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MNG 112: BUSINESS COMMUNICATION STUDENT NOTES 5 VERBAL AND NONVERBAL MESSAGES VERBAL MESSAGES Should a business communicator be concerned about verbal and nonverbal messages? In this lecture we will examine some aspects of two channels we all use to communicate: words and nonverbal behaviour (wordless messages). Words are the vessels that carry most of our ideas to others; as such how well you communicate your ideas will make the difference between success and failure. We sometimes forget that words, being the vessels, are not the ideas themselves and can sometimes carry incomplete and even different messages from what we intended. A simple statement like: “Let’s talk next Tuesday at 1p.m.” can be misinterpreted. You might mean: “Let’s meet next Tuesday,” while the receiver may interpret the remark to mean “Let’s discuss the matter over the phone.” A listener can understand the meaning of every word and still interpret a message in a way that is completely different from its intended meaning. To help in ensuring your verbal messages are clear and prevent miscommunication it is necessary to consider: a. How to ensure clarity and avoid ambiguity. There will be times when a lack of clarity may be desirable. b. The use of inflammatory language. c. The differences in male and female language usage. CLARITY AND AMBIGUITY Below are some ways to ensure clarity and avoid ambiguity when communicating: a. Use unequivocal terms to avoid misunderstandings. Unequivocal terms are those whose meanings are clear. Equivocal terms are those whose meanings are unclear. These must be avoided. For example: Client asks contractor to relocate plumbing fixtures. Contractor: “Sure, no problem.” To client no problem means no cost; to contractor it means “I can do it but of course it will cost.” Sometimes equivocal problems or misunderstandings arise because communicators from different fields use the same term in different ways. a. “Cover me.” For the police this may mean train your rifle on the suspect while I move from one position to the next. For the military it means bring down suppressive fire as I move from one position to the next. 1 b. “Secure a building.” For the military this means to gain possession of it with or without force and prevent anyone from destroying it. For the police it may mean to lock it up. Miscommunication can arise because of different cultural values. The Spanish word “ahorita” means “right now or immediately.” However when used in Mexico, because of their polychronic orientation to time, the activity may not take place immediately. This can cause problems with someone with a monochronic orientation to time. Sometimes equivocal misunderstandings only become apparent after the fact. Some can be avoided by double checking your understanding of the terms used. a. You agree to meet Wednesday, mention the date to ensure you both think of the same week. b. Your supervisor says your ideas are OK, determine if he means well done or adequate. b. Use lower level abstractions when clarity is essential. Any object or idea could be described at various levels, some very general and others quite specific. Low level abstractions are highly specific statements that refer directly to objects or events that can be observed. On the other hand high level abstractions cover a broader range of possible objects or events without describing them in much detail. Consider the following example which describes a problem from the general to the specific or from a high level abstraction to a lower level of abstraction: Problem Equipment problem Breakdown of copying machine Auto feeder does not work Sheets jammed in paper path High level abstractions can create problems because they can be subjected to a variety of interpretations. “Straighten up the area” – A quick clean up or a spit and polish job? “We need some market research” – A short questionnaire for a few customers or lengthy personal interviews for thousands of potential customers. “Bring me a list of your costs on this job” — General categories of costs or an itemization of every expenditure? “Give me your honest opinion” __ Be diplomatic or blunt. There will be times when high level abstractions will be useful. 2 Saying Social Sciences faculty, rather than referring to every department in the faculty. Since both abstract language and specific language have their advantages it is best to use both. One way is to begin explaining your proposal, problem, or request with an abstract statement and then qualify it with specifics. “I am worried about the amount of time we seem to be spending on relatively unimportant matters – abstract – In our last class, for instance, we talked about 20 minutes on what we did the previous class and only had 45 minutes to deal with the lecture- specific.” One common type of overly abstract language is the use of excessively broad terms such as: all, every, each, always any, none, never, no one, nothing nobody. When such terms are used try to echo the phrase. A: “Our needs never get considered around here.” B: “Never?” A: “I can’t understand anything he is saying.” B: “Anything?” A: “All the staff support the proposal.” B: “All of them?” c. Use jargon (specialized vocabulary) judiciously. Every profession has its own jargon. Jargon is a linguistic shortcut and it is important to learn the jargon of your profession, as it speeds up exchange of information and helps you to appear competent. (It is quicker for an accountant to say liquidity than “the degree to which an asset can be converted to cash.” However be careful when using it with outsiders as jargon can confuse and prevent your message being decoded. Jargon can have value for outsiders. Speakers who sprinkle comments with jargon could appear credible. If your goal is to “speaking to impress” and not “speaking to express” then you could use same. Beware though that while you may impress it does not mean that you will be understood. Jargon free speech is important when dealing with people not familiar with the English language or culture. “Would you like something to drink?” – This offers any kind of beverage. “Would you like to drink?” – This signals the availability of alcohol. d. Use ambiguous language when it is strategically desirable. Vague or indirect language can be a sign of deception, but there are situations when deliberate vagueness is the best approach. Irrespective of high or low context cultures, ambiguous language is useful when there is a need to promote harmony as well as to soften the blow of difficult messages. 3 Brute Honesty This work is not good enough You are disorganized and it is impossible to tell what you are driving at. Strategic Ambiguity I think the boss will want us to back up these predictions with figures I am having a hard time understanding that last idea. Can you run it by me again? The challenge will always be to find a way to be ambiguous without being dishonest or misunderstood. INFLAMMATORY LANGUAGE In communicating remember language has power to stir intense emotions. It can motivate, inspire, or amuse. But it can also generate feelings of antagonism, defensiveness, and prejudice. You can avoid negative outcomes by: a. Avoid biased language. These are terms that seem to be objective but actually conceal an emotional bias. Consider the range of words you could use to refer to a 25 year old man who disagrees with you: gentleman, fellow, guy, young man, kid, or person. All are denotatively correct but each paints a different picture depending on the context it is used. When faced with biased language, it might be a good tactic to restate the term in language that does not contain an evaluation. Speaker’s biased Language Listener’s Restatement “It is a gamble.” “So you do not think the idea is a reasonable risk. Is that it?” “He’s long winded.” “Bill has been talking for half an hour.” “She’s so wishy-washy.” “You think Susan isn’t willing to make a decision?” b. Beware of trigger words. These are terms that have strong emotional associations that trigger off an intense emotional reaction in certain listeners. A word that seems innocuous to one can trigger an avalanche of emotions in another. To deal with trigger words you must realize that you have your own trigger words. This can avoid you overreacting on hearing them. If you unwittingly utter trigger words for others and realize this it might be best to apologize and use a more agreeable term. Be aware of some words that can cause a negative reaction in others and avoid using them. MASCULINE AND FEMININE LANGUAGE USE Some social scientists have suggested that conversations between men and women are a kind of cross cultural communication in which members of each sex is not speaking 4 different dialects but “genderlects.” These different approaches affect the way men and women interact with one another in ways that are powerful but unnoticed. You need to understand that the listed differences in masculine/feminine speech do not apply to all men and women, since they are in fact general traits. The relationship between gender and language is like the one between gender and height: men are generally taller than women but some women are taller than men. Gender is not the only factor influencing conversational style between the male and female species, there is too: culture, geography, and occupation. It is felt that as the roles of men and women in society become less separate language differences may diminish. Feminine Speech. 1. Builds rapport: creates connections, establishes goodwill, shows support, and builds community. 2. Is an expressive tool to articulate emotions and clarify relationships: “I am worried about finishing those reports today.” “We don’t seem to be working well together.” 3. Is supportive. Women listen and respond to spoken and unspoken conversational clues about the other person’s feelings. They use “troubles talk” - sharing problems as a way to show solidarity. “Girl, I know what that is like as last year I had so much trouble in a similar matter with a client.” 4. Is tentative in nature: this is reflected in questioning forms. (“Could we go now.” “Would you type that for me.”); hedges and disclaimers (“I am not sure about these figures.”) and tag questions (“The report is due today, isn’t it?”) Speech forms like apologizing, especially when used by women, can create impression of less authority, status, uncertainty, accuracy or credibility. However tentative speech does not have to be regarded as weak as it can build rapport. 5. Is conversational initiation and maintenance. Women usually ask questions to get a conversation going or to find out what others are interested in (“Girl, did you hear about…?” “Are you going to…?” “Did you hear about?”) Women also use listening noises to show interest (Uh, Huh, Oh really). If women interrupt it is often to support or affirm the speaker and not to challenge or threaten. Masculine Speech. 1. Is report talk. This is speech that focuses less on feelings and relationships and more on information, facts, knowledge, and competence. Men are more inclined to use language to: claim attention, assert a position, establish status, and show independence. 2. Is instrumental (as opposed to expressive) to get things done: report information, solve visible problems, achieve, accomplish, attain, execute and perform. (“Fax these reports to accounting.” “Finish that proposal by Monday.”) Language is often used by men to define status. 5 3. Offers advice, rather than empathizing to show sympathy and establish solidarity when dealing with personal problems. 4. Is assertive, certain, direct, and authoritative. Men use statements of fact rather than opinion. (“That deduction belongs to Schedule C,” rather than, “I think that is a Schedule C deduction.”) Men are more likely to speak directly, giving clear and unambiguous commands or directions rather than couching requests in the form of questions. 5. Is conversationally dominating or controlling. These include verbosity, topic control and interruptions. Research supports that in conversations between men and women, men talk at greater length. Often in response to questions from women, men decide which topic of conversation to pursue and talk longer than the women in the same conversation. Research on interruptions is mixed as to who interrupts more but it appears that the purpose of men’s interruptions is often to gain control of the conversational topic or the conversation itself. How to Meet Gender-Related Language Challenges In any job environment problems can arise with the clashing of masculine and feminine language styles. Female: “I’m having difficulty with the Johnson account.” Her goal may be to gain support, establish connection, build rapport, or talk about the situation. Male: “Here’s one way you could handle it…” He may feel he has given information at the request of someone in need. However the female might interpret the male’s response as trying to come across as being superior. These three suggestions can help communicators understand and adapt to differing uses of language: a. Be aware of different styles. Knowing that men and women use language differently reduces the likelihood of being dismayed with a style that does not match yours. b. Switch styles when appropriate. If you only focus on the content of others’ remarks, consider paying more attention to the unstated relational messages and vice versa. If your first instinct is to be supportive, consider the value of offering advice and vice versa. c. Combine styles. In many situations you may get the best results by combining the masculine and feminine approaches. NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION Nonverbal communication consists of those messages expressed by other than linguistic means. CHARACTERISTICS OF NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION a. Nonverbal communication always has communicative value. Even if you 6 do not intend to send nonverbal messages you do so unwittingly by your appearance, every movement, every facial expression, and every nuance of your voice. You can shut off linguistic channels of communication by refusing to write or speak but it is impossible to avoid behaving nonverbally. b. Nonverbal communication is powerful. We form impressions about others mostly from nonverbal observations such as physical appearance and behaviour, and these impressions influence our impressions and judgments. Nonverbal behaviour can carry more weight that words. Consider how facial, bodily, and vocal behaviour can shape the meaning of these words: “Thanks a lot for your ideas. I’ll think about them.” When non verbal behaviour seems to contradict the verbal message, the spoken words carry less weight than the non verbal cues. c. Nonverbal behaviour is ambiguous. Even though nonverbal messages are always available they are not always easy to understand. (Is a yawn a sign of boredom or tiredness? Is someone trembling with nervousness or cold?) d. Nonverbal behaviour primarily expresses attitudes. Attitudes like disagreement, amusement, concern and so on can be easily expressed nonverbally. This is not the case with ideas and concepts. It would be difficult to express these messages non verbally: “Sales are running 16 percent above last year’s.” “I need more time to attend university classes.” “Let’s meet tomorrow at two to plan the agenda.” e. Much nonverbal behaviour is culture-bound. While certain types of nonverbal behaviours are universal, others vary with culture. (The hand sign that means “OK” in western culture has an obscene meaning in other cultures; the “yes” nod in some cultures means “no” in others.) TYPES OF NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION a. Voice. Social scientists use the term paralanguage to describe a wide range of vocal characteristics, each of which helps express an attitude: pitch (high-low); range (spread-narrow); articulation (precise-imprecise); rhythm (smooth-jerky); volume (loud-soft); resonance (resonant-thin); tempo (rapid-slow); disfluenc (um, er,etc); and pauses. The paralinguistic content of a message can reflect a speaker’s feelings. While paralanguage reflects feelings and attitudes, the emphasis on certain words can radically change the meaning of a statement. I need this job done right now. (Others might not) I need this job done right now. (It is important) I need this job done right now. (Forget the other jobs) I need this job done right now. (Immediately) b. Appearance. This plays an important role in determining how a communicator’s message will be received in business or elsewhere. As a rule, people who look attractive are considered to be likable and persuasive. Physical stature and type of clothing play a role in an attractive appearance. c. The face and eyes. A person’s face communicates emotions even though at times facial expressions can be ambiguous. Additionally, the eyes communicate a great deal as it is a good indicator of how involved a person is in a situation. The rules for eye 7 contact will vary from one culture to another. While lack of eye contact in one may indicate respect for elders, this may indicate lack of interest in another. d. Posture and movement. A person’s body communicates messages in several ways. The posture of someone sitting at a desk says something about attitude to work. Other bodily cues come from small gestures and mannerisms: fidgeting hands, a tapping foot, and clenched fists. Body relaxation is a strong indicator of who has the power in one on one situation. As a rule the more relaxed person has greater status. e. Personal space and distance. The distance we put between ourselves and others also reflects feelings and attitudes, and thus affects communication. Anthropologist Edward Hall identified four distance zones used by middle class Americans: intimate zone - physical contact to 18 inches; casual personal zone - 18 inches to 4 feet; social consultative zone - 4 ft to12 ft; and public zone - 12 ft and beyond. Research shows that a person who expects an unpleasant message or views the speaker as unfriendly takes a more distant position than does someone expecting good news or viewing the speaker as friendly. f. Physical environment. Apart from personal behaviours, our physical environment also sends nonverbal messages. It suggests how we feel and shapes how we communicate. Aspects that influence how an organisation’s members interact with each other include: (1). Space allocation. This gives an idea of power relationships. Some employees have offices while others do not; some offices are larger than others; some offices have better views than others. (2). Physical layout. Temperature and humidity affects communication. A study revealed that as they increase impressions of a speaker’s attractiveness decline. The message? Avoid having meetings in hot, stuffy rooms as these can affect the results. (3). Proximity. The distance separating people can influence who talks to whom. The difficulty of navigating that distance can also reduce interaction. Turning corners, wrestling doors open, and counters blocking access keep people apart. One Researcher found that the frequency with which a person spoke to colleagues was a direct function of the distance between desks. (4). Furniture arrangement. This plays a big role in the way people communicate. One study of a medical office showed that 10 percent of patients were at ease conversing with a doctor behind a desk. This number increased to 55 percent when the desk was removed. If you are a manager you could arrange your subordinates working areas to increase communication between those who have to interact regularly to get the work done. If you want to encourage communication among your workers you could arrange gathering spots where congregation is easy. This location must be central, must contain places to sit or rest, and must be comfortable. If you want to manage interaction between your employees and the public you can create the most desirable degree of accessibility by use of space and barriers. Proximity and visibility encourage contact while distance and closure discourage it. (5). Seating choices. Dominant positions are often at the head where they can see and be seen. Persons who want to diminish their potential for interaction often seat themselves in less visible positions at a table. 8 g. Time. The way we use time sends a number of silent messages: the amount of time spent on a task can reflect the importance of the task or inadequate knowledge; not finding time to talk over problems with employees, or one who finds time to talk with employees can signal how the employees are regarded; a person cutting one meeting to attend another could indicate the relative importance of the two meetings. END WORDS WOMEN USE The examples below were obtained from the email circuit and are just meant to be humorous. They in no way illustrate the differences in male and female use of language. They are just given to you to lighten up the lecture. JB Lovell FINE this is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. FIVE MINUTES if she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. NOTHING this is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine." GO AHEAD this is a dare, not permission. Don't do it. LOUD SIGH This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing." THAT'S OKAY this is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. THANKS a woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome. "WHATEVER" ...it's a woman's way of saying *! #@ YOU. 9 Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology! And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh! Oh, and before we forget 10