Download English 1302: Week Eight

English 1302: Week Eight
REVISING FOR THE DRAFT 1.2
Class Overview
 Announcements and Deadlines
 Addressing Mechanical Issues/Top Twenty Errors
 Revising Theses and Topic Sentences
 Reverse Outlining
 Paragraph-by-paragraph Workshop
Reminders and Deadlines
 Remember that the draft 1.2 should be a substantial
revision of the original: papers will be graded with
stricter guidelines than before and are being
measured for signs of revision.
 Your draft 1.2 should contain eight scholarly sources.
 Draft is due Monday March 24th.
Top Twenty Common Errors-Quick Help
Several of the Top Twenty Common Errors have to do with sentence structure.
Identifying sentence clauses can help us understand where a comma should be
placed and which verbs should correspond with which subjects.
Compound Sentence (contains complete clauses with subjects and verbs,
connected by a conjunction: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so OR FANBOYS)
 John went to the market, but he forgot his wallet.
Compound Verbs, two or more verbs referring to the same subject (actor) and
connected by a conjunction, do NOT require a comma before the conjunction.
 John went to the market but forgot his wallet.
Top Twenty Continued
Which of the following contain correct comma usage?
1. Philips also argues that modernist art requires viewer
interpretation, but does not agree with Jonson’s belief
that the viewer “constructs” the work.
2. Schmidt et al. confirm the role serotonin plays in mood
regulation, but they also indicate that the chemical’s
role in the sleep process is not completely understood.
3. Although many researchers have confirmed the
Mississippi River must be rerouted to prevent future
damage to the surrounding population, many are in
debate as to the most effective method of preventing
long-term damage to the native wetlands.
Faulty Sentence Structure
An independent clause is a complete grammatical thought
(complete subject and verb) that can stand on its own.
A dependent clause is one that cannot stand on its own and
requires an independent clause to make sense. (usually begins with
“If, while, because, whereas, not only, although, to [verb], or –ing
verbs (participial phrases))
A complex sentence has one or more dependent clauses.
Examples
 INDEPENDENT: “John Smith left home at an early age.”
 DEPENDENT: “Having left home at an early age.”
 COMPLEX: “Having left home at an early age, John developed a
strong work ethic.
Identify the Sentence-Structure Issue
Doctors Brown and Smith define four criteria for
understanding bipolar depression. Those being
severity of mood swings, genetic disposition,
frequency of mania, and the coincidence of major
depressive episodes.
2. Whereas early research found few results. Current
researchers suggest that bipolar disorder may
prove significantly distinct from major depression.
3. Many advocate for early-age medication treatment.
Although Brown argues that medications run the
risk of obstructing proper diagnosis.
1.
Returning to Higher-Order Concerns
 If you are having any of the following issues, you will
want to begin your revisions here (particularly in this
order):






Thesis: narrowness, accuracy to literature review style, clarity
Review topic: narrowness, focus on research conversation,
Synthesis: direct comparisons between articles, significant
comparisons, logic of comparisons and outcome statements
Sources: scholarly, clearly summarized (and synthesized!) argument,
at least 8 altogether(!), well-integrated, citation accuracy
Topic sentences: focus on conversation subtopic, apply to multiple
researchers, characterize a pattern in response to subtopic, can stand
alone in clarity
Style: emphasis is on researchers throughout, scholarly tone,
avoidance of argument
Reverse Outlining
 On the left margin of your paper, identify the topic of
each body paragraph in as few words as possible
 On the right, describe how the topic fits into the research
conversation (also in as few words as possible)
 If you’re having difficulty, consider what revisions may
be necessary to the paragraph structure and topic
sentence.
 Check to see if your “topics” come together clearly to
illustrate a research conversation: are these “topics”
focused on subject matter only, or are they focused on
researchers’ views?
Workshop Beginning
 Choose a partner and read to one another your “topic
sentence” paragraph from your homework.
 Is the thesis appropriate for a lit review? Does it
focus on research (“Current research…”) and identify
a significant trend/pattern in said research?
 Does the paragraph make sense? Do the topic
sentences apply to multiple researchers (broadly) as
opposed to specific researchers (too narrow)?


BAD EX: “Johnson identifies season as a primary determiner
in…”
BETTER: “Several researchers are in debate over the role that
season plays in the severity of manic episodes.”
Workshop Guidelines
 As we go down our structural outline for the
literature review, make sure to mark your own work
for potential problem spots.
 Trade your paper with a partner sitting near you and
provide written constructive criticism via notes on
the following elements (we will spend ten minutes on
each):



Introduction and thesis
A body paragraph: topic sentence, synthesis, and clarity
Organization of draft
Homework
 To prepare for the researched argument I want you to do
two things over the break:

1) Begin drafting a formal topic proposal in the manner of the
literature review
Your topic should be of a scholarly nature: no controversial/hotbutton topics (narcotics legalization, abortion, gun control, etc.); if
you’re not sure of a topic, ask me.
 Your argument should be arguable: don’t take a stance no one would
argue against, as you need to find a clear counterargument (a
researcher who argues the opposite of your stance)
 Try to use the word “should” in your argument thesis: “should” will
allow us to take a stance and make a call for something to be “done”
about a problem or debate. Your supporting reasons will end up
becoming subtopics for body paragraphs.


Find, read, and print out three arguments from newspapers or online
periodicals (New York Times, CNN, etc.)