feel fraudulent and ashamed. I also wearied of the mental
calisthenics of translating 12-step jargon into concepts that I could
accept. Eventually, I stopped attending O.A. meetings and regained all
the weight I had lost.
When I heard about SOS over two years ago, I was desperate. The 12step program had aided me temporarily, but I could not imagine
pretending again that a spiritual approach would lead me to recovery.
Yet I knew I needed help. I attended a Los Angeles SOS meeting, and
though the other members were primarily alcoholics or drug abusers,
they said a lot that was important”.
Since then, I've used many SOS principles in my own recovery
(adjusting them here and there to address the differences between
alcohol and food problems). For example, I believe that I must
acknowledge that I am a compulsive overeater. I must accept the fact
that I have a food problem - whether genetic, physical, psychological,
or some mixture of all of them - and I must change my eating and
lifestyle to keep myself from bingeing, weight gain, and poor health.
Through hard experience, I've come to believe that my overeating could
threaten my life. I could slowly kill myself with health problems from the
yo-yoing weight gain and pernicious junk-food diet of compulsive
overeating.
I also separate my eating and behavior program -- my "abstinence"-from all other issues in my life. I don't use food to deal with my
emotions, and I don't use problems as an excuse for overeating.
I've also found that the SOS emphasis on rational, critical thinking, and
individual responsibility is especially helpful for overeaters. Overeaters
have a different relation to food than alcoholics do to alcohol.
Alcoholics must make One Big Decision -- not to drink. But overeaters,
like everyone else, must eat to survive. At least three or four times
everyday, we must make decisions about food, and we must choose
when, where, what, and how much to eat. It is therefore crucial that
overeaters learn sound, responsible decision-making. Surrendering
these choices to a higher power may be one of the worst things an
overeater can do.
Instead, to create my program of recovery, I critically assessed the
different approaches to nutrition and behavior modification. I also
looked to my own experience. Overeaters are diverse. For instance, we
often have trouble with different kinds of foods. I usually binged on
greasy, fried food, but others may tend to sugary foods or foods with
white flour. Given the complexities of the situation and the puzzles of
human metabolism, one person's ideal program may be another's iron
maiden.
I developed an approach that has succeeded for me. It involves: . A low
fat, high complex carbohydrate diet. . Avoidance of foods that triggered
binges in the past. . Behavioral techniques that help me recognize when
I have just satisfied my physiological hunger, and when my desire to eat
is emotional rather than physical. . Planning ahead, so I have time to
prepare meals that fit in with my food program. . Weighing and
measuring my food occasionally, so I know how much I'm eating. .
Exercise. Bike riding, jogging, and weight lifting have been crucial to my
recovery. They not only burn calories, but kilt appetite. They also
vaporize the tensions than can cause binges in the first place.
My program is not "the program". That program does not exist. But the
SOS approach is highly favorable for overeaters to fashion the program
that suits them.
I would make the following suggestions for people with food problems overeaters as well as bulimics, anorexics, and others - who wish either
to attend SOS meetings with alcoholics and other drug abusers or to
start separate
meetings.
Create your own food and behavior modification program -- your own
abstinence -- but don't impose it on others. Consistent with the SOS
emphasis on individual responsibility for recovery, group members
should retain responsibility for decisions about their abstinence. Too
many times we've been subjected to rigid, prefabricated diets that
ignored our individuality, then been made to feel guilty because and
humiliated if we couldn't stick to them. Therefore, there should be no
uniform SOS food or behavior program no "official" SOS diet. Instead,
SOS meetings can be a forum where individuals with food problems
share their experiences about what works for them, and discuss
nutrition and eating behavior rationally and critically.
Start simply. Part of the appeal of a rigid program is that beginners can
start at once. The drawback is that they can't progress. Since the SOS
approach lacks hard structure, newcomers may have difficulty getting
started. Some may feel they require a preset pattern. These individuals
can consult a doctor or nutrition specialist, or adopt some food
program that has worked for them in the past. But others may simply
feel overwhelmed by the responsibility for making massive and complex
changes in their eating and behavior. These people can begin with
simple changes. A newcomer could decide to stop eating while
watching television, or between meals, or in the car. He or she could
swear off two or three foods that have triggered binges. Once started,
the newcomer can set a time - one month, two months - and at the end
of it, evaluate the effect of the changes and the desirability of further
ones. This reassessment should continue periodically, until the
newcomer develops and fine-tunes a working personal program.
Take advantage of the group support of alcoholics and other drug
abusers at SOS meetings. Despite the different problems, I strongly
believe that people with food problems can benefit from these
meetings. I was very fortunate to be warmly welcomed at the Los
Angeles meetings I first attended, though for a long time I was the only
overeater present. I found discussions on the difficulties of facing life
without relying on my drug of choice to be particularly helpful and I very
much empathized with other people's struggle for recovery.
In areas with too few people for food-oriented SOS meetings, it is
especially important that existing SOS meetings permit overeaters to
attend. Many overeaters are desperate for secular group support, yet
either lack the resources for commercial weight loss programs or dislike
their rigid diets. SOS can help these individuals, and the lack of
overeater SOS meetings need not prevent them from obtaining the
support they need.
Since I began a secular approach to recovery, my life has improved
dramatically. I've lost 86 pounds and dropped down through eight
dress sizes. I can now enjoy many kinds of physical activity. Small
changes continue to excite and amaze me. My car doesn't always smell
like food. I can actually stop when I've eaten enough, and leave food on
my plate. In the morning, I don't feel the bizarre mixture of nausea and
intense hunger that comes from bingeing the night before. I've been
able to maintain my self-respect and intellectual honesty throughout my
recovery. I haven't had to surrender my rational, critical faculties to deal
with my eating problems. Instead I've used them as allies. For me, it's
been indispensable”.