Download High School Teen Living

Program Title: High School Teen Living
Category: Teen Issues
Author(s): Jake Brown and Jon DeSantis
Created for: NFTY-PAR Fall Kallah 2005
Please Note: This program may be used "as-is," however; NFTYites are encouraged to "adapt"
programs, combining their own elements of innovation with this preexisting program.
Touchstone Text:
 “How is it that after being married to Sarai for some time, Avram first realizes her
beauty now? Tanchuma relates that they came to a river where he saw her reflection
and realized how beautiful she was.” - Genesis 12 verses 46-47
o Discusses how Abraham hadn’t realized Sarah’s beauty until he had seen other
people
o This relates as it demonstrates that in Judaism, personality and deeds take
precedence over attraction
Goals:
 To
 To
 To
 To
 To
present PPs with the opportunity to express themselves
discuss common high school age problems
provide a forum for open discussion
give PPs the chance to effectively communicate with the opposite sex
encourage acceptance and a positive self image
Objectives:
 PPs, through discussion, will realize misconceptions of popularity
 PPs will realize their problems are not unique to themselves
 High school “veterans” will communicate with underclassmen
 PPs will develop a greater respect for themselves
 PPs will communicate with one another and consequent feel more comfortable in
group situations
Materials:
 15 pens
 15 large pieces of paper
 One golf pen/PP
 One small piece of paper/PP
 Candles w/ matches + tin foil
Location:
 If warm- Carmel Pagoda, L-Pool Pagoda, Sun Dial Pagoda, Bayit Pagoda, Mirkaz
Pagoda, Boys Basketball Court, Girls Camp Pavilion, Lakeside Amphitheater, New
Beit Amphitheater, Misrad Pagoda, Back dock area, boys Gaga Pit area, soccer field
area, Omanoot area, and road to Girl’s Camp area
 If cold and/or rainy-girls in the New Beit and Mirkaz, guys in Chader Ochel and Beit
People:
 Group leaders (PAR Board + Gabe Schanll, Ellie Tepper, Sarah Coopeson, Jon Stieff,
Melissa Brenner, Tamar Godel, Josh Wexler, Joel Mumma)
 Two rovers
This resource has been provided by the North American Federation of Temple Youth.
For additional resources, visit our website at http://www.nfty.org.
Time






Table:
0:00-0:050:05-0:070:07-0:300:30-0:550:55-1:301:30-1:35-
Move into groups and go to locations
Names, TYG, hometown, grade, etc.
Popularity section
Self image section
Dating sections, trade questions with partner group
Conclude
Detailed Procedure:
 0:00-0:05- Move into groups and go to locations
Groups will be predetermined and announced at the program prior to this. Locations and
group leaders will also be announced, so that PPs know where to go and for whom to
look.
 0:05-0:07- Names, TYG, hometown, grade, etc.
GLs will introduce themselves then proceed to play a quick name game and ask each PP
their name, TYG, grade, hometown, and high school
 0:07-0:30- Popularity section
Before you begin, assure your PPs that anything and everything they say will be held in
the strictest of confidentialities. State that anything that is said in the group remains in
the group. Ask if anyone has a question about that and ask them to agree.
Read the following statement:
“In every high school portrayed on television there is a "popular" group. In TV shows it’s
usually the group of kids that are "too cool" for our favorite TV characters and usually
act stupidly. So why when we hit high school do we so anxiously try to be part of this
group? Why do we feel that it is necessary to act in a certain way to achieve a certain
social status?
Ask the PPs to raise their hands if their high schools have a popular group. Follow this up
by handing out the pieces of paper and golf pencils: ask each PP to make a “mental list”
of three of the most popular people in their school. Then ask PPs to write three or four
defining characteristics of one or all of these people. Go around in a circle and have each
PP read those characteristics. Keep track of their responses and discuss the positive and
negative responses. Follow this up by presenting the following discussion questions:
What does popularity mean?
Is there a need for a popular group? Is it logical not to have a popular group?
Have you at any point in your high school career been considered popular? How did that
feel? Did you treat others differently?
Do you try to be popular? Does your level of popularity matter to you? What do you do
to make yourself more popular? (dress well, act preppy, talk differently etc.)

0:30-0:55- Self image section
Read the following:
Throughout our lives, we are told to “be yourself.” However, we are constantly changing
and trying to improve ourselves. Judaism says that everyone is created B’tzelem Elohim:
This resource has been provided by the North American Federation of Temple Youth.
For additional resources, visit our website at http://www.nfty.org.
in the image of God. To most this is interpreted to mean that all people are equal upon
birth.
Ask the following questions:
Is the advice to “always be yourself” actually good advice? Should we stick with who we
are, or should we always try to improve?
What are characteristics in yourself you most value? (Have each PP read one aloud)
What are the characteristics of yourself you dislike the most? (Read one again)
What is a characteristic that you wish you possessed?
How do you work each day to improve yourself?
Why do some people have a negative self-image while others have an extremely positive
self-image?
How can someone improve their self-image?
Has your self-image improved or diminished as you have become older?
How do our actions affect the self-image of others?

0:55-1:30- Dating sections, trade questions with partner group
Read the following:
When we hit puberty, our relationships with the opposite sex become much more important
to us, in a way that we never could have understood during childhood. Dating and
relationships are extremely important topics for the typical high school student. We see this
all around us, with celebrities dating and breaking up constantly, movie characters having
one night stands, and even sitcom characters (like Corey, in “Boy Meets World”) having the
majority of their life revolve around the opposite sex.
Ask the following icebreakers:
How many of you are interested in dating someone at some point in high school or have
been interested in doing so in the past?
How many of you are completely confused by the opposite sex?
GL says to PPs, “Dating is probably the scariest times of your teenage lives when you are
most vulnerable to rejection.” Then ask the following questions:
What is the most important feature of a possible girlfriend/boyfriend?
What do you think the goal of high school dating is if not to find a spouse? Is it right?
Have you ever broken up with someone over something “stupid” (explain)?
This resource has been provided by the North American Federation of Temple Youth.
For additional resources, visit our website at http://www.nfty.org.
Have friends ever affected your relationships with a significant other?
Now move onto the final portion of the program. Announce that seeing as dating and
relationships are so confusing, we are going to have the chance to confidentially question
another group of the opposite sex. Each group can ask four (appropriate) questions but they
can cover anything (i.e. “is it always the guys responsibility to pay?”) Remind everyone that
this is completely confidential and no one will know who wrote or answered the questions.
Write down your groups four questions then contact the program leader, rover, or adult
leader, who will exchange your questions with another groups of the opposite sex. While the
questions are being exchanged, have some downtime. You will receive another group’s
questions, which you will answer and return. Then you will receive your own group’s
questions as answered by another group of the opposite sex. Discuss the answers and if
these are the answers you expected.
1:30-1:35- Conclude
This is the end of the program. Thank PPs for their maturity and remind them this is strictly
confidential.
This resource has been provided by the North American Federation of Temple Youth.
For additional resources, visit our website at http://www.nfty.org.