Download 1 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can`t Forgive Myself

 UNSPOKEN: I CAN’T FORGIVE MYSELF 1 JOHN 1:8­10 December 9, 2012 INTRODUCTION: Have you ever said, “I can’t believe I did that.” Ever wished you had not said that? I often refer to such moments or times as “times of insanity.” “What was I thinking, or was I thinking?” “Where was my brain?” “At this moment God is quite unreal to us, He loses all reality, and only desire for the creature is real; the only reality is the devil. Satan does not here fill us with hatred of God, but with forgetfulness of God ... The lust thus aroused envelops the mind and will of man in deepest darkness. The powers of clear discrimination and of decision are taken from us.” Dietrich Bonhoeffer Have you ever felt ashamed of yourself? Ever wished you could retrieve a word, sentence, or conversation? Anything in your past haunt you? Ever done something you wished you had not done? Anyone join me in saying in their heart, “If I could take it back, I would.” How about, “I wish I could do that over.” 1 Kings 15:5, “ because David did what was right in the eyes of the Lord, and had not turned aside from anything that He commanded him all the days of his life, except in the matter of Uriah the Hittite.” Is there that one “major” regret in your life where you struggle forgiving yourself? This passage from the aged disciple, the Apostle John, should help us to realize that we are not alone. 1 John 1:8 “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” COUNSELOR’S HELP The struggle against self‐forgiveness is a symptom of a deeper heart issue, not the cause. This struggle is based upon possibly ignorance of the truth or an unwillingness to see one’s self as God sees them. There is a tension between two realities that is true for all believers: we are fallen and desperately in need of grace; we are deeply loved and accepted by God. Failure to embrace both realities, on a heart level, manifests itself in a variety of ways. THREE EXAMPLES: There are three distortions based upon the prideful assumption that I have a right to be my self‐appointed law giver and judge. On another note, these three barriers (distortions) are interlocking with one feeding the other. As a result, they keep believers (Christ followers) from living free. Before I give you the distortions, listen to the barriers: 1 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM
1. Failure to accept oneself. In Ps. 3, we have record of the Psalmist in trouble. Psalms 3:2, “Many are they who say of me, ‘There is no help for him in God.’" Selah ILL. Kenya children with bowed heads until an elder touches their head, then they lift their heads with such big smiles. Psalms 3:3­6, “But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, My glory and the One who lifts up my head. I cried to the Lord with my voice, And He heard me from His holy hill. Selah I lay down and slept; I awoke, for the Lord sustained me. I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people Who have set themselves against me all around.” “accept” – to receive willingly; used in marriage vows; it’s a favorable response (accept an offer) Ephesians 1:6, “to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved.” Believers are accepted in Him; then they, like Him, are beloved of God. 2. Failure to receive forgiveness for oneself. 3. Failure to grant forgiveness to others. Now note the distortions: 1. Overt Pride I don’t need God’s grace; I can make it on my own 2. Performance Trap I shouldn’t need God’s graces; I should be able to make it on my own 3. Self­hatred, Reverse Pride I am beyond God’s grace; I am left on my own PROBLEMS: These keep us from truly embracing God’s love and acceptance and coming to a place of self‐acceptance. 2 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM
THE ENEMY’S ALTERNATIVE: A quest to make it apart from God sets you on a path of attempting to find another way. Result: Believer is ensnared, rendered ineffective, God’s glory is stolen; not to mention, in bondage to guilt, shame, and fear. IMPORTANT TRUTH: Those who find it hard to forgive themselves are really struggling with receiving and embracing the gift of God’s forgiveness, love, and acceptance. Their continual self‐condemnation and self‐punishment reflect the fact that they have set their own standard, evaluated the behavior, and they have pronounced the verdict. THE ANSWER HERE: Surrender to the love of God the Father. See your sins aright. Ps 51:4, “Against You, You only, have I sinned, and done this evil in Your sight.” The Law­Giver is the For­Giver (I could get right with the offended and not be right with God. If I get right with God, I can get right with you and with myself.) Our forgiveness of others flows from a place of gratitude for the overwhelming grace and forgiveness we have been given. Luke 7:47, “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little." If your heart is grateful for receiving God’s forgiveness, you will be gracious in extending His forgiveness. Back to the Overt Pride. I don’t need God’s grace; I can make it on my own. True repentance (turn from sin to God), a change of mind, involves embracing reality as God defines it: we are fallen and desperately in need of grace; yet, we are deeply loved and accepted by God. Humility and gratitude are the fruit of holding the two realities in tandem. Failure to embrace the first part leads to the sin of pride. Failure to embrace the second part leads to the sin of self‐hatred, or reverse pride. The sin of pride suggests that one doesn’t need the gift of God’s grace. The sin of self­hatred is, in effect, reinstating the condemnation which Christ has set us free from. Romans 8:1a, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus” 3 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM
Performance Trap This sin suggests that Christ’s work is incomplete; His death gets me into heaven, but I must earn the Father’s love and acceptance. Recommendation: Repent of sinful pride that tells you that you have a right to evaluate and judge your worth as a person. Only our Creator/Savior has that right. Meditate upon the cross of Christ to the point of heartfelt gratitude for His complete (finished) work. “Jesus, I have no right to judge my own sin. I receive your forgiveness.” Meditate on the love of the Father Who freely gave His Son, thanking Him for His love, mercy, and grace. You may need to say to Him, “I have no right to hate the One You love (myself). I receive your love.” These are truths you need to tell yourself as a believer: I am totally and completely forgiven I am totally and completely loved by God God not only loves me, but He accepts me I am clothed in Christ’s righteousness and I am pleasing to God. PROBLEM: If a Christian can’t say this, that person is battling against truth and hating what/who God loves. This moves us to Self­hatred, Reverse Pride I am beyond God’s grace. I am left on my own The fact of the matter is that everyone talks to themselves. For example, the prodigal son, while in the pig pen (some of you are there now), attempted to evaluate his situation, judged himself as unworthy to be a son, proposed a solution to himself based upon his unworthiness, and rehearsed his speech of unworthiness. Luke 15:18, “I will arise and go to my father, and will say to him, "Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you” NOTE: The Father never listened to the speech, and only showed delight in His Son’s return. Implicit in the story is that the son had to let go of his self‐condemnation in order to truly experience the party the Father had thrown. Suppose the Father’s disappointment had the son resisted the party thrown in his honor and held onto his self‐condemnation and his verdict of unworthiness. 4 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM
Here’s A Good Talk to Have With Yourself Jesus has set me free. I have no right to condemn me, Jesus’ punishment was enough. I repent and refuse to punish me any longer. God forgives me, and I forgive me. The Father accepts me and I also will accept me. Now, thank God for His grace and mercy. Romans 8:1a, “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus” God has not only forgiven you, He has set aside condemnation and judgment to give you freedom from shame. This does not mean that there are not consequences that we must face, but it does mean that He will be with us to face these trials. Condemnation is used in judicial settings as the opposite of justification. It refers to a verdict of guilty and the penalty that verdict demands. No sin a believer can commit either past, present, or future can be held against him since the penalty was paid by Christ and righteousness was imputed to the believer. No sin will ever reverse this divine legal decision. Romans 8:33, “Who shall bring a charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies.” Divine Courtroom is the setting. It is God Who justifies! Who can successfully accuse someone who God has declared righteous? “I Am Free” Newsboys Through You, the blind will see Through You, the mute will sing Through You, the dead will rise Through You, all hearts will praise Through You, the darkness flees Through You, my heart screams I am free Yes, I am free I am free to run (I am free to run) I am free to dance (I am free to dance) I am free to live for You (I am free to live for You) I am free (I am free) Yes, I am free (I am free) 5 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM
Through You, the Kingdom comes Through You, the battle’s won Through You, I’m not afraid Through you, the price is paid Through You, there’s victory Because of You, my heart sings I am free Yes, I am free And I am free to run (I am free to run) And I am free to dance (I am free to dance) And I am free to live for You (I am free to live for You) I am free (I am free) Yes, I am free (I am free) Who the Son sets free, is free indeed (Now the Son sets free) Who the Son sets free, is free indeed (Now the Son sets free) 6 - Pastor Johnny M. Hunt | Unspoken: I Can’t Forgive Myself | December 9, 2012 AM