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4-1
Communication in a Changing
World, 2006 Edition
4
C H A P T E R
Listening and Responding
to Others
Bethami A. Dobkin
Roger C. Pace
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-2
Listening and Responding to Others
•
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Communication in a Changing World
The Listening Process
Active and Passive Listening
Obstacles to Effective Listening
Communicating Responsibly: Being a Good
Listener
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-3
Communication in a Changing World
• Listening is a major part of communication
that many of us take for granted
• Good listening skills are important in both
our professional and personal lives
• Improving your listening skills will make
you a better communicator, assist you in
your professional life, and enrich your
interpersonal relationships
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-4
Communication in a Changing World
“The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend
is an accessible ear.”
—Maya Angelou, poet
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-5
Communication in a Changing World
• Hearing and Listening
– Hearing refers to the act of perceiving sounds
or other related stimuli
– Listening is the process of perceiving,
constructing meaning from, and responding to
spoken or nonverbal messages
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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Communication in a Changing World
Figure 4-1. Communication Time Spent Listening
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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The Listening Process
• Attending, the first stage in the listening
process, involves making the conscious
choice to listen
• Interpreting, the second stage, involves
giving meaning to sounds or related stimuli
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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The Listening Process
Figure 4-2. Stages of the Listening Process
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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The Listening Process
• Responding, the third stage of the listening
process, involves any discernable reaction
including both verbal and nonverbal
feedback
• Remembering, the final stage, involves the
retention and recall of messages
McGraw-Hill
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The Listening Process
“The greatest compliment that was ever paid
me was when one asked what I thought, and
attended to my answer.”
—Henry David Thoreau, author and
philosopher
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Active and Passive Listening
• Active listeners focus on the moment, are
aware of interactions as they unfold, respond
appropriately, and are aware of distractions
• Passive listeners expend little or no energy
in the listening process
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© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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Obstacles to Effective Listening
• Overcoming External Distractions
– Physical Environment
• Ask speaker to pause or repeat a statement
• Sit closer to the speaker
• Turn down the volume on electronic devices
– Message Context
• Understand and pay attention to the context in which
we listen to messages
– Media Noise
• Think about the influence that medium will have on
the listeners ability to understand you
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Obstacles to Effective Listening
• Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles
– Preoccupation with the Self
• Communicators who are consistently thinking about
what they are going to say instead of listening to
others miss much of the meaning in messages
– Preconceived Attitudes and Beliefs
• Often interfere with our listening effectiveness by
leading us to categorize messages before fully
understanding them
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
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Obstacles to Effective Listening
• Overcoming Attitudinal Obstacles
(continued)
– Personal Investment
• Personal investment can lead to selective attention,
ambushing, and avoidance of threatening
information
• Can be triggered by semantic noise, a barrier to
listening triggered by a particular word or phrase
used by a speaker, or indifference, a lack of interest
in listening
• Indifference often results in pseudolistening, or
pretending to listen
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-15
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
• Identifying Listening Goals
– Appreciation is the goal of listening for
pleasure or enjoyment
– Comprehension is the goal for listening for
understanding
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4-16
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
“Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.”
—Jimi Hendrix, rock musician
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Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
• Identifying Listening Goals
– Empathy is the goal of establishing common
ground between people by acknowledging the
legitimacy of feelings and giving support to
others
• Expressive communicators verbally acknowledge
how others feel and share experience
• Instrumental communication is listening or
responding to help other solve problems or goals
– Evaluation is the goal of listening to render an
opinion or judgment
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4-18
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
• Preparing to Listen
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McGraw-Hill
Clear your mind
Eliminate distractions
Set goals
Take notes when listening to presentations
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-19
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
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Improving Comprehension
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Maintaining an Open Mind
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3.
4.
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Using Perception Checks
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McGraw-Hill
Recognize your own interests and biases
Separate the message from its source
Identify key points in the message
Listen for unanticipated information
Paraphrase in your own words what the speaker
said
Ask questions
Identify areas of agreement with the speaker
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-20
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
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Choosing Your Response
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The response you make will influence what
happens next in the interaction
1. Make active choices about your feedback
2. Be careful about using negative feedback
3. Validate the speaker
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© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-21
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
• Making Communication Memorable
– Staying Involved While Listening
• The best way to remember an interaction is to make
an investment in it
– Organizing Information
• To be effective, the listener must often identify key
points and regroup material
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-22
Communicating Responsibly: Being a
Good Listener
• Applying Communication Concepts
– Listening and Responding During Interviews
• Are your questions clear and direct?
• How might you rephrase your questions if the
respondent has difficulty understanding you?
• Have you thought of follow-up questions that will
allow the speaker to stress points more clearly?
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-23
Summary
• By improving our listening skills, we
strengthen the foundation for shared
meaning in communication and increase
satisfaction with our interpersonal
relationships
• The four stages of the listening process are
(1) attending, (2) interpreting, (3)
responding, and (4) remembering
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-24
Summary
• Active listeners frequently remember more
information than passive listeners
• There are many obstacles, both internal and
external, to effective listening in every
communication situation
• The four listening goals are (1) appreciation,
(2) comprehension, (3) empathy, and (4)
evaluation
McGraw-Hill
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.
4-25
Summary
• Some of the ways to listen responsibly and
effectively include
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McGraw-Hill
Preparing physically and mentally to listen
Taking notes
Being open-minded
Using perception checks
Actively providing feedback
Demonstrating comprehension
Staying involved
Organizing material and information
© 2006 The McGraw-Hill Companies, Inc. All rights reserved.